That was what it looked like on the face of it. Wasn't it?
Dirk picked up the other envelope, the one which had been waiting for him on his doormat, delivered there by courier from a large London bookshop where Dirk had an account. He pulled out the contents, which were a copy of the sheet music of Hot Pototo, written by Colin Paignton, Phil Mulville and Geoff Anstey.
The lyrics were, well, straightforward. They provided a basic repetitive bit of funk rhythm and a simple sense of menace and cheerful callousness which had caught the mood of last summer. They went:
Hot Potato,
Don't pick it up, pick it up, pick it up.
Quick, pass it on, poss it on, poss it on.
You don't want to get caught, get caught, get caught.
Drop it on someone. Who ? Who ? Anybody.
You better not have it when the big one comes.
I said you better not have it when the big one comes.
It's a Hot Potato.
And so on. The repeated phrases got tossed back and forward between the two members of the band, the drum machine got heavier and heavier, and there had been a dance video.
Was that all it was going to be? Big deal. A nice house in Lupton Street with polyurethaned floors and a broken marriage?
Things had certainly come down a long way since the great days of Faust and Mephistopheles, when a man could gain all the knowledge of the universe, achieve all the ambitions of his mind and all the pleasures of the flesh for the price of his soul. Now it was a few record royalties, a few pieces of trendy furniture, a trinket to stick on your bathroom wall and, whap, your head comes off.
So what exactly was the deal? What was the Potato contract? Who was getting what and why?
Dirk rummaged through a drawer for the breadknife, sat down once more, took the envelope from his coat pocket and ripped through the congealed strata of Sellotape which held the end of it together.
Out fell a thick bundle of papers.
Chapter 22
At exactly the moment that the telephone rang, the door to Kate's sitting-room opened. The Thunder God attempted to stomp in through it, but in fact he wafted. He had clearly soaked himself very thoroughly in the stuff Kate had thrown into the bath, then redressed, and torn op a nightgown of Kate's to bind his forearm with. He casually tossed a handful of softened oak shards away into the comer of the room. Kate decided for the moment to ignore both the deliberate provocations and the telephone. The former she could deal with and the latter she had a machine for dealing with.
'I've been reading about you,' she challenged the Thunder God. 'Where's your beard?'
He took the book, a one volume encyclopaedia, from her hands and glanced at it before tossing it aside contemptuously.
'Ha,' he said, 'I shaved it off. When I was in Wales.' He scowled at the memory.
'What were you doing in Wales for heaven's sake?'
'Counting the stones,' he said with a shrug, and went to stare out of the window.
There was a huge, moping anxiety in his bearing. It suddenly occurred to Kate with a spasm of something not entinely unlike fear, that sometimes when people got like that, it was because they had picked up their mood from the weather. With a Thunder God it presumably worked the other way round. The sky ootside certainly had a restless and disgruntled look.
Her reactions suddenly started to become very confused.
'Excuse me if this sounds like a stupid question,' said Kate, 'but I'm a little at sea here. I'm not used to spending the evening with someone who's got a whole day named after them. What stones were you counting in Wales?'
'All of them,' said Thor in a low growl. 'All of them between this size... ' he held the tip of his forefinger and thumb about a quarter of an inch apart, '...and this size.' He held his two hands about a yard apart, and then put them down again.
Kate stared at him blankly.
'Well... how many were thene?' she asked. It seemed only polite to ask.
He rounded on her angrily.
'Count them yourself if you want to know!' he shouted. 'What's the point in my spending years and years and years counting them, so that I'm the only person who knows, and who will ever know, if I just go and tell somebody else? Well?'
He turned back to the window.
'Anyway,' he said, 'I've been worried about it. I think I may have lost count somewhere in Mid-Glamorgan.
