and needy, but as a strong person who would make the best of her opportunities. She drew in a long breath and squared her shoulders. 'I'm all right now,' she said in answer to his unspoken question. 'Sometimes I miss him so badly. There's a part of me that can't accept that he's dead, that I'll never see him again.'
'Althea… I know that perhaps this is a cruel question, but I've wondered. Why?'
'Why did he take the ship I'd worked on for so many years and will it to my sister instead?' She glanced over at Grag to see his quick nod. She shrugged. 'He never told me. The closest he came to a reason was to say something about providing for my sister and her children. On good days, I tell myself that that meant he knew I could provide for myself and he was not afraid for me. On bad days, I wonder if he thought that I was selfish, if he feared that I would take Vivacia and care nothing for their welfare.' She lifted her shoulders again.
She caught a glimpse of herself in Grag's shaving mirror. For an eerie instant, her father looked out at her. She had his wiry black hair and dark eyes, but not his size. She was small, like her mother. Nevertheless, the resemblance to her father was still strong, in the set of her jaw and the way her brows drew together when she was troubled. 'My mother said that it was her idea and she talked him into it. She felt the estate had to be kept intact, the liveship inherited with the land holdings, so that the income from the one would go on supporting the other until all the debts were paid.'
She rubbed at her brow. 'I suppose that makes sense. When father decided that we would no longer trade up the Rain Wild River, he doomed us to a much lower income. The goods he brought back from the southlands were exotic, but nothing like the magic goods from the Rain Wilds. Our land holdings yielded well, but we could not compete with Chalced's slave-tended grain and fruit. Consequently, our debt for the ship is still substantial. Moreover, it is secured with our land holdings. If we fail to keep our promise to repay it, we could lose both ship and family land.'
'And you are hostage for that debt as well.' Grag pointed the fact out quietly. As a member of a Bingtown Trader family that owned a liveship, he was well aware of the standard terms for such a bargain. Liveships were rare and costly. Just as it took three generations for a liveship to quicken and come to cognizance, so it also took generations to pay for one. Only the Rain Wild Traders knew the source of the wizardwood lumber that made up the liveship hulls and figureheads. Only in a ship constructed of wizardwood could one safely negotiate the Rain Wild River and participate in the trade of their near-magical goods. Their value was such that families pledged their fortunes for them. 'In blood or gold, the debt is owed,' Grag added quietly. If the Vestrit family could not pay for the ship with coin, then a daughter or son of the family could be claimed.
Althea nodded slowly. Odd. She had known the terms of the bargain ever since she was old enough to be considered a woman, but somehow she had never applied it to herself. Her father had been a wonderful trader; he had always seen that there was money in the household to discharge their just debts. Now that her brother-in-law Kyle was in charge of the family's liveship and finances, who could say how things would go? Her sister's husband had never liked her. The last time they had been in the same room, in that final spectacular family argument, he had said it was her duty to marry well and stop being a burden on the family. Perhaps that was exactly what he had been hinting: that if she went willingly to a Rain Wild man, the family could enjoy a lessening of their debt.
Ever since she was a tiny child, her duties to her family's honor had been impressed upon her. A Bingtown Trader paid his debts and kept his word. No matter what their personal disagreements might be, when threatened by outsiders, the Traders closed ranks and endured. Those ties of kinship and duty included the Traders who had chosen to remain behind in the Rain Wilds and settle there. Distance and years might have separated them, but the Rain Wild Traders were still kin to the Bingtown Traders. Contracts with them were honored, and the duties of family were respected. She felt something inside her go hard and cold with purpose. If Kyle failed in the Vestrit family obligations, it would be her duty to offer herself. Fecundity was the one treasure the Rain Wild folk lacked. She would have to go to the Rain Wilds, take a husband there and bear children to him. It was what her forebears had promised, so long ago. Not to do so would be unthinkable. Nevertheless, to be forced into it by Kyle's malice or ineptitude was intolerable.
'Althea? Are you all right?'
Crag's voice broke in on her thoughts and brought her back to herself. She realized she was glaring at a bulkhead. She gave a small shake and turned to face him. 'I came to ask your advice, actually. I'm having a bit of trouble with one of the deckhands. I can't decide if I should take it personally or not.'
The concerned look on Grag's face deepened. 'Which one?'
'Feff.' Althea shook her head in mock frustration. 'One moment he listens and steps lively when I give an order. The next, he'll look me straight in the face and stand there with a silly grin on his face. I don't know if he's mocking me, or…'
'Ah!' Grag grinned. 'Feff's deaf. In his left ear. Oh, he will not admit it to anyone. It happened when he fell from the mast about two years ago. He hit the deck hard, and for a day or so, we thought he wasn't going to live. Eventually, he came out of it. He's a bit slower about some things than he used to be, and I don't send him aloft unless I have to. He doesn't seem to have the balance he once did. He can't always hear what you say, especially if he's to the right of you. Sometimes if the wind is blowing strong, he can't hear at all. He doesn't mean to be insubordinate… that's what the silly smile is about. Other than that, he's a good man, and he's been with the ship a long time. It wouldn't be right to tie him up for that.'
'Ah.' Althea nodded to herself. 'I wish someone had told me sooner,' she said a bit crossly.
'It's one of those things Da and I don't even think about anymore. It's just how the ship is. No one meant to make your job harder.'
'No, I didn't mean that,' Althea replied hastily. 'Everyone has gone out of their way to make my tasks easier. I know that. It's wonderful to be back on board a liveship again, and even more wonderful to discover that I actually can do this job. My father's will and my quarrel with Kyle and Brashen's concerns all made me wonder if I really was competent.'
'Brashen's concerns?' Grag asked in a quietly leading voice.
Why had she said it? Where had her mind been? 'Brashen Trell was my father's first mate on the Vivacia. After I signed aboard the Reaper, I found out he was part of her crew, too. When he discovered I was aboard as ship's boy… well. He had already made it plain to me back in Bingtown that he did not think I could cut it on my own.'
'So. What did he do? Tell the captain?' Grag asked when the silence had lengthened.
'No. Nothing like that. He was just… watchful. That's the word, I suppose. I had a tough time on that ship. Knowing he was watching me scrabble just to keep up made me feel… humiliated.'
'He had no right to do that to you,' Grag observed in a low voice. Two sparks of anger burned deep in his eyes. 'Your father took him on when no one else would. He owes your family. The least he could have done was protect you rather than mock your efforts.'
'No. It wasn't like that, not at all.' Suddenly she was defending Brashen. 'He didn't mock me. Mostly he ignored me.' When Crag's expression became even more indignant, she hastily clarified, 'That was how I preferred it. I did not want special treatment. I wanted to make it on my own. And I did, eventually. What bothered me was that he was a witness to how hard I had to struggle… I don't know why we're even talking about this.'
Grag shrugged. 'You brought it up, not I. There had always been a bit of speculation as to why your father took Brashen Trell on when his own family had given up on him. He'd been in enough trouble over the years that when his father threw him out, no one was really surprised.'
'What kind of trouble?' Althea heard the avidity in her own question and toned it down. 'I was just a girl when that happened, with little interest in Bingtown gossip. Years later, when he hired aboard the Vivacia, my father did not speak of it. He said a man deserves to be judged on who he is, not who he was.'
Grag was nodding to himself. 'It wasn't a noisy scandal. I know about it mostly because we schooled together. It started out in small ways. Pranks and silliness. As we got older, he was always the boy who would slip away when the master's back was turned. At first, it was just to avoid lessons, or go to the market and buy sweets. Later he was the boy who seemed to know more than the rest of us about things like girls and cindin and dice games. My father still says it was Trell's own fault his son went bad. Brashen always had too much money to spend and too much free time to amuse himself. No one drew a line with him. He'd get into mischief, like gambling more money than he had, or being drunk somewhere public in the afternoon, and his father would drag him home and threaten him.'
Grag shook his head. 'He never carried out his threats. A day or so later, Brashen would be on the loose, doing the same things again. Trell always said he was going to cut off his credit, cane him or make him work off his
