Can You Keep A Secret?

'It wasn't like that,' says Kerry, darting an annoyed look at Nev. 'There's been a… a crossed

wire. Some confusion!' She pats her hair, and gives me another smile. 'Obviously I'd be

delighted to help you with your career, Ems. You should have said before! Just call me at the

office, I'll do anything I can…'

I gaze back at her, full of loathing. I cannot believe she is trying to wriggle out of this. She is

the most two-faced cow in the entire world.

'There's no crossed wire, Kerry,' I say, as calmly as I can. 'We both know exactly what

happened. I asked you for help and you wouldn't give it to me. And fine, it's your company

and it was your decision and you had every right to make it. But don't try and say it didn't

happen, because it did.'

'Emma!' says Kerry, with a little laugh, and tries to reach for my hand. 'Silly girl! I had no

idea! If I'd known it was important…'

If she'd known it was important? How could she not know it was important?

I jerk my hand away and stare back at Kerry. I can feel all the old hurt and humiliation

building up inside me, rising up like hot water inside a pipe, until suddenly the pressure is

unbearable.

'Yes you did!' I hear myself crying. 'You knew exactly what you were doing! You knew how

desperate I was! Ever since you've arrived in this family you've tried to squash me down. You

tease me about my crap career. You boast about yourself. I spend my entire life feeling small

and stupid. Well, fine. You win, Kerry! You're the star and I'm not. You're the success and I'm

the failure. But just don't pretend to be my best friend, OK? Because you're not, and you never

will be!'

I finish, and look around the gobsmacked picnic rug, breathing hard. I have a horrible feeling

I might burst into tears, any moment.

I meet Jack's eye and he gives me a tiny, way-to-go smile. Then I risk a brief glance at Mum

and Dad. They're both looking paralysed, as if they don't know what on earth to do.

The thing is, our family just doesn't do loud, emotional outbursts.

In fact, I'm not entirely sure what to do next myself.

'So, um… I'll be going, then,' I say, my voice shaking. 'I'll be off. Come on, Jack. We've got

work to do.'

With wobbly legs, I turn on my heel and head off, stumbling slightly on the grass. Adrenalin

is pumping round my body. I'm so wound up, I barely know what I'm doing.

'That was fantastic, Emma,' comes Jack's voice in my ear. 'You were great! Absolutely…

logistical assessment,' he adds more loudly as we pass Cyril.

'I've never spoken like that in my life,' I say. 'I've never… operational management,' I quickly

add, as we pass a couple of people from Accounts.

'I guessed as much,' he says, shaking his head. 'Jesus, that cousin of yours… valid assessment

of the market.'

'She's a total — spreadsheet,' I say quickly as we pass Connor. 'So… I'll get that typed up for

you, Mr Harper.'

Somehow we make it into the house and up the stairs. Jack leads me along a corridor,

produces a key and opens a door. And we're in a room. A large, light, cream-coloured room.

With a big double bed in it. The door closes, and suddenly all my nerves flood back. This is it.

Finally this is it. Jack and me. Alone in a room. With a bed.

Then I catch sight of myself in a gilded mirror, and gasp in dismay. I'd forgotten I was in the

stupid Snow White costume. My face is red and blotchy, my eyes are welling up, hair is all

over the place, and my bra strap is showing.

This is so not how I thought I was looking.

'Emma, I'm really sorry I waded in there.' Jack's looking at me ruefully. 'I was way out of line.

I had no right to butt in like that. I just… that cousin of yours got under my skin-'

'No!' I interrupt, turning to face him. 'It was good! I've never told Kerry what I thought of her

before. Ever! It was… it was…' I tail off, breathing hard.

For a still moment there's silence. Jack's gazing at my flushed face. I'm staring back, my

ribcage rising and falling, blood beating in my ears. Then suddenly he bends forward and

kisses me.

His mouth is opening mine, and he's already tugging the elastic sleeves of my Snow White

costume down off my shoulders, unhooking my bra. I'm fumbling for his shirt buttons. His

mouth reaches my nipple and I'm starting to gasp with excitement when he pulls me down

onto the sun-warmed carpet.

Oh my God, this is quick. He's ripping off my knickers. His hands are… his fingers are…

I'm panting helplessly… We're going so fast I can barely register what's happening. This is

nothing like Connor. This is nothing like I've ever — A minute ago I was standing at the door,

fully clothed, and now I'm already — he's already -

'Wait,' I manage to say. 'Wait, Jack. I just need to tell you something.'

'What?' Jack looks at me with urgent, aroused eyes. 'What is it?'

'I don't know any tricks,' I whisper, a little gruffly.

'You don't what?' He pulls away slightly and stares at me.

'Tricks! I don't know any tricks,' I say defensively. 'You know, you've probably had sex with

zillions of supermodels and gymnasts and they know all sorts of amazing…' I tail off at his

expression. 'Nevermind,' I say quickly. 'It doesn't matter. Forget it.'

'I'm intrigued,' says Jack. 'Which particular tricks did you have in mind?'

Why did I ever open my stupid mouth? Why?

'I didn't!' I say, growing hot. 'That's the whole point, I don't know any tricks.'

'Neither do I,' says Jack, totally deadpan. 'I don't know one trick.'

I feel a sudden giggle rise inside me.

'Yeah, right.'

'It's true. Not one.' He pauses thoughtfully, running a finger around my shoulder. 'Oh, OK,

Maybe one.'

'What?' I say at once.

'Well…' He looks at me for a long moment, then shakes his head. 'No.'

'Tell me!' And now I can't help giggling out loud.

'Show, not tell,' he murmurs against my ear, and pulls me towards him. 'Did nobody ever

teach you that?'

EIGHTEEN

I'm in love.

I, Emma Corrigan, am in love.

For the first time ever in my entire life, I'm totally, one hundred per cent in love! I spent all

night with Jack at the Panther mansion. I woke up in his arms. We had sex about ninety-five