I don’t get seriously involved, Dev had said.
Maybe not now, but once she had. Natalie was certain of that.
Somewhere, sometime, there had been a woman who had mattered.
And whoever she had been, she’d left indelible marks.
• 87 •
RADCLY fFE
There were other marks too. Ones she hadn’t expected. A series of scars
crisscrossed Dev’s right thigh below her boxers, twisting as far down as her
knee. The pale white rivulets were faded reminders of some distant injury, and
Natalie ached to think of what might have caused them. She caught back a
murmur of sympathy.
Dev turned and smiled. “Hey. Good morning. Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake
you.”
Smiling back, Natalie consigned whatever history lay beneath those scars to the
past. Dev was here now and looking very sexy.
Natalie extended her arms over her head, arched her back, and stretched
beneath the blanket with a contented purr. She was naked, and she could tell
from the ? icker of Dev’s eyes down the length of her body and quickly back up
to her face that the thin covering didn’t do a whole lot to camou? age her shape.
“No problem. You’re a nice sight to wake up to.”
“Can I tempt you with coffee?”
“You can tempt me with just about anything.”
Dev laughed. “I trust the couch and the brandy left no ill effects?”
“Not a one.” Natalie swiveled around to sit up, holding one corner of the
blanket between her breasts. “I feel great.”
Dev thought she looked great too. Her eyes and mouth were soft in the early
morning light, her dark hair framing her face like an invitation.
She was beautiful and warm and Dev wondered why she didn’t cross the room
to her and lift the blanket away and accept what Natalie was offering.
Tenderness and shared pleasure. Natalie had asked for no promises, made no
demands.
Maybe it was because Dev liked her, really liked her in a way that she rarely
experienced because she seldom made close friends, that she didn’t. Shouldn’t
she have something to offer too? Shouldn’t there be something more than
desire?
As if reading her mind, Natalie said quietly, “Sometimes things are enough just
as they are, Dev.”
Dev poured coffee into two white ceramic mugs with I ¦ Lake George on the
side. “Black, right?”
Natalie nodded.
“Just in case you thought otherwise,” Dev said, setting Natalie’s coffee on the
maple Americana end table beside the couch, “it’s not
• 88 •
WHEN DREAMS TREMBLE
about you.” She leaned down and softly kissed Natalie. “I’m a little turned
around these days. Sorry.”
“Thanks for the coffee.” Natalie didn’t reach for her because she had a feeling if
she pushed just a little harder than she had been, Dev would relent. And it
wasn’t about having her. Not entirely. She wanted her, but not like that. Not
when she knew something inside Dev would end up hurting more. “I understand,
by the way. If you want a sounding board sometime, anytime, I’m available.”
“Thanks, but it’s something that talking won’t change. Just some old stuff that
needs to stay in the past, where it belongs.” She retrieved her own coffee and
sipped. “I know the minute you drive away, I’ll feel like an idiot.”
“Good. You should.” Natalie wrapped the blanket around herself and stood.
“I’m going to take a shower. Do you have time to wait?”
“Sure. They make a good breakfast at the lodge. How about it?”
“I’ll be ready in ? ve.”
v
Leslie awakened just before six, relieved to see the morning. The night had been
? lled with fragmented dreams and disturbingly erotic half-formed images of
making love with Rachel who became Dev who became Mike who became
Leslie herself in an endless loop of increasingly frantic and unrequited desire.
More distressing still, her body thrummed heavily with lingering arousal.
Surprised, she traced her ? ngers between her legs and discovered that she was
wet. The ER
doctor had clearly been right when he’d said hormones might be at the root of
her heart and blood pressure problems, because something was de? nitely
amiss with her body.
While she enjoyed sex, it wasn’t something she ordinarily paid much attention
to. Certainly thoughts of making love never occupied her conscious mind or
disturbed her concentration. She couldn’t ever remember feeling as if she
needed sex. When it occurred, it was a pleasurable interlude. Even on the
infrequent occasions when she and Rachel spent the entire night together, she
couldn’t recall waking aroused, not even with Rachel’s body against hers.
Rachel particularly enjoyed sex in the morning, so they made love then, but
Rachel always initiated it. Leslie apparently was a good partner, as Rachel
always
• 89 •
RADCLY fFE
seemed satis? ed. As for herself, Leslie found being intimate with Rachel
pleasant, and she almost always achieved orgasm. And then it was over and she
was free to focus on the things that did occupy her mind.
She never woke up with the urge to be touched. Not like she had right now.
“What I have,” Leslie muttered as she abolished the remaining pieces of the
dream and headed for the shower, “is way too much time on my hands.”
No wonder she never took vacations. She was mentally and physically
completely out of sync. As she twisted on the shower knobs, she spoke aloud
as if that would ensure results. “All that’s about to change. What I need is a trip
to the of? ce.”
By 6:30 a.m., she was dressed in casual business attire—slacks and blouse and
low heels. Briefcase in hand, she started along the path to the lodge, intent on
regaining control of her life. When she ran into Dev and her overnight guest, she
realized that her plan might turn out to be a bit more challenging than she
anticipated. Dev’s companion had her arm loosely around Dev’s waist, and she
looked relaxed and comfortable. Con? dent.
Leslie greeted them both politely, surprised when Dev blushed.
Natalie reintroduced herself, although Leslie remembered her name quite well.
“Going to work?” Dev asked.
