She blinked several times, realized she’d been staring at her duffel for a minute or two. That wasn’t a question she could answer now, when she had a dozen details to settle regarding her life in L.A.
“So what?”
She could come back, whenever she wanted.
“Shut up.”
Slinging the duffel over her shoulder, she made her way out. Her brother was the first stop, and she discovered him barely awake.
“Hey,” he said with a sleepy smile. “Why are ya leaving so early?”
“Long drive, bro.” Smiling, she sat and took his hand. “I’ll have to stop overnight and make the rest of the trip tomorrow.”
“Oh. That’s right.” He frowned. “I wish you didn’t have to go all that way alone.”
“I’m a cop, remember? Besides, I made it out here fine, worrywart. I’ll call you when I get home if that’ll make you feel better.”
“It will. But I don’t have a cell phone anymore. God knows what happened to my old one.”
“I’ll just call Nick or Aric. I’ve got their cell numbers.”
Too observant for her comfort, Micah eyed her in speculation. “Ro, I don’t want to butt in where it’s not my biz—”
“Then don’t.”
“I have to. You’re the only sister I have, and if Aric’s playing with your feelings I want to know,” he said in a cool voice.
“No, he’s not,” she said quietly. “That’s not it.” Fresh pain stabbed her middle, but she pushed it down.
“You have feelings for him.” A statement, not a question.
“Yeah. But I’m not sure those feelings are
Her brother grimaced. “Whoa, TMI. I’m gonna need an extra month of therapy for that image alone, thanks so much.”
“You’re welcome.” It was nice to see he still could joke about some things. “So how do I know?”
“By doing exactly what you are—put some distance between you and temptation. If these feelings quickly become nothing more than a fond memory, you move on. Easy.”
“And if my guts still feel like they’re being turned inside out a week or a month from now?”
He studied her for a long moment. “Has anyone told you about wolf shifters and mates?”
“Yes.” She paused. “Jax and Kira are mates. Aric told me more about the subject, too, like how a wolf shifter needs to bite his intended Bondmate, and then they can’t live without each other.”
He fell silent. Anxiety formed a knot in her chest.
“Micah, Aric and I are not mates. He hasn’t made any move whatsoever to claim me . And he’s letting me go without a single protest.”
“That doesn’t sound like the Aric I know, to let something just go that he really wants.” He blew out a breath. “But maybe you’re right. Ask him, okay? Just put it out there, point-blank, and ask him if he’s sensed a bond between you, if he’s felt the need to claim you. If so, that would explain part of the intense pull between you.”
“I’m not sure I should. What if he thinks I’m trying to trap him or something? I don’t want to be a clinging vine.”
“Just do it. He’ll be straight with you, if he’s the same guy I’ve known for years.”
“All right. Thanks, little bro.” She gazed at him, reluctant to go. “I wish I could stay longer.”
“Get going. I don’t want you driving after dark.”
The order sounded paternal, and coming from him it was funny. Rising, she gave him a fierce hug, and then kissed his scarred cheek. “I love you.”
“And I love you. Now get before you make me all mushy.”
“See you soon.”
“Not if I see you first.”
Lifting her purse and duffel, she blew him a kiss and left, trying not to cry. For the most part she succeeded, except for a couple of stray tears that she swiped fast, before anyone saw. She found the guys in the rec room, Ryon and Zan playing Wii games, the others shooting the shit and watching TV. Kalen noticed her immediately, and looked over his shoulder at her from his spot on the sofa.
“Hey, you going already?”
“Afraid so.” Her gaze went to Aric and her smile trembled on her lips. He rose from his spot next to Kalen and walked over slowly. This was going to be much harder than she’d believed. “Hi.”
“Can I help you to your car with that?”
“Sure.”
He took her duffel and the guys hugged her good-bye one by one. Even A.J., whom she was sorry she hadn’t gotten to know better. There would be time, though, to foster those relationships. Her brother worked there.
And Nick had given her an opportunity to consider. A great one.
They headed outside and walked around the building to her car. Someone had pulled it up to the front and left the keys in the ignition. Some cop she was—she hadn’t even realized the keys were missing in the first place.
Aric tossed the bag into the backseat, shut the door, and then opened the driver’s door for her. “I’m going to miss you. Until you come back, that is,” he said.
Was that a note of sadness in his voice? Or was it wishful thinking on her part?
“Hopefully it won’t be too long. A few weeks at most.” She touched his face, traced his lips. “I’ll miss you, too.”
“You’ll probably forget all about me the second you get home, back to the force and the people you’re devoted to protecting.” His lips curved upward and he nibbled her fingers.
Staring into his beautiful green eyes, she knew that wasn’t true. What good was that life, the job that used to mean so much, without this man in it? She’d take a few weeks, see if she felt the same longing to be with him.
“Don’t count on that happening,” she told him. “I could never forget. In fact, it’s highly possible you really aren’t getting rid of me.”
“What… what do you mean?”
“I need to ask you something. Will you answer honestly?”
He shrugged, his gaze wary. “Sure.”
“I’ve felt drawn to you. I’ve mentioned that before. Now that it’s time to go, I feel like my insides are being twisted into a thousand knots, and it’s because I’m leaving you. Does it… do you feel the same way?”
For several heartbeats, he stared at her bleakly. “No,” he rasped. “I don’t feel anything like that. I’m sorry.”
“Oh.” The word emerged as though she’d been punched. “I— Okay. Well. That was stupid of me, huh? Take care, Aric. I’ll see you when I come back to visit my brother.”
“All right. See you.”
She slammed the door shut as soon as he stepped back, fired up the car, and pulled away. Started down the drive without looking back. After he disappeared from sight she let the tears flow. She didn’t bother to wipe them away.
No way could she accept Nick’s offer now. It would hurt too damned much to work with Aric.
With the man she’d somehow stupidly fallen in love with.
And there she had her answer, at a painful price. She loved him, and he didn’t feel the same way. Thank God she hadn’t made an even bigger idiot of herself by telling him.
The drive stretched ahead, long and lonely as the trip had been days before. When she’d started out, she never dreamed she’d find her brother alive and experience the greatest high because of it.
She also never imagined finding the one man she could love, here in Bumfuck, Wyoming. And that she’d leave forever changed. Heartbroken.
L.A. loomed ahead, a smog-filled hostile sea of strangers where it had once been home.
