We had said this was the place to come if an apocalypse happened. It happened, and I was here. Without my girls.
I shook off the thought, refusing to shed another tear. They were on their way here, and I had to get this place ready for them. There was definitely plenty of work to do, but I knew I would collapse soon, and certain precautions needed to be taken so I could fall asleep safely. There were old boards in the barn, but the bull was in there, too. Securing the windows and the perimeter and burying Leah and the doctor would have to be done before I could sleep. All of that would likely take all day. I stood up and took a deep breath, wondering how much more I could push my body before it just couldn’t go any longer.
I walked around the back to the shed and found a shovel, and then found a nice spot under the big maple tree on the south side of the house, and began to dig.
Nathan
MY EYES BULGED AND I blinked, trying to clear them so I could figure out where we were. I’d just had the mother of all nightmares, and Zoe was still in my arms asleep, but I could tell from the musty smell that we weren’t home.
When the room finally came into focus, feelings of both relief and dread came over me. The dread overpowered the relief without effort. We were running for our lives. Jill was either dead or would be soon, my wife was gone, and Zoe and I were on the run.
To my right were the old couple, Walter and Joy. Walter was asleep in his recliner, snoring. He would suck air in through his nose, and then blow it out from his mouth, the air building up until it escaped from his lips. Joy was awake, watching me with a smile.
“He’s always done that,” she said quietly. “Used to drive me nuts. Now it’s relaxing.”
I sat up, careful not to wake Zoe. The sun lit up the room from the small rectangular windows near the ceiling. The television was on, but muted.
“I don’t think the news is going to come back on, but at least we still have electricity.”
I nodded, folding my arms across my chest. “Wonder if you’ll get a bill?”
Joy laughed once. “I doubt it. I saw my postman walk by yesterday afternoon.”
That struck me as funny, even though it was morbid as hell, and I couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled to the service. Joy began to giggle, too. We were trying not to wake Walter and Zoe, so our laughter consisted of breathing and shuddering. Joy’s eyes began to water, and then she stood. “I’m going to make a cup of coffee. Want one?”
I nodded. “I better go with you.”
I made sure Zoe was still snugly tucked into the blanket, and then I followed Joy upstairs. She started a pot in silence, and I checked outside. There were no broken windows or open doors, and I didn’t see any of the sick, either. I stepped onto the porch. In the distance, I could barely make out the sound of the alarm from the highway. It was still going off. Skeeter, Jill, and even Aubrey crossed my mind: where they were, if they were safe, if they got any rest the night before. Other people from my life flooded my thoughts as well. My boss, who was a huge asshole, but his wife and children were very sweet; my cousin Brandon and his six kids; our neighbors; Mrs. Grace, my second grade teacher. It was possible that almost everyone I’d ever known was dead. Or . . . a version of dead.
Joy was just pouring the steaming, dark coffee into a mug when I returned to the kitchen. “I meant what I said last night,” she said, encouraging me to sit. “You and Zoe are welcome here for as long as you like.”
I added creamer and sugar to my cup and swirled it around with a spoon. “I appreciate that. But don’t you think it’s dangerous to try to see this through in town? We just came from Fairview. We were inside the church with several other people. The sick were trying to tear it apart. I left with Zoe because it’s only a matter of time before they got in.”
“I couldn’t imagine leaving here. I don’t know where we’d go.”
“Do you know anyone with some land near here? Out of the way? That’s what I was hoping we would come across.”
Joy thought for a minute. Instead of answering, she took a sip of coffee. Her eyes were kind, the light blue in her irises even more pronounced bordered by her silver hair, but they also gave her away. She was holding something back. I didn’t know these people, but if I had a chance of learning whatever it was that she was keeping from me, it was in that moment, while I had Joy alone.
“I understand. You don’t know me or Zoe. I didn’t mean to pry.”
Joy frowned, clearly conflicted. “Oh, it’s not that, Nathan. I’m just not sure.”
“Sure of what?”
The basement door opened. “Your little girl is awake, Nathan. I tried talking to her, but I think she’s confused. You might get down there before she gets too upset,” Walter said. “Bring her up for some breakfast. We’ll try to keep her mind off things.”
I nodded with an appreciative smile, and then left the table, hoping that wasn’t my only chance.
Chapter Fourteen
Scarlet
THE FRIDGE HAD AN ENTIRE case of bottled water inside. I took the first bottle, unscrewed the lid, and chugged it. Just two days before it would have taken an entire morning at work for me to finish that amount, but I felt like I hadn’t had anything to drink in weeks. I opened another, and sucked the water down until only a quarter was left in the bottle.
It had taken me most of the morning to dig one hole, I still had one more to dig, and a dozen other things to do before I could rest. It had been more than twenty-four hours since I’d slept. I was physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted.
I trudged back to the backyard, staring at the bodies of Dr. Hayes and his girlfriend, Leah, lying side by side. Dragging him up the stairs was almost the hardest thing I’d ever done, second only to giving birth. At the halfway point on the stairs, I paused to rest and nearly let him go. The only thing that kept me going was weighing the alternative: to dismember him and carry the smaller bits upstairs. Easier, yes, but a whole hell of a lot messier.
I leaned against the tree, feeling lightheaded. My body was screaming for rest. Before I was passed out and vulnerable outside, my sense of self-preservation told me to retreat inside the house. With only one objective in mind, I stumbled into the laundry room, descended the stairs, and shut myself in the basement, pulling the old loveseat against the door with the last bit of my energy. My body collapsed onto the scratchy cushions, and before I could have another thought, I lost consciousness.
• • •
WHEN I FIRST PEELED MY eyes open, I saw tan, soiled carpet and the adjacent wall going in and out of focus. Everything was devoid of sound, even the air. My line of sight followed the carpet until the chunky remnants from the tussle with the doctor and Leah came into view.
It was then that my heart broke into a million pieces. I wasn’t sure what time it was, or what day it was, but I knew I was in hell. My children were somewhere else where I couldn’t protect them, and I was alone. It took longer that time to recover from mourning my situation, but I gave myself adequate time to cry, and then I went to the doctor’s gun safe. It was one of many, but it was the only one open. A rifle stood out to me, and fit well in my hands, so it accompanied me upstairs.
The position of the sun confused me at first. It was higher in the eastern sky than it was when I decided to rest.
The doctor’s bloody shirt was damp with dew. The thought of being out for so long was disturbing, and a flood of emotions came over me. What had the girls been doing the day before and all night? Irrational feelings like the fear that they wouldn’t survive if I hadn’t worried about them every minute of every hour crept into my mind.
