As our confusion turned to shock and anger, we barraged the little man with questions. He endured them with a slightly bored expression, standing at the center of the room with his hands folded demurely over his privates.
“If you’d actually permit me to speak, I’ll explain everything,” he said.
“Where is Miss Peregrine?!” Emma shouted again, trembling with rage.
“Don’t worry,” Caul said, “she’s safely in our custody. We kidnapped her days ago, on your island.”
“Then the bird we rescued from the submarine,” I said, “that was …”
“That was me,” Caul said.
“Impossible!” said Miss Wren, finally finding her voice.
“Wights can’t turn into birds!”
“That is true, as a general rule. But Alma is my sister, you see, and though I wasn’t fortunate enough to inherit any of her talents for manipulating time, I do share her most useless trait—the ability to turn into a vicious little bird of prey. I did a rather excellent job impersonating her, don’t you think?” And he took a little bow. “Now, may I trouble you for some pants? You have me at a disadvantage.”
His request was ignored. Meanwhile, my head was spinning. I remembered Miss Peregrine once mentioning that she’d had two brothers—I’d seen their photo, actually, when they were all in the care of Miss Avocet together. Then I flashed back to the days we’d spent with the bird we had believed was Miss Peregrine; all we’d gone though, everything we’d seen. The caged Miss Peregrine that Golan had thrown into the ocean—that had been the real one, while the one we “rescued” had been her brother. The cruel things Miss Peregrine had done recently made more sense now—that hadn’t been Miss Peregrine at all—but I was still left with a million questions.
“All that time,” I said. “Why did you stay a bird? Just to watch us?”
“While my lengthy observations of your childish bickering were incontrovertibly fascinating, I was quite hoping you could help me with a piece of unfinished business. When you killed my men in the countryside, I was impressed. You proved yourselves to be quite resourceful. Naturally, my men could’ve swept in and taken you at any point after that, but I thought it better to let you twist in the wind awhile and see if your ingenuity might not lead us to the one ymbryne who’s consistently managed to evade us.” With that, he turned to Miss Wren and grinned broadly. “Hello, Balenciaga. So good to see you again.”
Miss Wren moaned and fanned herself with her hand.
“You idiots, you cretins, you morons!” the clown shouted.
“You led them right to us!”
“And as a nice bonus,” said Caul, “we paid a visit to your menagerie, as well! My men came by not long after we left; the stuffed heads of that emu-raffe and boxer dog will look
