water.
I felt lightheaded. Perhaps it was the sun. The Ur force is being disrupted, I heard. It seemed the ground was far beneath me. My feet could hardly touch it.
I lay on my back. The high, hot sun of the Tahari burned in the sky.
'Drink,' said Hassan, bending over me. 'Alas,' he said, 'the water bag is empty.'
'At least,' said Samos, 'it is cooler now. That is a relief.'
'Yes,' I said.
'I am sorry you are so hungry,' said Imnak. 'I would like to give you something to eat, but there is no food in the cam. I think maybe one should go hunting.'
'Yes,' I said. 'Let us go hunting.'
'Are you not coming?' asked Imnak.
'I am weak,' I said. 'I am tired. I think I will lie here for a little while.'
'You have drunk very little, and you have not eaten in three days,' said Imnak.
'Yes,' I said.
'That is probably why you are so hungry,' speculated Imnak.
'That is probably it,' I agreed.
'There is a storm coming, Captain,' said Thunock. 'Sensible ships, in such a season, are safe in port.'
'Even warriors long sometimes for the sight of their own flags, stop friendly walls, for the courtyards of their keeps, for the hearths of their halls. Thus admit the Codes.'
I struck the sword from the hand of Marlenus of Ar.
'One must seek medicine helpers in certain ways,' said Canka. 'If you would do this thing, you must do so in the correct manner.'
'I will abide your wishes,' I said.
'There is no assurance the medicine helper will come,' said Kahintokapa.
'I understand,' I said.
'In seeking medicine helpers, sometimes men die,' said Kahintokapa.
'I understand,' I said.
'This thing is not easy,' said Cuwignaka.
'I understand,' I said.
The shield of Hci rose like a moon, inexorably, exposing him to the lance of the Yellow Knife. The moon raced through the clouds. There are many ways to understand what one sees.
'A storm is coming, Captain,' said Thurnock.
A small package, oblone, heavy, brought from among the articles in Grunt's lodge, in the festival camp, lay near me on the stones.
I struggled to sit up, cross-legged, on the stones. I put my hands on my knees.
I felt rain.
Lightning burst in the sky and thunder rolled and crashed about me, like the waves between the banks of the horizons.
Torrents of cold rain desceneded in diagonal sheets, pounding at the rocks, tearing at the leaves of nearby trees.
'Who is that woman?' I asked.
'It is said she was once the daughter of Marlenus of Ar.' I was told. 'Then, for dishonoring him, she was disowned.' Her figure, veiled, clad in the robes of concealment, had vanished, gone from the corridor.
'You are a weakling!' she cried, in the hall of Samos. 'I hate you!'
'You would let me go,' she asked, 'rather than throw me to your feet and whip me, and master me?'
'Give her passage to Ar,' I said.
'Here is the slave, Captain,' said Thurnock. He threw her to the tiles before my curule chair. 'On your knees before your master, Slave,' he said.
She looked up at me.
I fondled the whip, thoughfully, idly, that lay across my knees.
'I love you,' cried Vella, suddenly beside me, kneeling at the side of my curule chair, her hands on my arm. 'I love you! I will please you more. I will please you a thousand times more!'
Lightning lit the sky. Thunder cracked. Rain tore its way downward.
'It is a severe storm,' said Ivar Forkbeard, near me, on the deck of his serpent.
The lightning again illuminated the stormy sky and the driving torrents of rain, and then the lightning and rain were gone, and then there were great ringing blows, and the great hammer of Kron, of the Metal Workers, lifting and falling, smote on a mighty anvil, showering sparks in the night, which fell into the calm sea and glowed there like diamonds, and I rolled to my back and looked upwards to see that the diamonds were in the sky, and were stars.
It beings in the sweat lodge. This is a small lodge, rather oval and rounded. A man may not stand upright within it. One constructs a framework of branches. This framework is then covered with hides. In the center there is a hole, in which the hot stones, passed in from the outside on a forked stick, are placed. Cups of water are poured on the stones. When the stones cool they are removed from the lodge and reheated. There are many rituals and significances connected with the sweat lodge, having to do with such things as the stones, the fire, the orientation of the lodge, the path between the lodge and the fire, the amounts and ways in which the water is poured, and the number of times the lodge is opened. I shall not enter inot these matters in depth. Suffice it to say that the ceremony of the sweat lodge is detailed, complex, sophisticated and highly symbolic ritual. The purification of the bather is its pricipal objective, the readying of the bather for the awesome task of seeking the dream or vision. My helpers, tending the fire and aiding with the stones, were Canka and Cuwignaka.
I did not follow the order of the ritual in all respects nor keep the cerimony in the exactutude of all its details. I would not do this because of reservations on my part, having pimarily to do with skepticism concerning the existance of a medicine world, and because I was not Kaiila. Not being Kaiila I would have felt it improper or irrevenrent, if not dishonest, profane, sacrilegious or blasphemous, to do so. My feelings and decisions in these matters are understood and respected by Canka as well as Cuwignaka. Nonetheless, as one sits alone in the darkened interior of the sweat lodge, with one's head down between one's knees, to keep from fainting and to help stand the heat, one has a great deal of time to think. I do not think that it is a bad idea for a man to be alone sometimes, and to have some time to think. This is a good way, for example, to get to know oneself. Many men, it seems, have never made their own acquaintance. It would not hurt most of us, I suspect, once in a while, to go to a sweat lodge.
After one emerges from the sweat lodge one goes to a stream and washes in the cold water. One cleans, with a knife or sharpened stick, even under one's fingernails. A small fire, of sweet-brush and needles, from needle trees, is then built. One rubs the smoke from this fire into one's body. These things hide the smell of men. It is thought that most medicine helpers do not like the smell of men and if they smell this smell they will be loath to approach. Everything possible is done, of course, to encourage the approach or apperance of the medicine helper.
One goes to the vision place.
It is a high place, and rocky. There are some trees about. One can look down and see the grass below, moving in the wind.
There one fasts. There one waits.
One may drink a little water. It takes a long time to starve to death, weeks. It does not take long, however, to die of thirst. How long it takes to die of thirst varies with many things, with the man, with his bodily activity, with the sunlight or shade, with the winds and the temperatures. But it does not take long. It is a matter of days, usually three or four. It is good, thus, to drink some water.
One waits. One does not know if the medicine helper will come or not.
It is lonely in the vision place.
I lay on my back, looking up at the stars.
They are very beautiful in the Barrens.
The rocks on which I lay were cold and wet. It had rained earlier in the evening.
It is very quiet in the vision place.
