“Yeah and next thing we know, you and I will end up together.” Knox half smirks through his offhand remark.
I stiffen up and feel the anger rise. Heat floods my cheeks and my fingers tighten around my wine glass. “That would be…strange… you know, considering that ten years went by without us so much as saying one word to each other.”
“True. Pops and your parents were rooting for us to hit it off at one point. Remember?”
“I try not to.”
“Well, well.” A guy I’d recognize anywhere bounds over to Knox’s side and throws and arm over his shoulder. He has a beautiful woman with gorgeous red hair on his other arm and a beaming grin on his face. “Isabelle! What a nice surprise. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“Hi Foster. Yes, it has.”
“We need to get the band back together,” he jokes, but I’m not laughing. Knox’s departure also took Foster from me. It’s like our friendship was just by extension, a coincidence because we were only connected because of Knox. He looks over at Knox then back at me. “Lilac and I are about to head out. You two want to come with?”
“Uh, where to?” I ask.
“A club. Or a bar or restaurant somewhere. I’m close to overstaying my welcome in this joint. Join us. There’s lots of room in the limo.”
I’m no party girl. I wouldn’t know what to do or how to act on a dance floor if my life depended on it.
Knox glances at me and instantly reads the hesitation on my face. “You go on ahead, buddy. Isabelle and I are sticking around for a drink. Or a few.”
Foster leans over Knox’s shoulder and flashes me a playful, knowing grin. “You two could never fool me back then.”
I don’t have to ask what he’s talking about. Foster championed the rumor that Knox and I were an item back in high school. He never got that a man and woman could be close without getting it on. Of course, I’m thoroughly aware that Knox’s decision to stay behind has nothing to do with hooking up. We’ve never crossed the line and that won’t change. But it’s a strange thrill to have someone assume we’re more than friends. How can I not feel a little giddy about that? Knox Steele is a man wanted by half the women in the room. I can see the looks coming his way since he approached me. They’re ready to line up for him, but right now, he’s with me. That familiar smugness rising up in my chest feels like old times again.
I throw Foster a naughty wink to give him the wrong idea, and take another drink of my wine. It’s nice to be thought of as the sexy temptress, the vixen. Being the good girl all my life didn’t get me very far, and it sure wasn’t nearly as much fun as I’d wanted. Maybe letting loose is exactly what my life is missing. Things have felt one dimensional and so predictable for so long. But now, Knox is back, and with him, a spark of desire ignites within me. Some fun might be just what I need.
Foster grins as he pats Knox on the arm. “You two lovebirds have fun.”
Knox shakes his head, lips pressed into a thin line as Foster walks away. I can’t help but wish there was some truth to the notion. After he disappeared from my life, I missed what we had so much that all that yearning led to more. Pretty soon after that, I wanted more than just friendship from him. There have been countless moments like this, where all I fantasized about was Knox. He would show up from out of nowhere and beg me to forgive him for leaving me behind. He’d lean in and claim my lips, then ravage my body. But that’s never going to happen. Not the apology, and not the torrid makeout session. As before, his presence is all I get, and it’ll have to be enough. Only now, it doesn’t quite satisfy me in the same way that it did back then.
“Come with me.” Knox’s tone is firm.
“What? Where to?”
That sweet smile I remember crawls up his face. “Somewhere quiet. I want to hear what you’ve been up to.”
“Okay,” I answer, although my agreement is a moot point, given that he’s already taken my hand and is leading me further into the ballroom.
One-on-one time with Knox sounds more risky and dangerous than fun. I just got him back and if I don’t control myself, I’ll lose him just as quickly. The wine has already relaxed my tongue, so I’m liable to say what I think about him abandoning me, and I’ll end up shutting him down. I just hope I can tamp down the butterflies in my stomach and the heat that’s begun to flood my core.
4
Knox
My hands are itching to do more than rest on Isabelle’s shoulder as we sit in a quiet corner outside the main ballroom. A few wait staff have passed by several times with trays filled with glasses of whiskey and flutes of white wine. We haven’t turned them down once. My guess is we’re on our fifth round since we sat here, which leaves me with a lot less interest in being in control than usual. But as I stare into Isabelle’s hazel eyes, as I allow myself to get lost in them, and as I relax and listen to her share what has filled her life since we lost touch, emotions I don’t want to feel expand within my chest. Like regret, shame, and remorse. I want to kick myself. Why did I let ten years pass?
Oh. Right. I know why.
I’m a selfish, arrogant, thoughtless, heartless fucking prick.
Instead of listening to her, I should be groveling for her forgiveness. Instead of sitting here like no time has passed and like our history is a clean slate, I
