Ever since I heard those divine words, my heart has become extremely tender, filled with all kinds of nice thoughts.
Yesterday, the dhobin brought the clothes. She had a severe headache. Earlier, I might have expressed verbal sympathy for her or, at the most, asked the maid to give her a little oil. But yesterday, I felt very agitated. I felt as though she were my sister. I made her sit next to me and rubbed oil on her head for a whole hour. The heavenly joy I felt in doing this cannot be described in words. I felt as if my soul was drawn to her by some strong force. Seeing my behaviour my sister-in-law turned up her nose, but I did not care one bit.
Early this morning, it was extremely cold. My hands and feet were freezing. When Mahari came to work, she was shivering. I was wrapped in a quilt and sitting by the fire. Even then it was extremely uncomfortable for me to expose even a part of my face.
I felt really sad when I saw Mahari. I was ashamed of my conduct. What is the difference between us? The same light illuminates her soul too. I was sitting comfortably by the fire and she was busy carrying out errands for me. Why this injustice? Just because I am the wife of a wealthy man? Is it because my ego had put a veil between us? I didn’t have the courage to think beyond this. I got up, put my woollen shawl over Mahari, took her hand and made her sit by the fire. She was taken aback and said, ‘Bahuji, let me go and do my work. The master will be late for court.’
After that, I put aside my quilt and began washing the dishes with her. That good woman repeatedly tried to dissuade me. My sister-in-law came, watched me with great curiosity, then made a face and left, thinking I was amusing myself. The entire house was thrown into commotion because of this little incident! How selfish we are! We insult the Parmatama. Trapped in the fetters of self-interest we perform all kinds of atrocities on ourselves.Husband
It seems that women simply cannot follow the path of moderation. They resort to extremes. Vrinda, who once attached such importance to her high-caste status and national pride, is now the embodiment of equality and kindness. This is the miraculous result of the simple advice I gave her. Now I too can really be proud of my inspirational powers! I have no objection to her sitting with low-caste women or laughing or talking with them. She could even read aloud to them for their benefit. What I do not like at all is that she should forget herself completely and literally run behind them.
Three days ago, a Chamar came to me, wanting to file a case against his zamindar. No doubt the zamindar had been cruel to him, but it’s not a lawyer’s job to file lawsuits for free. And then to take on a zamindar for the sake of a mere Chamar! Well, would I have built my career if I had practised law like this? Vrinda came to know of his plea. That was it! She kept nagging me to accept the case. These days, she has developed a knack for debating with me frequently. I tried to palm her off by making some excuse or the other, but she would not leave me alone till I had taken the brief. The only result of this has been that for the past three days clients have been lining up at my door, all wanting me to fight their cases for free. I have had to reproach Vrinda several times about this.
This is precisely why ancient scholars did not consider women fit to receive religious instruction. Women just don’t understand that the practical side of every philosophy is different from its theoretical side. We all know that God is just, but does one forget one’s own position while thinking of justice? If we were to bring into practice the idea of universal spirit, then there will really be a kingdom based on equality on earth. But just as the idea of equality has remained an abstract principle and will ever remain so, in the same way, the political principle of equality is unobtainable and will remain so.
We will praise the two ideals loudly and freely and debate and theorize about it. We will even make use of it to strengthen our argument before the public. But it would be impossible to follow it. I didn’t realize that Vrinda would not understand such a simple thing.
Vrinda’s radicalism started becoming unbearable. Today, the same kind of food was cooked for everybody in the kitchen. So far, for the family, fine quality rice was cooked; vegetables were cooked in ghee; milk, butter and fruits were served. For the servants there was always coarse rice, vegetables cooked in oil, and lentils. Milk would not be given to them. This practice has been followed even in very rich families. It is nothing new, and our servants have never complained about this. But today, I saw that Vrinda had cooked the same kind of food for everybody. The servants ate the same food as the members of the family. I was too amazed to say anything.
Vrinda probably thinks that to make a distinction in food is unjust for the servants. What a silly idea! Carried away by her fancy notion of equality, she wants to obliterate the distinction between the nobility and the laity, big and small.
