Ah, that night in the study with James. Yes, life may have been very different now had Papa given his consent to their marriage back then.
‘The proposal came too soon after your mother’s passing and I could not bear losing you at the time. But, I fear I ruined your happiness. We’ve turned you into a drudge when you’re made for finer things.’
‘Do you really think so?’ Tears stung Serena’s eyes. Papa’s words meant so much.
‘Yes, I do. You’ve always been so selfless and thoughtful. You deserve better and I’m sorry we caused you pain. I believe you ought to be free to choose your future now.’
Serena patted her father’s hand and offered a grateful smile, blinking away tears. ‘One day, perhaps. But for now, I am happy to stay here.’
‘You are a good girl. I am fortunate to be the father of such wonderful young lasses.’
There was no use remaining angry with her father or sisters. Serena was the fortunate one, surrounded by family who loved and appreciated her, even if they showed it in odd ways.
Two days later, as Serena was putting bread in the oven, a knock came at the front door. The door creaked as it opened and the low murmur of voices met her ears.
Serena closed the oven door quietly, straining to hear who the visitor might be, and wiped the traces of flour from her hands. That loaf promised to be mouth-watering.
Moments later, Papa called her name. Who would visit me?
After tucking stray tresses of hair into her chignon, she made her way to the front, pressing her skirts and twisting her bodice so she did not appear too dishevelled. To her surprise, Mr Xavier Jones stood in the open doorway, fidgeting with a hat in his hands.
‘Mr Xavier!’ Serena could not hide her astonishment. After being sent away, he was the last person she expected to visit.
Mr Xavier’s mouth stretched into what she assumed was an attempt at a smile, but he only succeeded at a nervous grimace. ‘Good afternoon, Miss Bellingham.’ He dipped his head. ‘I wondered if you might accompany me on a short walk. Just to the corner and back.’
Mr Xavier must have something of import to discuss, for the corner was mere minutes away. Certainly not enough time for a social call, and even less for courtship.
Serena shifted her gaze to Papa who nodded. ‘I shall keep an eye on the bread, lass.’
Serena turned back to Mr Xavier and bobbed a curtsey. ‘Let me collect a shawl and hat.’
With the thin garment draped around her shoulders and her golden locks under the charge of a bonnet, Serena strolled along the street with Mr Xavier. The familiar sounds of wheels grinding on the earthy street, and the ever-present scent of brine on the air, kept her grounded as she walked. Sneaking a sideways glance at him, she noted he appeared solemn, making him almost identical in looks to his uncle. This revelation sent a tingle up and down Serena’s spine as memories of Edward flashed through her mind.
Mr Xavier seemed reluctant to talk, so Serena tried to start a conversation. ‘How are things at Aleron?’
‘All is well,’ he said. But then his face twisted into a grimace. ‘That is, all is not well, to be honest.’
Serena stopped walking and turned to face him. ‘What has happened?’
‘It’s not so much as what has happened, but what has not happened.’ After uttering this obscure reply, Mr Xavier continued walking, forcing Serena to follow.
‘My uncle has not improved.’
‘Mr King?’
‘Of course. We thought ... believed ...’ He let out a frustrated sigh. ‘May I be candid with you, Miss Bellingham?’
‘I don’t see why you shouldn’t.’
‘You may not appreciate what I have to say.’
Serena pressed her lips together, remembering other things this family had said that had not pleased her. ‘I am sure I shall survive. Be as candid as you wish.’ Mr Xavier clasped his hands together behind his back and slowed his strides. ‘We hoped your absence might help Uncle Ed’s mind settle. After all, we—they—were convinced your presence made him overwrought in the beginning.’
‘But you don’t agree?’ Serena realised he’d used the word ‘they’.
Mr Xavier dropped his gaze for a moment. ‘I have always considered you good for Uncle Ed; you have a way with him. I suppose that is why they chose me to come and visit today.’
‘Oh. I see.’
Suddenly stopping, he turned and gripped her forearms with an impassioned plea in his eyes. ‘Please believe me when I say everything we do we are sure is for my uncle’s best, but sometimes we make mistakes. And, it seems, sending you away was one of those mistakes.’
‘So, what is it you want from me? To return with you?’ Serena’s heart rate leapt to double its normal pace, gently wrenching her arms from his grip.
‘He is begging for you. Uncle Ed flew into a rage when he discovered your absence—never mind that Mother told him it was her fault—and since then has fallen into a deep melancholy. He refuses to eat or get out of his bed and he swears he would rather die if you do not come back. So, you see, he has left us with little choice. Mother is beside herself, although she is the only one who doesn’t want you to return, and Simon is ...’ he left the sentence unfinished, but his eyes spoke volumes. ‘You know how Simon is.’
Serena knew all too well. What would the atmosphere be like if she returned? Could she, in fact, help Edward’s state of mind? Or would her presence make him even worse?
For some strange reason, her heart pounded for Edward. He was sick and he needed her and now, she was surprised to realise, his needs outweighed those of her family. And, hadn’t they done well while she was gone before?
Breathless, she looked up into Mr Xavier’s eyes. ‘I
