*****
The next day Sonia sent a note to Robert to meet him in the afternoon, at her cousin Horatia’s, because she knew Horatia always gave them a little space to talk. Then she dressed in a yellow dress with brown stripes which she knew looked good. She told Charlotte to help her with a nice hairstyle. Sonia wanted to look her very best for the marquess because on that depended him wanting to help her.
Later that day in Horatia’s house Sonia anxiously waited for Robert’s arrival. It didn’t take him long to arrive and as always he looked very handsome. He greeted everyone present and walked to where she was.
“Miss Hearst.” Robert bowed and kissed her hand. In front of Sonia he had no objection to speaking with a certain familiarity, but before Horatia and her husband the viscount he had to keep the formalities. Although he knew that once they were alone, they could speak less formally.
“Lord Wilmington, I’m glad to see you again.”
“I feel the same. If I may say so every time I see you, you are more beautiful.”
Sonia smiled. “Thank you.”
While everyone was talking about the climate, the political situation, the upcoming dances and even the hunting season. Sonia only thought about how she would explain everything to Robert.
Horatia seemed to understand this and a short while later she invented an excuse to leave them alone for a moment to talk. When at last there was no one else in the room Robert approached the chair where Sonia sat. “Sonia, I can see that something is worrying you.”
“Yes, there is something I want to talk to you about but I don’t want you to think bad about me after this.”
“I do not think that could happen. You seem to be an exceptional woman and I have the best opinion of you.”
“Maybe that will change, but I must tell you anyway,” Sonia took a deep breath. “We have spoken many times about the fact that I don’t wish to marry and we have made jokes about it.”
“It’s true and you also know that I wanted to ask for your hand in marriage but I respected your way of thinking. Although, I do not share it.”
“Well, my brother thinks that it is time to choose someone and I don’t know what to do.”
Robert took her hand. “Sonia this time would come sooner or later.”
“I know, but I don’t want to get married,” Sonia said mortified, “and the only thing I can do is pretend.”
“I do not understand you.”
She stood up from the chair and began to walk around the room. “I thought I never wanted to get married and if my father has an attack for that he’ll have to get a good doctor. Instead, I want to live alone, peaceful without anyone who wants to impose his will on me. But I don’t want to live my existence without knowing how it is to be with a man.”
Robert almost swallowed his tongue in surprise. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me, Robert.”
“I don’t want a man to tell me what to do, but I want to know what intimacy is.”
“What are you thinking of doing? You know that if you do that, you will lose your reputation and every possibility of being in society. Even if you don’t marry, you will lose the respect of all and you will be an outcast in London. A pariah with money but an undesirable person in all the social events and houses of the nobles.”
“I don’t care.”
“You’ll care, my dear. You may not believe it now, but you will.”
“And if he were someone we know?” Sonia looked at him. “Someone handsome, from a good family and discreet enough not to say anything.”
“Have you thought of anyone in particular?”
“The only one that comes to mind is you,” Sonia said matter-of-factly.
Robert did not know what to answer, but he could not believe what the mischievous woman was suggesting.
“Sonia, my dear,” he said. “I do not think that is a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“I am a man of strong passions and you are an innocent girl.”
“I don’t care,” Sonia said quickly.
Robert thought it was funny that he loved Sonia’s spirit and her urge to conquer the world, but he knew that it would not end well. After a few weeks of getting to know her, he felt some affection for her. She was an original young woman, creative and to some extent innocent. Then he said, “Why not?” Maybe it was a very selfish way of thinking, but before another more cunning man came up with something outlandish or accepted her scandalous offer, he preferred to do so. She would be an excellent marchioness. Her beauty, character, and elegance left no doubt but he would change the terms of this agreement a little with her, only she would not know.
Maybe with time, she would know him more and he could make her fall in love with him and in that way convince her to stay with him. He was sure that over time the absurd idea of staying alone would be erased from her mind.
“Very well. I accept your proposal.”
Sonia looked at him in amazement. “Really?”
“Is that not what you wanted?”
“Yes, of course, but I didn’t think you’d accept so soon.”
“What man in his right mind would say no?”
Sonia didn’t know what to say. In that moment she didn’t know if she had done things very fast and maybe it was not what she wanted. It was said that Robert was a passionate man and that before going to war, there were many
