“Well, members of the PTA,” she said in a voice ringing with good cheer and enthusiasm, “the sixth grade hopes you’ve enjoyed their little original surprise this evening. They know it isn’t exactly what Shakespeare had in mind for his balcony scene, but they had lots of fun with it, and hope you did, too. Thank you.”
The PTA was probably too stunned at first to do much but sit there glassy-eyed. Then two or three parents started to clap, and finally they all began to clap. I guess I would have to say they just about brought the house down. Later, when everyone was milling around, I heard comments such as, “very humorous,” “pretty clever,” “really contemporary.”
Mr. Dorking, though, stood looking as if he didn’t know what had hit him. While milling around with everyone else, I managed to break away from my parents and mill myself over to Miss Blossom.
“May I have a word with you, Miss Blossom?” I asked. “I know this isn’t the time or the place, but I have a homework question.”
“Any time or place is the right time or place when it concerns homework, Rupert,” said Miss Blossom, smiling sweetly. We put several yards between the nearest PTA members and ourselves.
“What do you make of the whole thing, Miss Blossom?” I asked under my breath.
“What I make of it, Rupert,” she replied, “is that dimwit Dorking couldn’t come up with anything better than the twisted tongue bewitchment. I knew it the moment the first words came out of your mouth. It’s one of the simplest bewitchments going. He cast a spell on the punch served to the class.”
“But it didn’t taste any different to me, Miss Blossom,” I said. “Just plain old grape.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Rupert,” said Miss Blossom. “You can’t taste a spell. Well, perhaps in strawberry, but never in grape. But, fortunately, I had with me a few of your basic emergency anti-bewitching aids, and while you were onstage, I dipped into the janitor’s closet to perform the appropriate hocus-pocus.”
“So that’s where you were!” I said. “But how did you manage to—um—unbewitch all of us the moment the curtain was closed?”
“Nothing to it,” replied Miss Blossom. “All I had to do was sprinkle … but we haven’t time to go into that here, Rupert. I just want to warn you that I don’t believe this is what Saturna had in mind for you and the sixth grade. She must have had a mental lapse when she agreed to any surprise spell from that dumbbell Dorking. Well, she’ll be surprised all right when he tells her what actually happened.”
“What if he doesn’t tell her?” I asked.
“Oh, he’ll tell her, all right,” said Miss Blossom. “He’ll have to.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Vibrations,” replied Miss Blossom. “Or witch’s vibes, as we call them. How do you suppose I knew you might be in the kind of trouble where my expertise was needed? Vibrations, Rupert, vibrations! Saturna’s vibrations will tell her that her brother fell on his handsome face, so he might as well confess what happened.”
“Well, what are we going to do about it, Miss Blossom?” I asked.
“Check computowitch.com,” replied Miss Blossom grimly “I’m coming back here later tonight to pay a visit to the computer room myself. Then we’ll both be checking it. We’ll compare notes tomorrow. But I expect that at midnight tonight, when Saturna learns how that lamebrained brother of hers has fallen on his gorgeous nose, the fur will fly. She’ll be furious—and even more dangerous!”
I didn’t like the sound of this at all. I had been hoping the worst was over, but it looked as if it was just beginning! At that moment, though, I did have another minor problem on my mind. “Miss Blossom,” I said, “what am I going to say to my parents about what happened tonight? What are any of the sixth graders going to say to their parents?”
“No need to say anything,” replied Miss Blossom. “By the time everyone leaves Pepperdine tonight, no one but you, and of course Pepperdine’s beloved principal, will remember that anything out of the ordinary went on. The sixth grade will think everything happened just as they rehearsed it, and the parents will believe that’s what they saw. It’s all part of the anti-bewitchment package. Now, you’d better run along—and get a good night’s sleep. You have to be ready for your math test tomorrow.”
Math test! Now just how was I supposed to be thinking about a math test when I knew a furious Saturna was still out there dangerous and armed with witchcraft!
13
Not Your Usual Mode of Transportation
Naturally, as soon as I arrived home, got rid of the leotards, and reported to the pets all that had happened, I turned on my computer. But computo-witch.com still had the same old stuff on it. Miss Blossom was right. There probably wouldn’t be anything until midnight. After all, Saturna might well have been vibrating away up there on Witch’s Mountain, but until she got the specifics from Grodork, there wouldn’t be much to hurl back at him.
As I suspected, it was almost impossible keeping my mind on grammar homework and studying for a math test with everything else I had on my mind. I was also pretty wiped out from being Romeo and the other evening’s events. But every time my head started to droop, I felt a sharp peck on my cheek. Good old Fred knew I wanted to stay awake long enough to try computowitch.com again at midnight.
Midnight finally arrived, and I didn’t lose any time in turning my computer back on. Unfortunately, only half of my brain was awake, the wrong half. I typed in the word “computowitch” as usual, but then stopped to sleepily, and
