“May I have some ice chips?”
He picked up the bowl holding the chips and placed one in my mouth.
“Thank you.”
Ryan waited until the chip melted and I swallowed before placing another on my tongue. When I swallowed again, he asked, “Would you like more?”
I shook my head. “Ryan, you know nothing about me—”
“I know all I need to know, Sarah.”
“No. What I told you about me is all made up. None of it was true.” I felt a sudden urge to come clean. Either he’d understand how I felt or he wouldn’t. If it ended our relationship, it was a helluva lot better now.
“Sarah, what are you talking about?”
I told Ryan everything, including the foster homes I’d been forced to live in. How miserably I was treated by the other kids, identifying with Cinderella many times over. I wasn’t certain which abuse was worse, the physical or the emotional. It took a great many years of counseling to get it behind me. Luckily for me, the last foster home I was in had been investigated by the state and lost its credentials. A caring social worker made certain I got the help I needed, or else I might have become one of those throwaway people you see living on the streets—if you can call that living.
Pity was written all over his face. That was the one emotion I hated the most. I wrapped up my charming childhood story by telling him exactly how I felt. “So you see, Ryan, all my life I wanted to be someone else. I would look into the mirror every morning wishing I’d see a prettier face. I guess I never expected to bump into a guy who took a dare to see if he could get into my pants, or whatever the hell the damn bet was, and fall in love. My mistake was to even think that a handsome guy like you would ever want some plain-Jane sister like me.”
“You couldn’t be more wrong or blind,” Ryan replied, shaking his head. “Aside from being physically attractive with your soulful doe eyes that make me melt each time you look at me, and your soft, plush lips, you’ve got a natural beauty that radiates from within. Ms. Librarian, one only has to open the book to see it. I’m proud to be seen with you by my side.”
I was speechless. I was too busy translating the meaning of what he’d just said. It had sounded like music to my ears. He took my silence as an opportunity to continue.
“Sarah, I don’t care what you did or didn’t do in your past. You rose above it all and made something of yourself. You didn’t let it destroy you then. Don’t let it destroy the beautiful thing we have between us now. I beg you.” He touched my hand. Heat seared the spot.
“I’d love to believe you, but I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. I can’t do anything about your past, but I can certainly make sure your future is a happy one. Just give me some time to show you. Better still…I dare you.”
The silent tears began to slip from my eyes again and I turned away. Ryan gently cupped my chin and turned my head. Then he softly dabbed away the wetness with a tissue.
“Let me love you, Sarah Williams. That’s all I ask.”
In the end, my heart won the battle. I loved Ryan and I wanted to have his baby. I knew it would be a beautiful one. And perhaps our child would inherit my love for books. Besides, I had to give Ryan the chance. After all, he’d dared me.
DANGEROUS ATTRACTION
I watched my mother in the mirror as she brushed my strawberry-blond hair, making it shimmer like gold in the light. “You’ll be turning heads one day, Kayla. Just don’t go batting your baby blues and losing yours over the wrong man.”
“I won’t, Mama, I promise,” I said, not quite understanding what she meant or the irony of her words.
The sweet memory faded, and I was back in the present staring out of the grimy window of a Greyhound bus heading for Las Vegas. I had turned eighteen last week and had scraped together nearly every cent I had for the bus fare. I didn’t think Mama would mind me going. It freed up some room in the trailer. Besides, she had to be blind not to notice things hadn’t been exactly wonderful for me there in Arizona lately. I was tired of fighting off her dates. I didn’t blame her, since it wasn’t really her fault. I guess men just naturally seemed to have wandering eyes—and hands.
To be honest, the real reason I left was Jimmy. Jim Grant was a smooth-talking, slow-handed, two-timing, six-foot-two bastard with whom I’d fallen in love and now so desperately wanted to forget. Ignoring my wishes, my subconscious conjured up his handsome face and forced my memory to replay the last beautiful night we’d shared together.
It had been a sweltering August night when he knocked on the door of our trailer, looking so fine in his black T, which emphasized his hard-muscled chest. Jimmy had been able to make me nearly cream my pants from the moment I’d first met him at my friend Dee’s graduation party. There’d been something about him…from the way he filled his jeans to his handsome face. I’d dreamed of being with him. And when he noticed me, my life took on new meaning. That night, we were alone together and nature was about to take its course.
Mama had let him in, and the three of us sat around the kitchen table gabbing and drinking cold beer. Jimmy and I took off when Mama’s date showed up. We headed for a small bar in Apache Junction, not far from the
