Finally her crying ceased and sleep once again took over. Damien had to come back here, it was his home. Besides, he had promised her.
It was the return of his body warmth that woke her for the second time that night, the feel of being enfolded in strong muscular arms and held firmly against his hair-roughened chest. With a sigh she cuddled against him and drifted back to sleep.
It was daylight when she woke again, still encircled in his arms. Damien slept on, his harsh, often cynical features appearing younger in his relaxed state. Suddenly his green eyes flickered open and she found herself gazing into their sleepy depths.
She blushed at the warmth of his gaze. ‘Good morning,’ she greeted him shyly.
He watched her intently. ‘Is it?’
She gave a nervous laugh. ‘Well, I can’t speak for the weather, it seems to have been raining all night.’
‘But it seems a good morning to you other than that?’
‘I—I suppose so.’ She was very much aware that under the bedclothes he was as naked as she was.
His eyes never left her flushed face and he smoothed her hair back as she leant above him. ‘I’ve been a bloody fool about you, haven’t I?’ he murmured softly.
She felt the old panic returning. ‘What do you mean?’ Surely he couldn’t be tired of her after only one night together! She knew she was inexperienced, but she would soon learn. Everyone had to start somewhere.
‘When I left here last night I went to see James,’ he told her calmly.
Kate recoiled away from him. ‘What did you do that for?’
Damien swung his legs out of the bed, standing to don his robe. He tied the belt firmly, his long brown legs protruding from its knee-length. He shook his head. ‘You should have told me, Kate, should have made me shut my foul mouth.’ He looked thoroughly disgusted with himself, the lines of strain about his mouth and nose deeply etched into his skin.
‘James told—he told you?’ She swallowed hard.
‘He had no choice. I would have knocked it out of him if necessary.’
‘But how did you— Why did you—’
He moved about the room with fierce controlled movements. ‘As soon as I’d made love to you I knew there was something wrong with my theory about you. I was your first lover,’ he said harshly. ‘After you’d lived with James for two years I knew there had to be something you were hiding from me. I knew there could be nothing wrong with his manhood, he and Sheri appear to be happily married.’
‘They are.’
‘I know that,’ he said impatiently. ‘When you fell asleep last night I lay here in the dark trying to work out what was going on. None of my answers seemed to be the right one. James seemed to be the key to the whole thing, so I went and asked him.’
Kate watched him from the bed, aware that he was angry, but whether at her or not she couldn’t yet tell. ‘You could have asked me,’ she pointed out.
‘I wasn’t sure you would give me the answers I wanted. James wasn’t too willing at first, apparently he didn’t think it was any of my business.’
‘I would have told you sooner or later, Damien. But it isn’t something one goes around talking about. But I was going to tell you, you’re my husband, you have a right to know.’
He nodded his head grimly. ‘Yes, I’m your husband. How do you feel about that? Do you want to leave me?’
Her eyes widened. ‘Leave you? Why should I want to leave you? The fact that you now know James is my brother doesn’t make the slightest difference to our marriage—unless you dislike my illegitimacy?’ It was a possibility that had never occurred to her. Some people wouldn’t be able to accept such a thing, maybe Damien was one of those people.
‘Why should that bother me, you little fool? I thought you might want to leave me because you couldn’t bear to live with me any longer, now that you know what a selfish idiot I am.’ He closed his eyes as if to shut out some inner pain. ‘I’m not even sure I can live with myself any more.’
‘I don’t understand.’
He looked at her in wonderment. ‘No, I don’t believe you do. Kate, last night I took your innocence from you. I more or less forced you to marry me, played on the fact that I could arouse you. I’ve mocked you, scorned you, insulted you at every turn. The fact that you don’t hate me, don’t appear to hate me, comes as something of a shock to me. Do you hate me?’
‘You must know I don’t,’ she answered huskily, unable to look at him.
‘And you don’t want to leave me?’
She shook her head. ‘No.’
He sat down on the bed, gently lifting her chin to look at her. ‘You’ll stay with me? Let me try to make amends?’
‘I won’t leave until you tell me to go.’
‘That will be never!’ He held her to him, his arms wholly possessive. ‘I don’t deserve a second chance with you, I don’t deserve anything from you. But I love you, Kate. I think I must have been half out of my head with love for you to be able to think those things of you. Anyone can see you’re sweet, and good, and much too perfect to be married to me.’
‘You love me?’ she squeaked. ‘But—but when …’
‘For ever, I think,’ he answered her unfinished question. ‘Certainly since the day I came to see James and heard you tell him you loved him. I saw red when I heard you say that to him. I knew then that I wanted to be the one you said that to, the only one. But my stupid damned pride got in the way. I wanted you for my own, but because you’re the only woman I’ve ever loved I wanted to be the first with
