‘I didn’t want to worry you.’
I left it for a minute, and finished another beer before I told him, ‘The next time I get a business enterprise going I think I’ll offer you part of it.’
‘Why, Charlie?’
‘I like your style. I like the way you anticipate me.’
He smiled, and shook his head.
‘Thank you, Charlie, and when the time comes I’ll think about it . . . but don’t be offended if I turn you down. I might have bigger plans.’
Soon after that we went in and joined Yassine at the bar. There were two belly dancers. David always knew where to get the best dancers.
It was three days before Watson had me in. His little mind games didn’t bother me because, in truth, he had rather a little mind . . . it was like playing chess with an ungifted child. He telegraphed his moves miles ahead, but the trouble was that he always had the big battalions on his side, so he usually won.
‘Settling in, Charles?’ Charles?
‘Yes, sir. No problem, sir.’
‘Sit down.’
‘Yessir. At attention or at ease, sir?’
‘Stop being a prat, Charlie.’
‘Then don’t treat me like one, sir.’
‘Are you going to tag sir onto every damned thing you say?’
‘It’s what you wanted, sir. If I don’t, you’ll sling me in the cooler again, sir.’
‘Then damned well stop it. It’s unnatural – coming from you, that is.’
‘That’s what I think too.’
I pulled out a chair, and slouched opposite him across the desk. I knew that would get to him. He had two small piles of message flimsies in front of him. I was reminded of my interviews in the FO, and sensed a rocket coming on. He asked me, ‘You know what these are, but do you know why they’re sitting on my desk?’
‘Spontaneous reproduction? I have no way of knowing.’
‘Why are you always a smart-arse when I am preparing to be nice to you? You always have to spoil it.’
‘I know. Bad breeding. Sorry, what are they for?’
‘To show you, that’s what. The big heap on the left is your intercepts for the last three days. The small one, on the right, is what your predecessors, between them, achieved in three weeks. Every time the Saudis flipped the signal they lost it and peed their shorts. You didn’t – you followed them, and picked them up again. For all the radio users out there, you are, in some ways, a very worrying little man. Her Majesty will be very pleased you’re on our side.’
‘I still don’t see your point . . .’ I sulked.
‘The point is, Charlie, that whenever you bellyache and ask me what you’re doing out here, I’m going to wave these two piles of sheets under your nose, and tell you that you’re doing rather well, and that the Boss Class is very pleased with you.’
‘I got away from you in order to get away from the Boss Class. I hate it.’
‘I know. That’s why I’m really enjoying having you back under my command.’
‘You’re a sadist.’
‘Stop moaning, and get us a couple of drinks from the cupboard. I’m sure you remember which one.’
There was an unlabelled quart bottle of greasy-looking clear stuff in his drinks cupboard. He had me pour two half-tumblers’ full, and had me sip one. It was like paint stripper; I probably pulled a face. Then he topped up each glass with cold water, and the mixed fluids went cloudy. I tried it again, and fell in love. Liquid aniseed balls. Probably the most refreshing pick-me-up I’d ever come across.
‘Ouzo,’ he told me. ‘Greek stuff. Bloody marvellous, isn’t it? We’ll have to sort out this bloody island without getting rid of all the Greeks – it would be a tragedy if I lost my source of this.’
I had to get him back on track. He hadn’t called me in to say thank you, and give me a drink.
‘What else did you have in mind for me, boss? There’s always a something else, and your last one almost killed me.’
‘Nothin’ much.’ He sniffed, and squinted at me through his drink. ‘I don’t know why you’re bothered. Remember the Canal Zone? Piece of piss.’
Of course I remembered the bleeding Canal Zone. As well as getting shot on an unscheduled trip to Turkey, I had nearly been killed by a yellow fever jab in Port Said, and stalked by a lion . . . and he’d sent me on several desert patrols with the Brown Jobs, earwigging radio traffic from both the Israelis and the Egyptians. It had been uncomfortable and dangerous. Not at all like being in the Boy Scouts. And I didn’t even get a proficiency badge for it.
‘Yes.’ A cautious yes. ‘Of course.’ A cautious of course.
‘How about some of the same? A bit of this and a bit of that?’
‘With the Brown Jobs?’
‘Yes, if they ask.’
‘Do they ask?’
‘Sometimes. In your case they’re bound to – word has already got about.’
‘What kind of word?’
‘They’re saying we have a wizard W/Op on the books. Wizard W/Op – that’s not bad. Is it?’
‘Do you really expect me to go chasing all over the island with the army, listening in for something that helps them deal with their terrorists?’
After a long pause he said, ‘Not often, and not officially . . . but yes.’ Bollocks. ‘Anything else on your mind?’
‘I heard you had a new girl. I rather liked the old one, but we’ll let that pass – what’s the new one like?’
He looked over my shoulder at the door in his shed which concealed his assistant’s office. It was ajar. I’d always suspected that it was where the real work was done. Watson called out, ‘I know that you’re listening, cow. Come out and meet Charlie. He wants to see you,’ and an Amazon walked into the room.
Pat blagged his way past the lieutenant at lunchtime, and flopped into the seat alongside me. I held up my hand to
