The following Saturday night Matt turned up at the fish and chip shop. Zara hadn’t arrived for her shift and Leanne was pretty annoyed because it was a particularly busy night. She’d barely had time to inquire about Kevin’s wellbeing before the shop began filling with hungry people.
Matt appeared when I was in the middle of taking an order from a freshly showered young farmer smelling of soap and powerful deodorant. Matt stood there for a second, looking through the door at me, as if trying to decide whether or not to come in.
‘Just hang on a sec,’ I said to the guy, laying down the order book and rushing out the back. Leanne was at the bench cutting up salad for the dinner rush.
‘Any sign of Zara?’ she said, slicing tomatoes with the speed of a master chef.
‘No, not yet.’ I went over to the mirror near the small sink where we washed our hands. I leant close and examined my face.
‘What’s the matter?’ Leanne said. ‘Shouldn’t you be serving?’ I heard the chopping stop.
‘Oh, I’ve got something in my eye,’ I lied, rubbing away blotches of mascara.
‘Want me to help?’
‘No, it’s okay, I’ve got it.’ I pretended to inspect my eye, then tidied my hair as best I could and patted the sweat from my upper lip. I stared at my reflection. What was I doing? Matt wasn’t going to start liking me again, just like that. He probably just wanted some fish and chips.
I went out to the counter and took the customer’s order, noting that Matt had sat at a table at the back of the shop near the drinks fridges. He looked over and smiled – a good sign. I gave a small wave and gestured to him that I’d be a minute.
I clipped the order to the rack for Leanne and, wiping my hands on my apron, went over to Matt. My heart was doing some sort of weird pitter-patter, which was unnerving and made me feel light-headed. Why did bodies always fail you when you needed them?
‘I didn’t know you did table service,’ he said.
‘We don’t, but do you want something? I can get the order book.’ I pointed to the counter.
‘No, I was kidding. I’ve already eaten.’
‘Oh.’
‘So,’ he said, looking up at me.
‘So …’
‘I came to see you.’
‘Oh, I see. I thought … well, you didn’t answer my texts. So …’
Just then the door tinkled and Zara and Kayla came in.
‘Hang on, I’ve got to sort this out,’ I said.
Matt glanced at the girls and gave me a small nod. ‘Okay.’
Zara lifted her hand and gave me a guilty smile as I strode up to her.
‘Where have you been?’ I demanded.
Kayla looked at me stony-faced and didn’t bother to say hello.
Zara turned toward the kitchen. ‘Is Leanne here?’
‘Yes, of course. What happened? We’ve been really busy.’
‘I’m sorry about the other night. I feel terrible,’ Zara said as we went behind the counter. ‘You shouldn’t have gone home by yourself.’
Sure, it was easy to say now. But for a second I actually thought she meant it. ‘It’s okay,’ I said, not wanting to get into it again.
Leanne came out of the kitchen with a tray of salad. ‘Zara. About time,’ she said, squeezing past us. ‘I need some help out the back.’
‘Actually,’ said Zara. ‘I came to tell you I won’t be working here anymore.’
Leanne stopped and looked over her shoulder. ‘Really? Well there’s an invention called a telephone, you know.’
‘I’m sorry. I meant to come earlier but Mum wouldn’t drive me in.’
‘So, what’s the problem?’ said Leanne, sliding the tray into the glassed front counter.
‘Um,’ Zara looked at me. ‘It’s just, I’m not really cut out for it.’
‘Sunny,’ Leanne said, getting a little flustered, and pointing at the counter, ‘there’s someone waiting.’
Kayla had lined up and there were two others behind her.
‘Sorry.’ I hurried past Leanne and Zara, disappointed I wasn’t going to hear the rest of the conversation.
‘Just these,’ Kayla said, pushing two bottles of water toward me.
I took Kayla’s money, keeping one eye on Zara and Leanne. They spoke in low voices, then Zara came over and took her bottle of water from Kayla.
‘I guess I’ll see you around, Sunny,’ she said.
‘Will you? You’re quitting.’
‘Yeah, but I’ll still see you.’
‘Are we getting fish and chips or not?’ said Kayla.
‘Yeah, I guess,’ said Zara, still looking at me. ‘Can we have two serves of fish and chips, please?’
‘Takeaway,’ I said. It was more of a statement than a question.
‘Uh, yes.’
‘No, have here,’ said Kayla. ‘I’ll get a table.’ Zara shrugged as Kayla wandered outside to a vacant table on the footpath.
‘So, the job’s too much for you?’ I said.
‘Well, sort of. I don’t really like it and Mum didn’t want to do the drive.’
‘Wasn’t it your mum’s idea in the first place?’
Zara crumbled. ‘It’s not me, Sunny, okay. It’s Mum. She said it would be better, just until this thing about Kevin and Dylan blows over. She’s a control freak.’
‘Right.’ My brain froze as the meaning of her words hit me.
‘It’s stupid. I know all this has nothing to do with you. Even if Kevin did—’
‘So, she’s afraid I might rub off on you, is she? Doesn’t want you associating with criminals.’
‘I swear, Sunny. If it was up to me … I mean, I don’t care about all that.’
I nodded, feeling like I’d been punched in the stomach.
‘We can still be friends. Mum doesn’t need to know. She—’
My defences kicked in. ‘It doesn’t matter. I won’t be around anyway.’
‘What?’
I shrugged. ‘I’m leaving Kelly’s Crossing. My real dad asked me to come and live with him.’ What in God’s name was I saying?
‘Really? That’s cool.’ She frowned.
‘He has a great house in Brisbane.’
‘That’s great, Sunny. I’m happy for you.’ Her smile trembled a little.
‘Don’t say anything to anyone, though,’ I added as an afterthought. ‘I haven’t told Kevin yet.’
‘Why not?’
‘I will soon, but, just don’t say anything, okay? You
