I consult the index, then flip to foundational principle of values number thirty-nine, which states that Chingu, the oracular monkey and earthly vessel of heavenly enlightenment, is never incorrect. Her oracles are always presumed true, though the interpretation may be inaccurate. Thus, if Chingu makes an oracle identifying a criminal, it’s presumed to be valid proof to satisfy statute 547 unless the criminal can show that the interpretation was flawed.
So that’s how it’s going to happen. It’s strange to see in this book in my hands an oracle of how I’m going to take Suki down. I snap the book shut with satisfaction.
After White Hour, before class at the Conservatory of Music, Suki and the House of Flowering Blossoms girls skate to me. They’ve adorned their academy robes with hundreds of luminescent, feathery, gold scales that wave and shimmer as they move. They look as if they’re being eaten alive by a school of goldfish. Sensei Madame Yao has not arrived yet, so the girls see their chance to squeeze in some abuse. Since Doi’s not in class today, I’m the target.
“So,” begins Suki, “have you decided which structure you’re going to attack next, Stealthiest Skater in Shin?”
“Oh, Suki, is that you under all that gold?” I ask. “I thought someone was being attacked by a gingko tree.”
“Wah, so she’s an expert on fashion now! In prison, you’ll be able to wear the latest fashions made out of discarded turnip sacks.”
“You should know,” I say, “that I intend to consult Chingu, the oracular monkey, and ask her who is attacking the structures of Pearl Famous. Enjoy your last few days at the academy, Suki. You had some talent, but you had more hatefulness.”
“Is that supposed to scare me? Make me die of laughing!” She giggles behind her hand, sending waves fluttering through the gold scales on her robe.
Sensei Madame Yao arrives, and so the insults end there. It would have felt good to deliver a last slice.
* * *
That afternoon, I visit Sagacious Monk Goom and Chingu. They live in a little temple on pillars rising directly out of the water off the southeast edge of the Principal Island.
I knock the suspended pole against the bell hanging outside of the front door to the temple. I immediately hear the sound of shrieking from within.
Sagacious Monk Goom opens the door. “Very nice. Very nice.”
Inside, Chingu is seated on top of a sort of great box, large enough to seat two people inside, made of ornate pearl lacquer carved with maps of stars. She’s screeching as if she’s being boiled alive, hacking at the box with her cleaver, and baring her fangs at us.
“Venerable holy Sagacious Monk Goom,” I say, bowing. “Ten thousand obeisances of gratitude for the honor of granting me an audience with you.”
“Nice.”
“I have never been received by so holy a man.”
“Very nice.”
“The students of Pearl Famous Academy of Skate and Sword are so fortunate to have so evolved a being, who almost received the bolt of enlightenment himself, serving as our spiritual counselor. How did we deserve such good fortune?”
“You’re my punishment for messing it up.”
I don’t know what to say to this.
“Do you have any money I can borrow?” he asks.
“Ah, venerable holy Sagacious Monk Goom,” I say. “I wish to consult Chingu, the oracular monkey.”
“Mmm. I see. Are you sure you don’t have any money I can borrow?”
“Alas, venerable holy Sagacious Monk Goom, I do not,” I say.
He lets out a great sigh. “You students never do. What do you know about consulting Chingu, the oracular monkey?”
“The asker enters the box with Chingu and takes her hand. She falls into a trance, the asker asks the question, she chooses three tiles from a set of sixty-lucky, and the logograms on the tiles form the fortune. The asker’s personal meditation on the meaning of the three logograms yields revelation and the oracle.”
“Ah, but you’ll need my assistance, won’t you? What’s your question for Chingu?” I don’t know why he wants to hear my question, but I know scheming when I see it.
I bow and say, “Ten thousand obeisances of gratitude. But I understand that questions that one asks Chingu are very personal, spiritual matters. And that every student has the right to consult Chingu privately.”
His face goes sour. “Sounds like we like to read the academy rules, don’t we? But all oracles benefit from interpretation. I can interpret it for you. For a small fee.”
“I roll in waves of gratitude for your generosity, but I will struggle with the mysteries of the oracle alone.”
I imagine that if you blow on a bear’s nose, it’d look like how Sagacious Monk Goom looks.
“Suit yourself,” he says. “Yet Chingu doesn’t answer questions so easily. Sometimes Chingu is very nice. And sometimes she’s only nice.”
When we look over at her, she hisses at us like a viper.
“You see. Today, she’s only nice.” Chingu’s protests rise to such viciousness that she chokes and coughs out something into her hand, which she smells and eats.
“Chingu needs a nice treat before she can answer questions,” says Sagacious Monk Goom.
“What kind of treat?” I ask.
“Red sorghum wine.”
He’s a fraud and a cheat, but he’s standing between me and Chingu. “I make obeisances in all directions for the honor of your audience, venerable holy Sagacious Monk Goom. I will return with red sorghum wine for y—for Chingu, the oracular monkey.”
“Mmm. Very nice.”
“May we meet here in the New Year.”
“May we meet here in Pearl.”
I skate backward and exit the temple.
If I want to get some wine, I’ll have to break academy rules and escape into the city. There, I’ll have to find someone willing to break the law and sell wine to a luckyteen-year-old girl.
The last thing I need now is to be caught breaking rules and laws. But that nasty little monkey has the evidence I need to prove that Suki has been setting me up. Rules
