“Is that what you are going to tell them if Sabine brings it up?”
I nodded. “I am loyal to the High King and the current form of government. We do have the beginnings of an Elitist problem on the West coast, but I was only made aware of it three days ago, hardly time to react. Renato is researching how they were dealt with last time and we are going to come up with a plan as soon as I get back to the compound. Given time, my actions will speak louder than their rumors. The truth always comes out eventually.”
Cayphis shook his head. “But you cannot wait until then. I know how these men work. Logic and honesty are not their top priority.”
“I know, but by law they cannot touch me. I already have my hands full with the ceremonies and issues with the transfer of the high kingship. For now I am going to have to ignore the rumors.” I held up my hand to stop whatever Cayphis began to say. “I have limitations and there is only so much I can confront at one time. I will deal with the rumors when I can, but not now.”
He frowned at me. “Just remember you are only human. A Mesitas has removed a Sept Son from power once before. I just don’t want this Mesitas to manage it with you.”
I nodded. The incident he spoke of happened four generations before. A corrupt Sept Son had control and the High King was growing old. The Sept Son made plans to overthrow the government and name himself as High King, but the Mesitas at the time thwarted his plot. The Sept Son was executed for treason.
“He won’t be able to do it, Cayphis. To remove me from my station he needs the High King and a majority vote. Ilar knows my true intentions with his daughter, Deucalion trusts me, and I trust Marcellus, Euginius, and you to also support me. That leaves Sabine and Quintinos. Don’t worry so much.” I smiled. “Between you, Tristan, and Horace, you would have me completely cowed and hiding under the nearest rock. I cannot go about my work in fear or I will be useless. All I can do is keep pressing on.”
“And what about your safety?”
“I am leaving that in God’s hands,” I informed him firmly. Though he did not share my beliefs, Cayphis always respected them.
“May your god deliver you from the goddess.”
“He will,” I assured him. “Now, I am hungry. Let us join the others.”
He agreed and we made our way toward the door. Even though I had spoken what I believed in my heart to him, I could not help the fingers of fear that crept into my chest. Please, Father, give me strength and wisdom.
Zezilia
THE ICY WIND HOWLED through the barren branches of the naked forest. The tree beneath the tree house groaned and creaked like an ancient thing in the gusts. I tucked my skirts closer around my ankles and buried my face deeper into the woolen material at my throat. I was frozen through, but a part of me kept crying out that I deserved to be cold.
I was flawed. I couldn’t manage to make it a single day without sinning in some way. The guilt that grew with each transgression weighted down my heart like the millstone in the back yard. I had tried. Ever morning I awoke and presented myself for breakfast resolved in my heart that I would make it through the day without a hurtful or deceitful thought or deed. Then I would falter. Accidentally break something, not answer with complete honesty, snap at Galatea or Eloine, or forget to do what I had promised I would, the list of my transgressions could go on forever. As the day progressed, the tally against me grew and the words of the Almighty’s Revelation would haunt me.
The Almighty was an all-powerful God, stronger than the goddess and more frightening. Unlike the goddess, He demanded perfection. A standard that I was daily reminded that I could not obtain. But the Almighty was also a God of love. I longed to please Him. I wanted for Him to love me, but yet another truth barred my way. He hated sin and I was full of it. It hung around my heart in chains, baring me from the one thing I craved. A shiver shook my being that had nothing to do with the cold.
A tear slid down my cheek, startlingly warm against the frigid surface of my skin. It was useless. I wanted to give up, but that wouldn’t solve my problem. I had tried that and my heart continued to ache.
“Zezilia.” Selwyn’s wild, smoky taste filled my mouth. “What are you doing up there?”
Quickly wiping away my tears, I reached out toward his presence to reply. “Thinking.”
“And crying. Child, whatever is the matter?” As he approached the tree, I could feel his concern rolling off of him like a wave. “Adreet sent me looking for you when you didn’t come home for lunch. Why are you crying?”
Between the concern in his sending and the feelings I was already receiving, my heart overflowed. A sob shook my shoulders and I buried my head in my hands. I was well beyond controlling the convulsions when suddenly I was enfolded in a brotherly embrace.
“Hush,” Selwyn murmured as he stroked my hair. The movement was so far from what I deserved; it only caused me to cry harder. “What is the matter?” he asked, withdrawing slightly to fish out a scrap of cloth for my face.
Accepting his gift, I mopped my face and blew my nose. Tears were still streaming down my cheek and chin, but I ignored them and offered the cloth back.
“Keep it and in exchange tell me what is wrong. Have you fought with Candra?”
I shook my head and covered my face with the gift.
“Fight with someone?”
“No,” I
