In the Woods of Memory

chewing gum. The stench of their sweaty bodies made Seiji want to throw up. Another house was entered. An old man pleaded for mercy on his hands and knees, but his entreaties were dismissed with contempt. A moment later, they heard another woman screaming. The village men stood motionless, their eyes darting back and forth between the house emitting screams and the ground at their feet. Some glared fiercely at the Americans, but as soon as the guns were pointed at them, they hung their heads. We should steal their guns and kill them all, Seiji thought. But he couldn’t move. Though tears flowed from his stony eyes and dripped from his twitching lips onto his sandy feet, he was powerless to move a single step. Inside the cave, Seiji bit his arm until it bled and scratched at the wounds inside his chest. After the Americans trampled the holy ground near the banyan tree, they sped away in their jeep. The revving of the engine and the screech of the tires echoed inside the cave. The smell of gasoline drifted in the air. After the men had left, Seiji stood there by himself for a while. Then he went home and grabbed his favorite harpoon. Squatting next to the well, he sharpened the head with a whetstone—until the slightest touch made his finger bleed.

Beyond the trees in Sayoko’s yard, the sound of sobbing never let up. Sayoko will never feel true happiness again. From now on, her heart will always be crying. Seiji was furious at himself for allowing the Americans and their guns to cow him into inaction. The war’s not over. It’ll never be over. Not for Sayoko. And not for me. No, it’ll never be over. Staring at the harpoon head shimmering in the moonlight, Seiji swore to keep fighting against the Americans. Over the next couple of days, he carried water and provisions to the cave when no one was watching. From early morning to early afternoon, he went fishing with his father. From early evening, he stood beneath the cliff with his harpoon and watched the Americans working on the opposite shore. I’ll wait here even if the warning bell rings. At sea, they won’t be able to use their weapons. At sea, I can beat them. Day after day, Seiji waited for the Americans to swim to their island again.

And yet, when the time came, he could seriously wound only one of them. Forgive me, Sayoko! I couldn’t avenge you.... But it’s not over yet. The grenade in his hand bore the full weight of all their grudges—those of Sayoko, himself, the villagers, and all the dead Japanese soldiers. This grenade will redeem me, he thought.

He wasn’t sure how many days he’d been awake, but he was so restless and excited that words bounced around in his head and made it impossible to sleep. As he waited with his eyes closed, he suddenly felt something warm on the back of his neck. Before he’d even realized it, the light filtering into the cave had changed to sunlight. He grimaced and squinted at the sparkling rays. Suddenly, a man’s voice echoed through the cave:

—Seiji, come out! We know you’re hiding in there. If you come out now, you’ll be spared. Don’t worry. Come on out. Your mom and dad, and everyone from the village, are waiting for you. Don’t do anything stupid. The American you stabbed isn’t going to die. So even if you’re arrested, you’ll be able to return home after a while. So come on out!

The person on the megaphone must’ve been Kayō, the ward chief. During the war, the guy had been the head of the Defense Corps and had spoken of the Americans with loathing. But in the camp, he did an about-face and got himself put in charge of distributing provisions. Before they knew it, Kayō had become the new ward chief. Seiji recalled his father always spitting out, Dirty rat! whenever he saw him. The rat’s trying to trick me in order to help the enemy. The bastard only thinks about himself—even though our women are living in desperation. I’ll stab him along with the others. Seiji stared at the entrance and waited for the Americans to enter. I’m not afraid of dying. But before I’m shot, I’m taking one or two of them with me. He kept a finger on the grenade pin, so that he’d be ready at any moment. Just wait, Sayoko! I will have my revenge! The ward chief’s voice cut off, and a silence like that of the bottom of the ocean filled the cave. Seiji hid and waited with bated breath.

Just then, he heard something fall into the cave. White plumes of smoke rose up toward the light streaming through the opening. Poison gas! Seiji clicked his tongue and immediately poured water from his canteen over a towel, which he then pressed to his nose and mouth. Then he pushed his face into a crack in the wall and tried to suck in fresh air from outside. The gas filling the cave engulfed him and sank deep into his eyes, nose, and skin. Tears poured from his eyes, which began to hurt so much he couldn’t open them. Splashing them with water from his canteen made no difference. Mucus poured from his nose and made his towel sopping wet. God of the Land! he prayed. God of the Woods! God of the Sea! God of the Village! I beseech you to protect me! But Seiji knew that like a poisoned fish floating with its white belly to the surface, his damaged lungs would soon fail, making it impossible to move. He finished off the water in the canteen and sucked in the last remaining scents of the woods and the sea. Then he wiped his eyes with the towel, turned toward the entrance, and lifted his swollen face to the light. Sayoko! Mom! Please protect me! With the grenade in his right