—Did something happen in class?
—No, nothing at all.
—That’s the truth?
—Uh, yes....
—You’ve nothing to worry about. I’ll keep any secrets, and protect you no matter what.
—Really, nothing happened.
—If you’re telling the truth, that’s fine. But I hope you’ll let me know if anything’s wrong.
—Okay. Thank you.
—Okay. So why don’t you lie down and rest for a while?
The nurse sounded nice, but I couldn’t trust her. If I told her what had happened, she’d certainly tell my teacher. And then my teacher would talk to the class, and I’d end up being accused of squealing. After that, I’d be bullied even more mercilessly.
I pulled the divider curtain closed, climbed into the bed, and pulled the thin blanket up to my chin. The air conditioner kept the room cool, but the thought of returning to class caused me to break out in an unpleasant sweat. The volleyball team girls who’d cleaned up my vomit were certain to harass me later. The smell undoubtedly lingered for the rest of the day. I knew that everyone’s annoyance would be taken out on me later, and that made me feel more nervous. Why couldn’t I control myself? If I had to throw up, I should’ve gone out to the sink in the hallway. As I started to blame myself, I recalled the gooey sensation in my mouth and pictured Mina and the other girls letting their saliva drip into the can. As my stomach started to churn, I fought back the nausea welling up into my throat again. Realizing I should try to think of something else, I remembered the lady who had given the speech in the auditorium.
Toward the end of her speech, the lady looked upset that students weren’t listening anymore. She fell silent and seemed to be struggling to find the right words. After what seemed like an eternity, she began:
—It happened when we were searching for shellfish. The ocean was dazzlingly bright under the afternoon sun....
Saying this, she squinted as if she actually were staring into the sun. Then she continued:
—There were five of us: me, three of my classmates, and a slightly older girl. We were searching for shellfish when four American soldiers came swimming across from the port on the opposite bank.
The lady’s expression grew stiff, and her eyes began to wander. I looked down to avoid her gaze, but then I remembered what Mina had told me, and lifted my head. That was when our eyes met. Once they did, I couldn’t turn away from her forceful gaze.
—The American soldiers... and this might shock you, but I’m telling you because I want you to know what happens during war.... Well, those soldiers raped that older girl.... And they destroyed her body and soul.... What made her even worse, though, was that her father beat her pretty badly. You see, he thought those Americans made her pregnant, and even though the girl was the victim, he told her that she was better off dead than giving birth to an American. After that, she did in fact try to kill herself... many times.... But she never succeeded.... In the end, she gave birth to a boy, but she could only be with her baby for about a month, because her father put him up for adoption.... Uh, that means someone else takes the baby and raises it as their own.... So anyway, her baby was taken away. And after that, she was even crazier, partly because she could never see her child again.... Her family couldn’t bear having the other villagers always talking about them, so eventually they had to leave the island. After that, the girl lived quietly in her home in the south. There are fewer US bases there, compared to the north and central parts of Okinawa, so she was less likely to see American soldiers... . But before Okinawa reverted to Japan, there were a lot more Americans than now, so she couldn’t risk leaving the house.... For more than ten years, she never went outside. . . . Even with her father still yelling at her every day, she gradually improved and became more mentally stable.... At that time, the family next door ran a dressmaking shop. They were really nice people, and they showed the girl how to operate a sewing machine. She was very skillful with her hands and could concentrate on her work for hours, so she improved very quickly.. .. When she started earning an income through her sewing, her father stopped yelling at her as much. She spent her thirties and forties like that, working all day at the shop next door and then walking home. She never even thought of going anywhere else. Even so, I’m sure those were the happiest days of her life....
The lady paused and looked off into the distance. Then she cleared her throat and continued:
—But then things started to change. About ten years after Okinawa returned to Japan, big stores started springing up, and the amount of dressmaking work drastically decreased. The shop next door managed to scrape by for a while, by doing alterations on school uniforms for the local junior and senior high school students. But when the owners got older, they said the work was too demanding and closed the shop. .. . The girl became confined to the house again. By then, her father was dead, and her brothers had moved out, so she lived alone with her aging mother. They lived simply, relying on her mother’s pension and some assistance from her brothers.... But one day, she suddenly went crazy again. She’d scream and yell, hide in the bathroom or closet and not come out for hours, or suddenly dash out of the house and run around. Up until then, she’d never gone anywhere except to the shop next door. Now she’d sneak out late at night and then be discovered sitting covered in mud in a
