“And yet you didn’t.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I was young. I fell in love.”
He turned to face her, his eyes glittering in the dim light. “Do you regret it?”
“I regret nothing,” she whispered.
A new awareness passed between them. They’d been attuned to each other from the first touch. Maybe the first glance. That feeling had developed into a strong connection and a deeper understanding. He’d loved and lost under completely different circumstances. He’d suffered at the hands of the Da’esh. They were bound by more than desire. It felt like fate.
His mouth descended on hers and the world fell away. She forgot that they were in a cramped space, on a dangerous journey, in a hostile country. She forgot that they weren’t alone. She forgot everything except him. His touch, his taste, his tension. She threaded her fingers through his hair and twined her tongue around his. He kissed her as if her lips held the secrets of the universe. He kissed her like she was his last meal.
Then he stopped and lifted his head. They couldn’t share more than kisses here. Even that was risky, because they were both too bold, too hungry, too adventurous. They were both living at full-throttle, reluctant to pump the brakes.
She wanted to express all her feelings, to bare her soul in a messy spill of emotions. But she held herself back, just as he did. There was no hope for them. They couldn’t be together. They probably couldn’t even stay in contact. It didn’t matter how strong the attraction between them was, or how true the bond. It didn’t matter how well suited they were. The obstacles between them were insurmountable.
He shifted to one side, and she snuggled against his chest. They couldn’t share a bed, but they could share this. A few stolen moments together and a private conversation. “Will you forget me after you return to America?”
“I’ll try.”
“How long will it take?”
“Not long. Ten or twenty years.”
She smiled at his sad joke. “I would like for you to find a woman to make love to. In a month or a year, whenever you are lonely and need to touch someone. For only one night, pretend she is me.”
He inhaled a sharp breath. “Will you do the same, with a man?”
“Should I?”
He shook his head. “I can’t decide what’s worse, picturing you with a stranger for one night or picturing you married with children.”
“I’d prefer the second.”
“I know.”
She brushed her lips over his neck, sighing.
“I can’t pretend anyone else is you, Layah.”
“You can’t?”
He lifted her chin to meet her gaze. “No, I can’t. Because there’s no one like you. Even if I found someone who looks like you, she wouldn’t be the same. She wouldn’t talk like you or think like you. She wouldn’t make me feel the way you do.”
Her eyes filled with tears and her throat closed up.
“I wish I could fulfill your fantasy. You can tell me all the hot details, if you want.”
“I can’t,” she said, biting his earlobe. “You will get excited.”
“Too late. What are you wearing under this?”
She pushed his hands away from her skirt. The combination of teasing and tenderness made her chest tighten with emotion. If only they could always be like this, without the ugliness of the world threatening to tear them apart.
If only she could tell him what he meant to her.
Instead she hugged him close and engaged in her favorite fantasy. It involved just the two of them, twined together on a blanket under the stars, sharing a night of passion in a peaceful place.
Chapter 15
Hud roused with the other passengers as they traveled through a busy city.
This must be Tabriz. It smelled of smog and spice. The sounds of traffic were deafening. People weren’t afraid to lay into their car horns here. Layah shared a snack of flatbread and dates from her backpack. Soon they were on a quiet, winding road again.
Hud focused on the piece of gray-blue sky visible through the ripped tarp above his head. He felt trapped in more ways than one, assaulted by memories of days in captivity. Getting a glimpse of the outside world helped to keep the monsters at bay. Making out with Layah helped more.
He couldn’t stay mad at her. He understood why she’d brought him here, and why she’d kept secrets from him. He’d let his anger take over last night, and he’d gone to a dark place. But he didn’t want to stay there. He didn’t want to be that kind of man. They’d both made mistakes, and they’d suffered enough. He’d rather look forward, toward the light.
Whenever she got close to him, he lost himself in her. It was impossible to ignore his feelings or hold his desire in check. He was tired of beating himself up for giving in to their attraction. He was hungry for a woman’s touch, and her touch affected him like no other. It soothed and inflamed him.
The truck came to a stop about an hour later. Hud put his turban back on. He also slipped Ashur’s knife into his boot, just in case. They had no other weapons. Aram had left his rifle in Urmia.
Olan removed the tarp and they piled out.
“We walk from here,” Layah said.
It would be easier to cross the border in a vehicle, but Hud didn’t blame Olan for leaving them on the side of the road. He’d already taken a huge risk by transporting them. Hud nodded his thanks as Olan drove away.
Layah had a short conversation with the others in their native language. Aram gave Hud a disapproving look. Whatever Layah’s plan was, he didn’t like it. Ashur didn’t like it, either. When she tried to hug him, he said sharp words and avoided her embrace. There were tears in her eyes as they started walking.
“What was that about?” Hud asked.
She adjusted her pack. “Nothing.”
Hud felt a surge of irritation. Instead of demanding answers, he summoned patience. Sometimes she was too independent for her own good.
“I told them not to wait
