Yes. Yes. It was all beginning to make sense now. If I was consumed by darkness, Icould never beat the shadows. I could never find the light. I looked up and saw the peaksof mountains with snow-white tips. I could see the waterfalls streaming down andsparkling like diamonds. The water roared as it toiled over large rocks and weatheringsandstones. I gasped as I looked at the sky. It was one of the most beautiful sights I’veever seen. It was a serious of opaque colors, with contrasting hues and dark undertones.The colors exploded throughout the sky like an aerial succession of fireworks. It took mybreath away. Then there was just a white beam of light.
“Nelly, are you there? Can you hear me?” a voice yelled from far away.
I lifted my head off of the floor and stared at the orderlies. The room was spinning,round, and round, and round.
“You fell and hit your head pretty hard. We’re taking you to the intensive care unit,”Dr. Ontarian said.
I tried to open my mouth to speak, to say something, but the words came outjumbled.
“Don’t try and talk. Just hang in there,” one of the orderlies instructed.
“Nelly? Nelly? Nelly?” Are you still with us?” he asked. I just closed my eyes.
The back door swung open, and I nearly fell out of the car. Nico forced me up to myfeet. I looked past him and focused in on the sky. The sun was beaming. Its rays werestrong and stung my eyes. He shoved me forward. It took me a while to regain mycomposure. Everything around me looked so familiar but foreign, as if I was living mylife as someone else. My arms were pinned behind me. Nico had them bound likeshackles. I stumbled on the very first step. I looked up to see Blazen peering down at mefrom the top landing. She was leaning against the rail, with one hand on her hip and acigarette dangling from her lip. I struggled to walk and felt like Jesus carrying a cross. Icontinued up the stairs, believing that when I reached the top, Blazen was going to stab inme in the stomach, rip my heart out and send me tumbling back down. Nico placed me infront of her.
She leaned in close to me. I could smell her perfume. Her once perfectly shaped nosewas crooked; her lips were cracked and stained with dried blood. And she had a hugebruise on her left cheek. I didn’t lower my gaze. She looked offended. I winced as her fistslammed into my face. Nico laughed.
“Okay mija, that’s enough for now,” he said.
My back molars wobbled like a door on lose hinges. My mouth was warm withblood. I looked her in the eyes. I was different now. I wasn’t scared and she knew it. Shetook a couple of steps back and stomped out her cigarette with her right foot.
“There’s more where that came from,” she said pretending to be more confident thanshe was.
Nico pushed me forward and continued to lead me up the stairs and into Maria’shome. There were more people in the living room, hording in the darkness like roaches.Nico turned on the light and they all scattered about. I felt like a prisoner marchingtoward internment. The people in the house stared at me with long faces, taut jaws, andexpressions of detestation like Hitler’s army of SS Guards. Nico released me, and I fellforward. The people around me laughed like wild hyenas. I struggled to stand back up. Ineeded to be strong. Nico forced me down to the ground. He yanked my shirt off. My brastraps fell over my shoulders, nearly exposing my breasts. He grabbed the back of myhead and leaned me forward like a witch about to be beheaded.
“You think you’re bad don’t you?” he sneered. I didn’t answer. “You don’t knowwho you’re fucking with!” he spat as he released his grip and walked over to the otherside of the room.
“I’m fucking with a coward who’s more afraid of the shadows than anybody,” Iquipped.
“What?” Nico asked turning toward me.
“You tell people that you can help them, but all you do is exploit them. You instillthem with fear and guilt, you make them feel powerless, so they can be dependent onyou. You know that you’re full of shit and more fucked up than any of the people thatcome to you for help!” I screamed while struggling to get up to my feet. Nico just stoodthere and stared at me speechless.
“He’s cursed us,” I said while turning around in circles and yelling into the crowdlike a rebel instigating a revolt.
“He fucks with our heads. He controls us with fear and forces us to bury the shadowsdeep inside of us, instead of facing them,” I continued. Nico walked over and tried tograb me by the throat. I pulled away and screamed out into the crowd.
“His brujeria is like fucking poison. It pollutes our thoughts. It spreads like aninfection, killing us off like a plague. And we pass it on from one generation to next,” Isaid.
Nico walked over and stuffed a piece of dirty cloth into my mouth and sealed it shutwith duck tape. My mouth filled with saliva, and I started to gag. The dirty garmentworked like a sponge, soaking up my vomit. I couldn’t swallow. The aftertaste caused meto grimace, and the residue sat in my mouth like oil in water. I felt like I had drunk awhole gallon of milk that had curdled in my stomach. My body was wet with sweat. I felldown. I was too weak to struggle so I lay on the floor, motionless, like a dead man in acoffin. Candles with flickering lights danced all around me. Nico was circling me like aninsurgent king, with his shadow moving around him menacingly. “You talk too goddamnmuch!” he yelled.
“You don’t know a fucking thing about what I do,” he said with spittle flying out hismouth.
“Look around you. Look
