The emperor was also dressed, jeans and a button-front shirt that looked way too neat and orderly for them to have just landed.
“Take a breath,” Theo told him. “And then come and sit with me.”
“Bullshit! I’m going to find her. She wasn’t where I left her and we torched the damn place. I need to find her now!” Steele’s chest heaved, pain ripping through every part of his soul.
Theo calmly reached out a hand to clap on Steele’s shoulder. “She’s fine. Shola remained in one of the trucks and Ziva didn’t shift. They saw when you brought her out of the rubble and got her out. Shola just sent me a message that they’re on their way to the hospital.”
He couldn’t breathe. “She was bleeding, man. I saw all that blood.”
“It wasn’t hers,” Theo said. “It was the guy’s and they’re going to make sure he gets whatever treatment he needs. You need to come with me now.”
Steele didn’t want to go with Theo. He wanted to get into whatever truck was parked out front and get to that hospital, to hold her one more time. But he followed the emperor into the living room and dropped down onto the couch as if the weight of the world now rested on his shoulders. He leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knees and dropped his head.
There was nothing but quiet now. No, that was wrong, his heart beat wildly, his beast searched for her, raging because it was here and not there. He closed his eyes tight.
“I know what you’re feeling,” Theo said.
“You can’t know.”
The emperor gave a dry chuckle.
“Trust me, man. I definitely know. Love’s a bitch and for a Drakon it’s a hot ball of fire-wrapped bitch.”
Steele looked up to see that Theo had sat in one of the chairs across from the couch in the large living area.
“Your case was different. Shola always knew who and what she was. She had a job and she set out to do it. The only thing that surprised her was that the man she was supposed to kill was a vampire,” Steele said dryly, recalling when Theo had fallen in love.
Shit! Was he in love?
Theo only shook his head. “Details don’t even matter, my man. Not the minute emotions get involved. You were in for this woman the moment you dreamed about her.”
Steele narrowed his gaze. “How did you know? Did Magnum tell you?”
“Nah. I am the emperor, remember. It’s my job to know what’s going on with my clan. And don’t forget my right-hand man’s a watcher.”
Bleu. Of course, he would know. That guy always seemed to know everything.
Steele fell back against the couch, lifting his hands to drag down his face. “I don’t know what’s going on. I feel so helpless. Just like I did before.”
“When your sister died.”
He dropped his hands to his sides. “Yeah, when Opal died. And before you say it, I know it wasn’t my fault. It was the order of things. My mother explained that once Opal’s beast had found its mate, her power would’ve multiplied. It would have been greater than any of us in the clan.” He sighed. “I didn’t want to believe it. I just knew it was a mistake and that I’d messed up. Even all these years later, I just knew. But dammit, man, she was my sister!”
“I feel you, and if it were me, I would’ve punished myself too. But falling into the Abyss for twenty years was enough, Steele. You’ve done your penance for something you couldn’t control. Now, it’s time to live your life. To move on in Opal’s memory. To trust your beast’s selection for your mate,” Theo told him pointedly.
That again. Steele hadn’t wanted to believe that part of being a Drakon was true. He’d certainly held a grudge against Theo for falling into that trap. But he couldn’t deny it any longer. He wanted Ravyn just as much as his beast always had.
“I thought I’d saved Ravyn,” he said. “By giving the Reaper another soul, I thought I’d saved her from his grasp, but there was so much more I didn’t understand then.”
“And now you’ve opened her eyes to who she really is. I’d say you did good here.”
“Then why do I still feel like crap.”
“Because you’re in love with her. And for all that love is supposed to be great and life-altering, in the beginning it mostly just sucks.”
“But it’s better now? You and Shola seem happy.” He could say that now, whereas before he hadn’t wanted to think about what Theo and Shola had together. He hadn’t cared because that type of connection wasn’t for him.
Now, everything was different.
“We’re happy. We’ve both accepted who we are and what our purpose is together in this world and we’re content with that. You and Ravyn, you’ve got to settle into your personal place, figure out what it is you’re meant to do here and now, before you can find that happiness together. It’s important to know that part of yourself first before you can give it to someone else. I fought grasping who I was for a very long time, like a couple hundred years,” Theo joked. “But when it came down to figuring out if I could live without Shola, I knew that I had to become one with myself first in order to make her happy. In your case, you’ve got a lot of shit to get together and now, so does Ravyn. My advice to you would be to let the dust settle. Shola’s gonna keep a close eye on Ravyn from here on out so you’ll know she’s safe. But take some time to figure out who and what you really are, Steele. What you can live with and what you can’t. If you can offer her happiness or if your past will forever haunt you.”
“In short, get your shit together, little bro, or you’re gonna lose
