Darshan strode up to the door. He couldn’t stand the idea of waiting whilst Hamish could be prone on the floor.
The guards slipped between him and the entrance before he could reach for the handle. “You cannae go in there,” said the black-bearded man Darshan had already pinned as the leader. The man glared at Darshan as if spotting something slimy crawling out of a swamp. “Standing order of the queen.”
Darshan straightened, firing back with his finest haughty look. They were actually serious? “I have no desire to break bones tonight.” If he’d been feeling less drained, he wouldn’t have bothered with such civility, but he would prefer not using what little of his magic he currently had at his command. “So I suggest you step aside now before I rethink that stance.”
The leader sneered at him. He’d barely opened his mouth, the creak of his first word passing his lips, when one of the other men crept up to whisper in his ear. The man’s eyes narrowed. He twisted to face his underling, seemingly seeking confirmation.
Well aware they still tracked his every move, Darshan tapped his foot. He made a show of cleaning his nails. It was an act that he usually did whilst the nails were already immaculate. Except this time, despite having scrubbed his hands clean with the remainder of their drinking water, dirt lingered in the crevices. Along with remnants of Hamish’s blood. “You have until the count of ten, gentlemen.”
The whispering stopped and the underling eyed him as if expecting a bolt of lightning up the arse at the next breath. The other guard also looked somewhat less sure about his orders. Even their leader had lost his cocky grin.
Darshan could practically read their thoughts. They believed he saw them as bothersome, annoying like fleas and just as easily dispatched.
He gave a little, slightly disappointed sigh. He truly had been hoping a fair warning would be enough. It seemed their fear of the queen’s wrath was greater than their qualms over personal injury.
“Wait!” the leader blurted, his hands held palms out before him. He backed away from the entrance, his lackeys following at almost twice the speed.
Unimpeded, Darshan marched into the room, throwing the door shut behind him.
Hamish stood near the bed, his head popping through the neck of his undershirt. “What the bloody hell—?” He stared at Darshan, panic widening his eyes. “Dar? What are you doing? You cannae be in here,” he hissed. “Me mum wouldnae allow—”
“I simply do not care what she wants right now. You almost died.” Maybe Hamish had. For a brief while. He didn’t wish to linger overlong on the idea, but it was a possibility. “So right now my only concern is for your mental wellbeing.” He crept closer, one hand pressed to the door lest the guards decided to enter. “How are you feeling?”
If Darshan were to judge by the mixture of confusion and distress on his lover’s face, no one had ever asked Hamish such a thing before.
“I’m just grand,” his lover muttered, tugging at his shirt. “And you dinnae have to tail me.”
“What is my alternative? What guarantee do I have that you will not find the means to make another attempt in the time I give you alone?”
“The means?” Hamish spread his arms. “With what? There’s nae a thing here that’ll cause a fatal injury and I cannae fit through the window.”
Darshan stared straight ahead, trying with all his might not to even glance at the massive antlers hanging above Hamish’s bed. If his lover hadn’t considered just how sharp those points were, then he certainly wasn’t going to give the man any options. “I am here for you, you know.”
Grunting, Hamish hung his head. “You should’ve left me to die.”
“Even if I did not want you, I would not have done that.” His heart all but leapt into his mouth as he registered the words pouring out his lips. Had he really just blurted out an admission to having certain affections for Hamish? Perhaps his lover wouldn’t notice.
Hamish paused in donning his overcoat. He settled on the side of his bed with a hefty thump. “What did you say?”
Was this really the place to unravel that particular snarl of emotions? Certainly not. They needed time. Hamish definitely didn’t need Darshan fumbling through whatever he actually felt and he needed to sort out just what those feelings were before he blabbered any further. “I would not have left you to die under any circumstance.”
Hamish shook his head. “Before that. You want me?”
Blast. So much for glossing over the gaffe by ignoring he had uttered a word on the matter. “I would have thought such a statement as old news. Of course I want you.”
“As an ambassador in your court.”
“As a lover.” They might’ve had precious little time alone, but he had enjoyed just being in the man’s presence. Did Hamish not think the same of him? It seemed unlikely, but so had what he’d attempted.
“More like a glorified bedwarmer,” Hamish muttered, the words barely audible. “That’s all I’m good for.”
You mean more to me than that. Unlike most of the men he’d been with, he had spent more time in Hamish’s presence clothed than not. And despite spending a fortnight sharing the man’s bed, they’d done no more than sleep for two and a half weeks. This was his longest romantic relationship.
And that blasted bear had come close to ending it. All because—
Darshan swallowed, his breath coming only as a frantic rasp. He opened his mouth.
His stomach chose that moment to offer up its own opinion, echoing loudly up his throat. He clapped a hand to his mouth. His face all but
