“No, it’s just that maybe if we’re not husband and wife yet, it’s not proper to tell people that we are.”
“Okay.”
“You know what I mean, right?”
“I know.”
“And I’m sure a lot of people know what fiancé means.”
“Maybe.” Karen nodded thoughtfully. “Teck How?”
“What?”
“We should get a maid.”
“What for?”
“I never had one.”
“If you want to.”
“A maid will mean there’s always someone at home.”
“Sure.”
They drove on in silence. Teck How kept to the right lane and overtook a few cars. Karen looked out of the window and whenever there was a dark patch on the glass she could see her own face. At one point of time a bird, black and small, flew across her forehead.
“Teck How,” Karen suddenly said.
“Yes,” Teck How answered.
“I’m happy. Do you understand that?”
“Yes, Karen, I know.”
“I don’t think you really know. I like this car, Teck How, I really like this car. I was a secretary before this. And last week you helped me write my resignation letter. Do you think they’ll miss me at the office?”
“I don’t know.”
“Because everything’s going to change, right? Because I deserve this. Do I deserve this, Teck How?”
Teck How kept quiet and checked all the meters in front of him. The oil tank was still full. He was going at one hundred an hour. On the radio, callers were supposed to call in to give their views on ‘What makes a man sexy?’.
“If I had half as much as you did, Teck How, I know what I’ll do,” Karen said.
“You do?” Teck How said.
“I’ll give half of it to charity. I don’t need much to live by. I could live with just one car. Would we really need a maid? I’m serious. All my life I’ve realised that I’ve liked money because I could give it away.”
“So you think that just because people have money they should be giving it away?”
“The ones who give to charity are always the rich ones.”
“So that’s how it works?”
“I think so.”
“And the minute you get your hands on money you’re going to start throwing 50 dollar notes at beggars? Hey, why don’t I give half of my life savings to that blind guy in that underpass, so he can put solid gold trimmings on his accordion?”
“I’m not saying that people who are poor can’t give to the poor. I’m saying it’s easier if you’re rich.”
“Karen, the problem with you is that you think everything’s so easy.”
“We can sell this car and get a smaller one.”
“And after that let’s just go ahead and adopt a baby! Now why didn’t I think of that before? Because I had an easy life? Because I don’t know what it’s like to live without things, unlike you? Because I had BBC?”
“Will you stop raising your voice, Teck How?”
“Turn down that fucking radio and I’ll stop raising it.”
“It was just an idea that came to my head! It was the news, Teck How. It was the BBC World News. Why are you shouting?”
When Karen turned off the radio she knew that they were not going to say another word for a long time, both of them. It was the radio that had kept them talking. They were in love as long as the radio kept on playing love songs. Teck How huffed now and then but he made no effort to adjust his tie. Karen tried to pull her mind away from the silence in the car and decided that on Saturday, she would go for a good shampoo at Takashimaya salon, a cut and blow-dry. She would read magazines while listening in on idle, happy chatter. She would breathe in the sharp smell of dye chemicals and conditioners while they fussed over her hair.
It was already evening when they reached Queenstown. They passed by a school where a long row of cars were parked alongside the main gates. They passed a bus interchange where there were schoolboys with their shirts tucked out and schoolgirls with their skirts hitched high up their waists, as if it were the latest fashion. They passed over the cracked shadows of rain trees and the long shadows of street lamps. They passed under a darkening sky. Karen looked outside her window and frowned.
“Weren’t you supposed to make a turning there?” she asked.
“Was I?” Teck How asked her back.
“Aren’t we going to my parents’ house first?” Karen asked.
“I don’t think so.”
“Where are we going?”
“Can you just shut up and let me drive?”
They kept on driving and since the radio was turned off they missed the evening news. As Karen was picking soundlessly at a balled up piece of tissue paper in her hands she missed the exact moment when the street lamps came to life. After a while she started sniffing and turned down the small louvres on the air-con vent. Then she wiped her fingers on her piece of tissue paper. She thought it had been unfair for Teck How to think that she wanted to marry him just so that she could share his money with other people. All she wanted to do was share this newfound happiness which she couldn’t understand and which she had lost in the time it took to drive from Raffles Place to Queenstown.
“Teck How,” she suddenly said.
Teck How was silent.
“I just want to know one thing.”
Without looking at her, Teck How asked, “What?”
Karen started to laugh. “I have no idea where Romania is. Where is it? What do they do in Romania?”
“I bet you don’t even know what the capital of Romania is.”
She had expected Teck How to laugh along with her. When Teck How did not answer she peered out of the window, her forehead on the glass. She squinted at the horizon. It was broken by cranes and flyovers and half-built buildings still veiled in green gauze. Karen scanned the sky for all things, an aeroplane, as if it were a sign she had been waiting for all her life.
PILLOWI saw his eyes flash for a moment, and the next minute I saw tears.
“Haven’t
