No matter which way I look at it, the connection and emotion between Briar and I are dangerous. It has the ability to distract both of us from the more significant cause. While I know she's brave, and she tries hard, I'm still not sure that if it comes down to it, she will let me die to save millions of souls. I need to be sure of that. I need her to be sure of that.
The best way to force her to disconnect, even if it's just in the slightest bit, is to pull myself away. But it's so damn hard. I roll my right shoulder, purposefully sending a jolt of pain through my back. It wakens me from my trance, and my hands release her. She stumbles a bit and opens her eyes, turning toward me with a questionable look. I put the dagger back on the table and cross my arms over my chest. "You need to be strong. I promise that I'll stand over you so that you can sleep."
She shakes her head. "You need as much strength as you can get."
I smile for just a moment and step forward, giving in to that pull one last time. My fingers gently push the hair from her face and rest on her cheek long enough to feel her warmth. "I can afford to lose sleep. I am immortal. No matter how powerful you are or you will become, you are still a human."
"A human with an immortal soul," she points out.
I nodded. "One that is pushing herself too hard. Come," I say, putting my hand out for hers. "Let me take you to bed."
She agrees with me and follows me from the room and down the hall to where I was sleeping. And while putting her to bed merely consists of making sure she gets comfortable while I stand at the window staring out at the vast expanse of the underworld, there's a pulsating want within my tightening groin to take her to bed in every way possible.
Hopefully, we'll have time for that as the days go on, but for now, I need her focus. All of life may depend on it.
Chapter 5
Briar
My sleep is dreamless, a sense of comfort and safety, no matter how false it is, blankets me.
I haven't slept this good since before Drogaem. I wake on my own, my body feeling stronger, and my mind clearer. Slowly I open my eyes, staring at the door to my room, thankful to have survived another night. I stretch my calves, feeling the soreness in them from my training last night. Carefully I roll over, turning my head toward Kane, who I know is most likely standing at the window as he does when he can't sleep. But when my eyes fall on the windowsill, all I see are pulled thick drapes. I quickly stand up, that familiar feeling of fear fluttering back into my chest.
I'm getting tired of feeling that fear.
I look all around the room, but Kane is not there. My jaw clenches, and that fear is taken over by anger. Kane has left me. He is most likely somewhere in the castle, working on a plan to help us, but he promised. The one thing I've learned since being in the underworld is that even my betrothed refuses to always be honest with me. He only told me he would watch over me so that I would go to bed. He knows that if he doesn't, I will train until my body gives out. And while I understand the reasoning as to why he lied, it's still frustrating, and I feel betrayed by him. We can only count on each other during this time, and that means that we need complete and total honesty between the two of us.
In a huff, I throw the blanket back and turn, setting my bare feet on the clammy stone floor. I stare out at the underworld, and it seems almost darker than it used to be. Everything seems darker. As I lift my body from the comfort of our bed, a roar echoes through the castle. My body freezes, and my eyes shift back toward the door. I know that voice all too well. It is mighty, but it is breaking.
It is Kane, screaming in pain.
Instantly I feel guilty for thinking that Kane had abandoned me. Instead, it's more than evident that he's chained, undergoing the torture that Drogaem puts him through over and over again. On the one hand, it shows that Drogaem is not tired of torturing Kane, which means we may live through the day. On the other hand, it means that Kane is being ripped apart yet again. That pain in my chest rolls deeply through me, hating every second of thought surrounding the torture of the man I have no choice but to love. It's not forced on me, and I know that now. No matter what connection he has bound us to, my love for him comes from another place.
Quickly I grab a dress from the closet, one that I put in the room the night before in case I fell asleep with Kane. I don't really care if Drogaem likes what I am wearing or not, but I need to choose my battles, and fighting with him over a dress isn't something that I want to add to the turmoil. This dress is different than the others, one that was carefully sewn by one of my handmaids before she left. It was a special request, and it makes me feel braver when I put it on. The black fabric clings tightly to my skin, dipping down in a low V in the front and laces up the back. The shoulders are merely fabric, but the torso is a corset, one that leaves room for me to breathe. The skirt flows down
