He splintered, longing to go after Scarlett. Not ready to face the shame wedging into him, cleaving a line through him, splitting Val off the block of hatred he’d nursed all these years.
He told her what he knew, which was only a whisper of gossip about Val and one of their female teachers. He still couldn’t fathom it, but it had to be true.
“Did you tell Niko?” she asked, eyes wide with horror.
“He asked me what I knew and I told him the truth, that I hadn’t seen anything, only heard other boys tease him because she flirted with him.”
Val had been thirteen. Tall and mature looking and, yes, selling a glossy image of sex for stupid amounts of money. That didn’t mean an adult woman having sex with him was okay. That didn’t mean it had been his choice.
“What did Niko do? Anything?” Kiara asked desperately.
Javiero drew a deep, pained breath, appalled as he recalled with a harsh, humorless laugh, “He said, ‘I guess your brother is a man now. When will you become one?’”
Javiero had pushed that out of his head the way he’d pushed away all his father’s disparaging comparisons.
What Val had suffered had been abuse, though. He could see that now and was filled with self-loathing at not having done more. No wonder Val had walked away without a backward glance.
“I have to go after him,” Kiara said, tears in her eyes. “But Javiero, we have to talk about Scarlett. She needs to see her doctor.”
CHAPTER TEN
SCARLETT WAS SHAKING as she paced the upstairs sitting room. She knew there was no avoiding Javiero, but he didn’t follow her right away, which only set her nerves more on edge.
When he did appear, Kiara was with him. They both looked shell-shocked.
“I have to go after Val,” Kiara said in a plea for understanding. “I’ve requested the corporate helicopter and will leave as soon as it gets here. I’m so sorry to abandon you like this. Javiero will explain.”
As Kiara disappeared, Scarlett looked to Javiero, whose profile was stony and unreadable. He stepped onto the small terrace that overlooked the pool. Waves of emotion rolled off him., but they were strapped down beneath layers of acute tension.
He wasn’t railing at her or demanding she come back to Spain, and she realized with deep chagrin that that was what she had been hoping for. She wanted him to want her. Needed him to demand she remain a part of his life.
He was damningly silent.
Nausea cramped her stomach.
“What happened with Val?” she asked in a voice that creaked with the strain she was under.
“I let him down.” His voice was brutally unforgiving. “I can blame Niko and our mothers and the fact I was a child, but—” He raked his hand across his stubbled beard, making a noise of self-disgust. “Kiara tells me I let you down, too.”
He turned, and his one eye was so empty of light it was a depthless sea of futility.
That bleak look cut through what was left of her nervous energy, reaching the parts of herself she kept hidden and protected from everyone.
“You didn’t.” She sank into a chair, exhaustion falling over her the way it did lately. “I didn’t see it. Didn’t tell the doctor how bad my symptoms were. I thought it was hormones or grief or the stress of being fully in charge of Niko’s money. I used to get blue sometimes, during my cycle, if things were particularly difficult. It always passed. I was sure this would, too...” These stupid tears. She was so tired of feeling weak! “I don’t want to be this unhappy, Javiero.”
He blew out a breath as if she had punched him.
“It’s not your fault,” she murmured.
“No?” He studied her as though she was a puzzle he couldn’t work out, his mouth tight with frustration. “You ran away.”
“I couldn’t stay with your mother after blowing up at her like that.” She didn’t know how she would ever face her again.
“You could have stayed in Madrid.”
“I wanted to see Kiara. I knew you wouldn’t forgive me if I went to her in Italy.”
“You could have met her anywhere. Anywhere but here, Scarlett.” His voice was grim. “This was the one place you could come that you believed I wouldn’t follow.”
Anger reared above her emotional exhaustion. “In case you haven’t noticed, this is the closest thing to a home I have. That’s what every creature does when they’re feeling run to ground. They hide where they feel safe.”
“You feel safe here?” He gave a ragged laugh of astonishment.
Not with him here. Maybe she had hoped his revulsion with Niko would act as a moat and drawbridge. There was so much wrong with them and so much wrong in every other aspect. She didn’t know how to deal with everything.
“At least I feel like I’m allowed to be here,” she murmured. “And having Kiara here—I don’t feel right handing Locke to a nanny.” She shrugged at the way it made her heart hurt to do so. “But Kiara feels like family. She’s the one person I can actually rely on.”
“You don’t think you can rely on me?”
“There’s not much room for error, is there? Explain to me how crying for help would elevate me in your eyes.” Hers were welling again with tears.
Javiero’s cheeks hollowed.
Into their charged silence, little feet came running toward them.
Aurelia appeared with a plush koala toy she’d taken a shine to. It had been a shower gift to Scarlett months ago. It had big glossy eyes and a button in its ear that made it say, G’day, mate.
“Auntie Scarlett, is this Locke’s?” Aurelia asked from the archway into the sitting room. Her little head tilted with entreaty as she hugged it.
“It is.”
A rush of love filled her. Not all the emotions that overwhelmed her were dark. Some were so intense she could hardly breathe through them, and love for this little imp filled her up to bursting. She was going to miss her
