Rachel shook her head. “It wasn’t even really a lie. I did feel too tired to go to the barbecue. Is it so wrong to want to watch my favorite show instead of a movie I’ve seen a million times? I’d planned on watching it in bed, but I was a little hungry, so I popped some popcorn. I’m allowed to change my mind.”
“It still feels deceptive,” Ty said. “You don’t have to keep things from me out of fear of being judged. If you’re afraid I’m going to judge you, then we don’t have trust, which means we don’t have a relationship.”
Instead of answering him, Rachel turned to the TV. They were talking about Damon’s murder, which meant it would have more of Rachel’s attention than Ty. It shouldn’t matter so much, because he knew the show was important to her. But it stung to know that she was more involved in a television show than in understanding how hurtful her actions had been.
Maybe they weren’t ready for a relationship. Rachel still obviously had to work through whatever issues she had about trusting him, even with minor things like a silly television show that people made fun of, and he had to figure out how much of this he was willing to put up with. When Rachel had deceived them into coming to the ranch, he’d had a hard time trusting her because deception was usually a pattern for people. He’d hoped that with Rachel finding Christ and realizing the importance of the truth, she would be able to break this pattern in her life.
But as he thought about how her lie—and more important, her justification for her lie—so easily slipped off her tongue, he wondered if this didn’t point to something deeper inside her that God needed to heal before Rachel would be able to handle a real relationship.
A commercial came on, so Ty decided to give it one last shot. “I know you think you were justified in not telling me about the television show, but you know how important the truth is to me. You used our concern for you to cover up your true intentions. That’s not how a relationship works. I need to know you’re willing to work on this.”
Rachel stared up at him. “And I think you’re making too big a deal out of nothing. I feel like you’re trying to control me with these demands. It’s ridiculous that you’re so upset over a small omission.”
“You lied,” Ty said, trying not to raise his voice.
“Maybe I felt like I had no choice, with everyone hovering over me.” She squared her shoulders, staring at him like she was ready to fight.
But he didn’t want to fight with her, especially since it was clear she didn’t understand how important this was to him. He wasn’t going to be manipulated into believing twisted versions of the truth because he was blinded by his feelings. If she saw honesty as control, then they couldn’t see eye to eye on the most basic value he held dear.
“Fine,” Ty said. “I was just coming to get some things for Katie to stay over at Janie’s tonight so we can get an early start in the morning.”
Initially, he’d told Katie that she couldn’t come with him because he didn’t want her waking up her mom. But now...
“Do you want me to bring her up to say goodnight?”
Rachel looked away from the television and gave him a small smile. “That would be great, thanks. I was thinking I’d get to see her in the morning, but if she’s at Janie’s, I won’t be able to.”
Ty gave a quick nod, then went to get Katie. While Katie said goodnight to her mom, he packed Katie’s things. He’d helped with Katie enough that he knew where her clothes were kept.
Katie grabbed his hand just as he was zipping up her bag.
“Come on! Janie said we have to hurry!”
He smiled at the little girl tugging on his hand. “You go. I’ll be right down.”
As Katie raced out of the room, Ty glanced over at Rachel, whose attention was back on her show.
She’d taken her eyes off it long enough to be with Katie, and while he couldn’t fault her for focusing on her daughter, it hurt that he didn’t get the same level of interest.
His heart shattered at the thought that fixing whatever was broken between them was less important to her than some fictional guy’s murder.
At least he hadn’t bought the ring he’d been eyeing. One less piece of evidence to his heartbreak.
Chapter Eleven
Rachel felt fine. Completely fine. So maybe she was a little more tired than usual, but who wouldn’t be with all the stress? Ricky’s doctor had recommended that Rachel see her kidney doctor in Denver as a precaution, and Ty had insisted on driving her. She’d tried to think positive, that their time in the car would give them the chance to talk. But so far she hadn’t managed to find a way to broach the subject of the previous evening’s fight.
Ty had said next to nothing, other than to communicate the plan.
Which meant he was probably still angry with her. She hadn’t liked arguing with him last night, and she sure didn’t want to start another fight now. Rachel hated arguing, especially with people she cared about. Sometimes it was just easier to give people the answers they wanted. When she’d called Janie this morning to talk to Katie, she’d mentioned it to Janie. Janie told her that she needed to find a way to learn to trust people even if it meant not saying what she thought they wanted to hear. She’d even confessed about the show, and Janie had laughed. Even
