The dark-haired girl then sat up straight and held a sour expression, when she crossed her arms. “Well you didn’t stop any of it, either.” Scarlett spoke, “you could have blocked my oracle code and ignored my presence and avoided all contact with me but you didn’t. You cheated on Orika with me. So that’s still not fair. You never chose me, Silas. You only choose me when our emotions are intense but you’d rather Orika be your girlfriend instead of me because you’re afraid of me.” She admitted, and unfolded her arms. Scarlett then rolled her eyes, and leaned back in the seat. “You’re afraid of what you can’t control. And that is exactly what Charlie did, but in reverse. I’m running, because I don’t want to get hurt. And I could never be with someone who fears me, the way that you do.” She seethed. “So let it go, Silas.”
Silas scoffed in offense.“No. I refuse to.” He sneered.“How could I fear the very thing that craves my safety and stability when it is hurt?”
She bit her lip, and shook her head. “That’s not true.” Scarlett said defensively.
“Yes it is.” He said, “you’re running again because you’re afraid to feel. My feelings for her are light. But the ones that I have for you, run deep. You’re a puzzle, and right when I think I have the last piece you always, somehow, find a way to create another one. And I want you to be with me, Scar. I always did. I’m not Charlie. I’ve always chosen you. It isn’t fear, it is more.”
Her eyelashes brushed over her cheek as she squeezed her eyes shut. She felt her eyes burn, as the tears began to form. Her feelings for Silas had been buried so deeply within her, but every time she’d been met with his presence, they seemed to forever resurrect. She did need him. She did crave his comfort. His love and reassurance. The way he made her feel okay. But feelings weren’t enough for Scarlett. Reassurance wouldn’t make her mother come back. Reassurance wouldn’t find out who had planted a bomb inside of her house. Reassurance wouldn’t make things okay. Those were things that only actions would have done. Actions terrified her, but brought things into fruition, which was why she envied it and despised reassurance. Reassurance was nothing. Silas’s reassurance was only an illusion.It was only something that took her away from reality. Like how her drugs did, in the past. Silas was her drug. He gave her a high, and she only needed him when her life got stressful, but never all the time. Was it love, she felt for him? Or safety, and familiarity?
She wanted to say so many things, in so many words, but couldn’t express them to him. It would hurt him too much. She was never angry at the fact that Silas was dating Orika and not her, but rather the fact that she knew she could never give her heart to the very thing that was her drug. Her beautiful escape. And like all the pleasures of life, too much of any pleasure would eventually make you sick. And that’s what he was to her. A beautiful escape. But she didn’t need to escape anything anymore. She had to be in the present.
“I’m being drafted. My parents are gone. My house is gone. I have to fight. I don’t have time for you, and I don’t have time for love.” She said harshly, and then she suppressed her emotions. Like how she always did, when they got too intense. When her emotions had crawled out of her skin like bugs and danced around her body and controlled her like strings, as if she were a puppet. She bit her lip. There was silence on the other line. “And what I need from you right now is the security of knowing that Liveria will be safe. Safe from violence. Safe from this world. I would…” Scarlett trailed off, and wiped away tears. “I would die for her.” She paused. “Just like you’d die for me.”
“Okay.” Was what Silas had said, after what seemed like the silence of a thousand years. Somehow, Silas could understand the love that Scarlett had for her sister. They had a bond. Just like how he had with his two brothers. Part of Silas wanted to scream. She could imagine him in that moment. What he would do. What he would say. How his words would have most likely wavered over the harsh reality that was her life, and took her away to someplace else. And how she would’ve looked at him and would somehow get lost within him. How he held her, and brushed over her body. How his tattooed fingers would touch her in only a way that Silas knew. As if, his love was a dance and Scarlett was the only one who knew the steps. But a dance is only a dance. A dance is learned, and taught. The only one truly loving a dance would be its creator. And Scarlett had never been the creator of their dance. Only Silas. “Nothing will ever happen to Liveria. I promise.” He said. His voice sounded as if it were in pain. As if someone had broken his nails and tortured him by making him stare at his bloodied finger, as it was left unattended.
“Thank you.”
“I love you, Scarlett.”
“I care for you too.” Scarlett spoke, and bit her lip. “Goodbye, Silas.” She said, and clicked off the line.
Her step-parents were dead. Even if Scarlett wanted to, she couldn’t have contacted any relatives. She had none.Well, there was her grandmother who of course, lived in Impala. She knew of nobody else but family friends, and Silas’s family. Friends of her parents had contacted her about Scarlett and Liveria’s
