“My marriage was the exact opposite,” he said. “It was toxic from the very beginning. The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve come to realize that Jacqueline probably only married me to get back at Garland. When she realized that it didn’t matter to him, that’s when she was done with me. It just took me a while to catch on.”
Indina reached over and ran her fingers along his forearm, compelled by the need to provide him just a small bit of comfort. He seemed to glom on to it, covering her hand with his.
“How did you find out about her infidelity?” she asked.
“I hired someone to follow her.” His derisive snort told Indina everything she needed to know about how that turned out. “It was a waste of money,” Griffin said. “It’s not as if she tried all that hard to hide it. They went to the same hotel every week. Even charged it to our joint credit card a couple of times.”
“Talk about ballsy,” Indina said. “It’s as if she wanted you to find out.”
“She did. That’s why she chose a hotel that was just a few blocks from my old job back in Milwaukee.”
“Is that why you’ve always insisted we go to your house instead of a hotel?” Indina asked.
He lightly squeezed her hand. “That has nothing to do with it. I want you in my bed. You belong in my bed. Only my bed.”
Why did that hint of possessiveness turn her on so damn much? Normally she would balk at the insinuation that she belonged to any man, but not today. Today, her nipples drew tight and achy just at the thought of Griffin only wanting her for himself.
“So, what happened when you finally confronted your ex with the evidence?” she asked.
“I didn’t. At least not right away.” He blew out a weary breath and ran a hand down his face. “I should have. Maybe it would have prevented me from doing what I eventually did do.” Before Indina could voice the question, Griffin continued. “The weekend after the investigator emailed me the pictures, I went out with some friends to get my mind off of the fact that my marriage was essentially over. I drank way more than I should have, but not enough to be incapacitated or not know what I was doing…”
She was almost afraid to ask. “What did you do?”
He paused for a moment. “Made eye contact with this random woman at the club, followed her into the bathroom and had sex with her.” He shook his head. “I don’t even know her name. Never bothered to ask.” He sucked in a deep breath. “It was the absolute lowest point in my life.” The pain in his voice touched her deep down in her bones.
“Griffin,” she whispered.
“I knew I was doing it to get back at Jacqueline,” he continued. “I’d convinced myself that she deserved it. But stooping to her level was never the answer. I can’t tell you how much I hate that I allowed myself to become the kind of man who would do something like that.”
Of all the things he could have admitted to doing, that was never even on the list. Granted, this was the first time they’d ever discussed something so deeply personal, but she and Griffin had hung out together with their coworkers enough times for her to know that he prided himself on being honest and upstanding. It was one of the things Indina most admired about him. Committing adultery, even though it was to get back at an adulterous spouse, didn’t jibe with what she knew about the man sitting next to her.
“I guess it’s understandable that you would—”
“No, it isn’t,” Griffin said. “I refuse to make excuses for what I did. It was wrong. I own up to that.”
“Tell me the divorce came quickly after that,” Indina said.
“It did. Once I showed her the pictures, she knew she couldn’t deny it.”
“Did you ever tell her what you did?”
He shook his head. “No. I did it to hurt her, but I soon recognized that she didn’t love me enough to be hurt by it.” He looked over at her. “I never told anyone what I did. Not even the friends I went out with that night. This is the first time I’ve talked about it in six years.”
Indina had trouble swallowing past the knot in her throat. Knowing that he trusted her with something so personal, so painful, humbled her like nothing had before.
“I’m so sorry, Griffin.” She wrapped her hands around his muscular bicep and rested her head on his shoulder.
“Does this—” He cleared his throat. “Does this change the way you see me?”
Indina looked up at him. If the look in his eyes didn’t tell her how much her answer meant to him, the anxiety bracketing his mouth would have.
She shook her head. “No,” she answered softly. “Actually, that isn’t true. I’m touched that you trusted me with something so personal.”
Indina questioned her next move before she made it. It was the one thing she’d avoided in the last eight months. But as she stared into Griffin’s eyes nothing felt more right. She captured his jaw in her palm and touched her lips to his. Griffin’s groan was audible. Indina felt his body shudder as he gently glided his lips over hers.
She understood the significance of this moment, what it meant to finally open herself up enough to kiss him on the lips. Instead of scaring her, it made her even bolder. She opened her mouth and pulled his tongue inside. And wondered why it had taken her so long to taste his kiss.
She reveled in the pleasure that seized her body, the unmitigated bliss that captured her senses as Griffin’s tongue tangled with hers. It had been so long since she’d allowed herself to be so thoroughly kissed. She’d missed it. This feeling of closeness, of intimacy, of trust.
It didn’t come as a surprise that Griffin’s kiss surpassed any
