“Oh, man,” I said. “I’m sorry, I had no idea.”
“Few do,” Abi said. “I apologize for being so abrupt with you. But even joking about using the portals without explicit permission is grounds for dismissal from my post. They could jail me for sedition.”
“That’s insane,” I whispered. “Have things gotten that bad?”
“I hear bits and pieces only,” Abi said with a shrug. “But the protests are becoming more brazen. And there have been attacks.”
Suddenly, the work I was doing for the Shadow Phoenixes seemed even more important. Abi and I were finally on the same team, even if he didn’t know it.
“That’s terrible.” I shook my head. “I’m going to leave you to it. Need to think about some things.”
“You should meditate on your problems. It will help to clear your mind,” Abi said. “Especially of girl problems.”
Abi didn’t know the dangers that came for me when I meditated, but he was right about one thing. I needed to clear my mind and really look at the problems I had. It was the only way to conquer them.
“You know what,” I said, “that’s a good idea.”
We shook hands and gave each other half a hug, and I headed off to see if I could get my mind right. The cottage would’ve given me the most privacy, but it was too tangled up in everything for me to relax there. How could I concentrate on a peaceful mind in the same place where I’d been whisked away by a transport or stepped through a portal into a different city?
The library cells offered some privacy, but they weren’t exactly comfortable. I needed some place natural, where I could feel a breeze on my face and smell the wind.
That was it. I knew exactly where to go.
I found the strange path that led to the shifting terrain off the upperclassman floor. It was the perfect place for meditation. I felt better and calmer as soon as I headed toward the first hill. The path took me in a slightly different direction this time, though it still ended up crawling up the face of the mountain. When the wind grew chilly, on the verge of becoming unpleasant, I backtracked a little and took a seat.
“Hey!” someone shouted in surprise.
I jumped back and fell into a defensive posture, hands raised in a cross guard to ward off a blow to my head.
“Oh, by the Flame,” Rachel said. “I’m so sorry, I keep sneaking up on you like that.”
“How long were you behind me?” I asked, suddenly concerned. If Rachel, who was really quite terrible when it came to the sacred arts, was able to sneak up on me so easily, I’d be easy prey for a more experienced practitioner.
“Not as long as you think.” She chuckled. “I came out here to get some fresh air and saw you coming up the mountain toward me. I hid back here to surprise you.”
She pointed to a small crevice hidden by shadow. I’d never have fit back there, but Rachel was so small she’d had no trouble squeezing into the tight confines of her hiding place.
“What a coincidence,” I said. “I was coming out here to meditate.”
“It’s a good place for it,” Rachel said. “You mind if I stay with you?”
I didn’t mind, and that was the problem. If Clem and Rachel were both competing for me, I didn’t know what to do. I liked them both, though not in the same exact way. Clem had done so much for me, and there was a deep bond that had been forged between us during the time when everyone else had turned their backs on me.
My relationship with Rachel, on the other hand, was new and mysterious. It was exciting in a way that intrigued me, but I wasn’t sure if it would last. Then again, if I ran away from her, I’d never know what might have been. I knew that taking Rachel with me to meditate carried a risk. I could lose control of my darker self, and the Eclipse nature could rear its ugly head. But there was also a risk in avoiding this moment with Rachel. If I kept turning her away, she might not keep trying to spend time with me.
I decided the possible reward outweighed the risk.
“Sure,” I decided.
“Awesome.” Rachel took my hand and gave it a squeeze. “Come this way.”
She led me a bit further up the mountain onto an almost-hidden path that curved back deeper into the stone flank. We passed under a natural granite arch, and I was momentarily blinded by the transition from daylight to the much dimmer illumination provided by dozens of scattered electric blue specks.
“Have you ever seen anything like it?” Rachel had stood up on her tiptoes to whisper in my ear, and her breath sent a shiver down my spine.
My eyes adjusted to the strange light in stages. First, I could only see the specks of light in the gloom. Then the walls that supported the lights emerged from the shadows, curving around us in a cool embrace. Finally, the flowers that were the source of the glow took on more details. Their broad fronds were open wide to reveal the pistils and stamens that seemed to glowed brighter by the second.
“No,” I whispered back. “I haven’t.”
Rachel guided me to the center of the chamber, then motioned for me to sit on the floor next to her. Wordlessly, we assumed the classic meditation pose: legs crossed, spines straight, the backs of our hands resting on our knees with our palms facing the ceiling.
I’d expected the stone floor to be uncomfortable and cold. Instead, it supported us comfortably and reflected our body heat to keep us from getting
