Maggie glanced out the window and then back to me. “Well, now’s your chance to talk to him. You’re not going to figure out what to do if you don’t talk things out with him.”
She gathered up all the babies, tucking them back into the stroller, and headed for the door. She flung the door open and smiled big at Alec.
“Well, imagine seeing you here.”
“Maggie,” he smiled. “Why am I not surprised that you’re here?”
“Well, someone had to make sure that she was here when you got released. Sebastian! Come help me with the kids.”
Cap shot me a grin as he walked in and helped Maggie gather up all the stuff she had brought over for her very short visit. Obviously, the two of them had planned this out to make sure that I didn’t run off without seeing Alec. I watched from a distance as Alec walked over to the couch, slowly lowering himself onto the cushions. When everyone was gone and the silence was all that was left between us, I decided that Maggie was right. I needed to talk to Alec about this. But we couldn’t just rehash all the shit that we’d already said. That wouldn’t help at this point.
“So, Cap texted me to let me know that you told him about Reid and Caitlin.”
He shrugged and rested his head back against the back of the couch. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
I cleared my throat and decided to take the first step. “So, I think we need to talk about where we go from here.”
He opened his eyes and glanced at me warily. “And where is that?”
“I don’t know. I’m still really angry and I can’t just forget what you did, but I can’t live in the same house as you and just pretend that you don’t exist.”
“Do you want me to leave?”
“Maybe,” I said quietly. “I don’t know.”
“Let me ask you this, would it make you feel better if I left?”
The thought of him leaving hurt just as much as him staying. “Maybe you could stay, but…but stay in a different room.”
He nodded and leaned forward slightly. “I’ll agree to stay, but I have one request.”
“What’s that?”
“No more cold cocking me with your gun.”
I huffed out a laugh, not expecting him to say that. For just a moment, things were normal between us. For just a moment, I could see our future and what we could still have. But then the darkness crept back in and the moment passed. Alec’s smile slipped from his face and everything shifted back to the anger and hatred. I could tell he was grasping to get me back when he slipped his hand into mine, but I couldn’t deal with it yet. I couldn’t have him acting like we could make this right with just a laugh.
I stood and grabbed my bag off the floor. “Well, I have to go get a workout in. I’ll be back later.”
I walked out the door without looking back. I wasn’t sure that I could do this with him, but I had just taken the first step in the direction of healing. That was as much as I could give right now.
✯✯✯✯✯
“Hey!” Craig shouted as he walked through the front door. “You ready?”
I came running down the stairs, bag slung over my shoulder. I was running late. I had gotten caught in the hallway in a staring contest with Alec. Well, it wasn’t so much a staring contest as a very awkward attempt at conversation. It had been two weeks of me avoiding him whenever I was home. He knew what I was doing, but he didn’t push me. He talked to me when I was in the room, and even if I didn’t answer, he would continue to try and reach me. It was uncomfortable at the best of times.
“I’m coming, I’m coming.”
“Yeah, you said that twenty minutes ago.”
“Sorry, I was…dealing with something.”
“She’s talking about me,” Alec said as he walked down the stairs. He looked a lot better than he did when he was in the hospital two weeks ago. He had been doing what Cap ordered and stayed home. He hated every minute of it, especially when everyone else was so busy. I knew that Derek stopped by frequently to keep him company, but Hunter was still avoiding him like the plague.
“Hey,” Craig said, giving a nod to Alec. “You look better.”
“Yeah, well, sitting on my ass all day will do that.”
They stood there for a moment, just staring at each other. God, this was so awkward. “Anyway, we should get going.”
“Where are you guys headed?” Alec asked.
“On a job,” I answered sarcastically.
“Yeah, I figured that.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and tried again. “It’d just be nice to know where you’re headed. You know how paranoid I am.”
“It’s funny how you only seem to care when it suits you,” I snapped. “First you left our team and then you sent Reid away. But now you care about what’s going on with me? Do me a favor and stay out of my fucking business.”
His face dropped slightly, but he recovered, not letting on how much I was hurting him. It was like I couldn’t help myself. Every time that he opened his mouth, I just wanted to wound him in any way I could. I didn’t know how else to protect myself from him.
He took a step back, running his hand over the back of his neck. “Be safe out there.” He turned and walked away, making me feel like an absolute bitch. I couldn’t think about that now. I followed Craig out the door and got in the SUV where Rocco was already waiting.
“That was harsh,” Craig huffed. “I mean, I knew that the two
