The smirking crowd watched me expectantly. After Tanya had publicly fired Martin at What’s My Line? I fully expected to suffer the same fate. Denis eyed me with a steely gaze, a far cry from the smile he’d offered just moments ago when we met and shared a few chuckles. Humor. The man has a sense of humor, I thought. Use it. “Hi, folks,” I started. “Well, that’s the last time I ever rely on spell-check to proof a page. This should be a good lesson for all of us.”
The crowd chuckled as they realized how this mistake must have been made.
“You know,” I said, “now I understand why the reporter from Penthouse showed up to cover the press conference. I couldn’t figure it out before. But in all seriousness, I’m really sorry, Mr. King.”
The room fell into laughter again with a smattering of applause. Denis leaned over and whispered in my ear, “I’m smiling and pretending to be joking with you, but I want you to know that I’m unhappy, very unhappy. This is inexcusable. You people humiliated me in front of…Forget it. After my exhibit is over, I will never give this two-bit museum another dime.”
“Oh, Mr. King, you’re so funny,” I said, slapping his back while laughing knowingly (knowing I was about to be fired). Denis grinned at me really friendly, and then at the reporters.
I turned the laptop back on, and finished giving the presentation that Sammie had abandoned. The only glitch was a typo on the last slide thanking Denis for his “pubic service,” instead of his “public service.” Luckily, I caught it immediately and switched off the computer. At that point, I received a standing ovation. Well, there were no chairs in the room, but they would have stood, that’s how much the audience liked me and appreciated my quick thinking and keen sense of humor. If only Denis felt the same way.
As soon as the applause died down, Denis leaped off the dais and said a few words to Tanya. As he and Annie dashed off, Tanya hastened after them and snatched the 1904 Gwendolen Maxwell tiara off the child’s head.
“Ouch,” she yelped. “You pulled my hair. Daddy, she pulled my ha-aaaair.”
“I’m sorry,” Tanya said, her hands clasped in front of her heart. “You forgot to give it back…Please forgive me. I never meant…”
Denis kissed his little girl’s head, took her hand, and led her out the door.
As soon as the last reporter left, Tanya (with Sammie in tow) cornered me. The Extra camera crew continued filming, while the sound guy stuck a microphone boom in my face. “I don’t know what to say to you,” Tanya said.
“How about ‘Thank you for taking the blame for Sammie’s mistake.’ I told her the presentation hadn’t been proofed.”
Sammie’s jaw dropped. “This was my first week on the job. How am I supposed to know his name was Denis and not Penis?”
“You’re kidding, right?” I said.
Tanya laid into me. “Your mistake made us look like fools, Holly.”
Is this it? I wondered. Am I to be finished off by an errant typo, now, on top of everything else?
“You humiliated Denis King,” Tanya continued. She was on auto-rant. “He made it clear we would see no more money from him after the tiara show ends. Do you know how long I’ve been courting him? Do you know how much your negligence is going to cost us? What were you thinking? No, never mind,” she said, not letting me get a word in. “You weren’t thinking at all.”
“That’s right, you weren’t thinking at all,” Sammie parroted as she stormed out of the room behind Tanya, with the Extra crew on her tail.
As I watched the Satan twins disappear, I crumpled to the floor and rested my head against the wall. In my mind, I went through a checklist of everything I’d lost. Promotion. Check. Wardrobe. Check. Kitty. Check. Apartment. Check. Alessandro. Check. Denis King’s respect. Check. My dignity. Check.
Admittedly, not all had been perfect. Who wants to be a curator for a megalomaniac like Tanya? Who needs a cat with three legs when you could have one with four? Who wants to marry a hypercritical child-molesting lying rat fink like Alessandro Vercelli? Knowing what I know now about him, I see that my life had been no more than a facsimile of a cheap imitation of a sham. But still, it was my sham, my promotion, my beloved cat, and now they were gone.
“As God is my witness, I will reclaim my life,” I declared aloud. Not my old life, a better one! It was all very Scarlett O’Hara without the dirt and turnips. But I meant it. I was sick of playing it safe. I chose Alessandro because he was safe, and look where it got me. From now on, I’m going for what I want, no more selling myself short or letting people walk all over me. For the first time in my life, I felt an inkling of my own power. I would have my happy ending. It was all up to me.
I’ve Got the World on a String
MY EAR WAS GLUED to the door, but I couldn’t hear what Nigel was saying on the phone. Old mansions are so solidly built. Damn them.
Nigel whipped the door open, causing me to jump back.
“So? What did they say?” I asked, biting the inside of my lip. This was step one of my master plan to take my life back. Nigel was pitching me to speak on the Tiffany Star’s upcoming trip to Rome. He knew the booking agent from just having lectured on the French Riviera cruise.
He smiled. “There was good news and bad news, luv. They would be happy to have you speak, but not on that trip. You see, they’ve already scheduled a fashion expert.”
“Shoot,” I said, leaning against the wall. “It has to be that cruise. When
