Clara swallowed and bit the inside of her lip until she tasted blood and then she spoke. ‘Why the hell did you think I needed to know that? Why did you think you needed to drive all the way here and stalk my new house and tell me that? What was your intention? To make me feel bad? To see my reaction so you and Judas can laugh about it later? Why?’
As Clara spoke, she felt tears fall but she knew they were tears of rage not sadness. Of sheer frustration and anger that he dared to enter her world. Her perfect little world in Merryknowe that she was creating.
‘You cheated on me, you hid your relationship with my best friend for God knows how long and now you think I need to know your lovely plans with chinless babies and tacky weddings? What is actually wrong with you? You’re a sad, pathetic man who is here to try and hurt me. Well, guess what? I don’t love you. I don’t think I ever did. I chose you because you seemed safe and non-threatening. I chose you because I didn’t want to have sex with you and you didn’t want to have sex with me either. I was sad and pathetic also, so don’t think I don’t know I settled with you for something less than I deserved. We are better off apart and you and Judas can have a lovely life together but please go now. I don’t care about you. I don’t think about you. It was as though my life before here never happened. Everything I want is here and I’m happy.’
Giles stepped back from Clara as though she had slapped him.
‘Do you mean that man I met earlier, the bearded meathead drinking beer on your lawn? Your tastes have gone down. You like them burly and stupid, I see.’
‘Why do you care what I want?’ she asked, genuinely confused. ‘You didn’t want me, so why do you care what I want now?’
Giles shrugged and gestured to the cottage. ‘Well, I am surprised you want this and him – it’s all a bit of a step backwards, isn’t it?’
Clara took a deep breath and then blew out the air slowly, trying to maintain her cool.
‘He is one thousand of you, Giles. Maybe a million. He can do anything and he does it for me. And I love him. I think of him every minute of every day in a way I never thought about you. I want to make him happy but with you, I existed to try and please you but failed over and over again. The smallest thing I do for him, he is happy. I want that. I deserve that. I used to exist off the scraps of your love that you breadcrumbed through our relationship to keep me on the trail but this man, this man and his child have my heart in a way you never could. So please leave now or I will have my bearded meathead of a man throw you off my land.’
Shaking, Clara went to her car and picked up her bag and papers and the shopping bags then walked into the cottage, where she saw Henry and Pansy standing in the hallway. She knew they had heard every word.
‘Something smells delicious. What’s for dinner?’ she asked cheerfully, putting down her things.
But she was still shaking. She felt Henry’s arms around her and Pansy’s arms around her legs.
‘I love you,’ she heard Henry say and Pansy mumbled into her bottom, ‘I love you, Clara.’
Clara waited until the sound of Giles’s car had disappeared before she burst into loud, noisy sobs, with Henry rubbing her back, and Pansy patting her bottom like she was a baby.
Finally, she finished crying and she pulled away and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her top and Pansy handed her some toilet paper to blow her nose on.
‘Thank you, sweet pea,’ she said to Pansy, who nodded, her face very serious.
‘I cry like that when I miss Mummy. It’s good to cry, Daddy says.’
Clara bit her lip to stop from crying again and looked up at Henry.
‘That was intense, sorry.’
‘Don’t say sorry for speaking the truth, my love.’ His eyes were so kind, she felt dizzy with love.
‘I have something to show you. I know it’s probably not an ideal time, as emotions are high, but you will hear it later and wonder what on earth is going on.’
Clara looked up at him.
‘I could do with something nice right now to take my mind off the murder I’ve been planning.’
She put her hand out to Pansy who took it, while Henry took her other one and he led them out the back door.
Clara’s eyes adjusted to the light and then she saw the chicken coop.
‘You didn’t?’ she yelled, jumping up and down.
‘I did,’ said Henry, looking worried. ‘Should I not have?’
She and Pansy ran towards the coop and Clara burst into laughter at the door.
‘What does it say?’ asked Pansy, excited like Clara.
‘It reads, Clara’s Clucking Castle.’ She turned to Henry who was standing with his hands in his pockets, looking both pleased and embarrassed.
‘You are hilarious,’ she said. Her eyes caught his and she smiled at him, seeing him flushed with pride at the reception to his gift.
She opened the door carefully and let Pansy in then she followed. They went to the nesting box and Clara lifted the lid. A single egg sat on the straw.
‘There’s an egg,’ squealed Pansy. She picked it up carefully and held it close. ‘I will love this egg forever and ever,’ she exclaimed.
‘Or you can have it for breakfast tomorrow,’ offered Clara.
‘Can I, Daddy?’ Pansy called and Henry nodded.
Pansy opened the door to the coop to run inside and Clara quickly closed it as Henry came to watch the chickens scratching about the ground.
‘You did this for me,’ she said. It wasn’t a
