Coming to his senses, he pushed her away. "What in blazes do you think you're doing?"
"Kissing you!" Her cheeks were pink; her chest heaved. "Have you fallen in love with me yet?"
"What?"
"Juliana said that after I'd kissed you, you'd fall in love with me. Have you?"
"Hell, no." She was a very lovely girl, even more lovely now that she was a little lively for once. Her blue-gray eyes were sparkling.
But he loved a girl with hazel eyes.
"Where is Juliana?" He glanced around, his own eyes widening. "Good God, this is the ladies' retiring room." The chamber was strewn with reticules and other feminine belongings. Screens in two corners most likely hid chamber pots—but he wasn't about to make his way over and find out. "It's a miracle no one else is in here. Someone could appear any minute."
"I know."
"Ladies tend to visit in bunches. Any number of guests could have seen us kissing!"
"I know."
"You know? You know?" He grabbed her by an arm and took a step back, and then another, and another, until they'd returned to the momentarily deserted but very public corridor. "Have you any idea what could have happened had we been caught?"
"What I was hoping would happen?"
"What you were hoping—" He broke off as the truth dawned on him. "You and Juliana planned to trick me again, didn't you?" The accusation came through clenched teeth. "I'm going to kill that meddling little chit."
Was it just yesterday he'd decided her meddling was actually helpful?
"She didn't meddle," Lady Amanda said, her eyes flooding. "It was my idea this time. All my idea. She refused to help me. She said it would be unethical."
"Damn right it is!" What was it with ladies crying in his presence? Yesterday Juliana, and now Lady Amanda. Was the female race unified in their efforts to cut him to pieces?
A tear overflowed and ran down her cheek, slicing him even more. "Why can't you just agree to kiss me, then? You want to, don't you? You've been courting me for weeks."
"I most certainly have…"
Not. He'd meant to say not. But the word wouldn't pass his lips. Good God, he abruptly realized, he had been courting her for weeks. Or at least it must have seemed that way to her. He'd sent gifts and asked her to dance and—
Suddenly he needed to sit down. But there were no chairs in the corridor, and he seemed to have lost the strength to propel himself to another location. He leaned against the wall instead. "Well, that is…"
How could he explain it? Although she and Juliana had certainly been wrong to trick him, what he'd done was just as bad in its own way. His actions had implied he was interested in Lady Amanda, so he could hardly be surprised she'd come to that conclusion. He'd had no right to mislead her in order to achieve his own ends with another woman.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I—"
"My father will be home tomorrow afternoon," she interrupted in clipped tones, clearly impatient with his half-assed efforts to explain himself. "For all I know, he may not let me out of the house again before my wedding. However will I escape marrying Lord Malmsey then?"
"Escape…what?" He blinked. "Your wedding? I don't understand. What on earth makes you think Lord Malmsey would marry you? He's in love with Lady Frances."
"Well, he offered for my hand before he met Lady Frances. And my father is going to make us marry, unless—"
"You're engaged?" he interrupted. "To Lord Malmsey?"
It was beyond his comprehension. All the time Juliana had been trying to match him with Lady Amanda, the woman had been engaged?
"We're to be wed a week from today. And the only way I can get out of it is if I'm caught with another man." She grabbed both his hands. Reserved Lady Amanda grabbed his hands, and she wasn't even wearing gloves. She was that desperate. "Could you please just cooperate?"
A better man would. A better man would make amends for his actions by following through. But he couldn't.
He just couldn't.
Two women entered the corridor, heading for the ladies' retiring room. He pulled his hands from Lady Amanda's and lowered his voice. "I cannot," he said. "I'm sorry, but I cannot cooperate. I cannot marry you. I'm in love with another woman."
He turned and stalked back to the cloakroom, unsure whether he was more furious with Lady Amanda for trying to trick him again, Juliana for trying to match him with an engaged woman, or himself for misleading them both. All he knew was he was in no state of mind to socialize. He wanted to go home.
"James!" he heard as he passed the ballroom.
He turned to see Juliana, a cautious smile on her face.
Cautious? Juliana? Was this another one of her mercurial moods?
"How did it go with your aunts?"
"Fine," he said shortly.
Her smile disappeared. "Is something wrong?"
"Your friend tried to trick me again. Your engaged friend."
"Oh." Her face went white. "Dear heavens. I can explain—"
"I'm sure you can, since you always have a plan to fix everything. But I don't want to hear it tonight. I'm going home."
Still deathly pale, she hesitated a moment.
She hesitated. Juliana hesitated. Confident, self-assured Juliana.
"All right," she said at last. "Can we discuss this tomorrow at Lady Hartley's breakfast?"
"I don't think so. I have more important things to do than attend a silly breakfast." The Institute would be closed since it was Sunday, but perhaps he'd work on the account books. Or clip his nails. Anything would be better than wasting half the day smiling at people he didn't care about. He'd never enjoyed garden parties or balls—he attended them only to placate his mother and, more recently, to see Juliana.
But he didn't want to see Juliana. Or more precisely, to have her see him. To face her in a tent full of nosy spectators.
Hell, he couldn't even face himself.
FORTY
