captured mine in his, I stopped trying.

My breath caught in my chest, right alongside my rapidly racing heart.

What was happening here? This wasn’t the way this night was supposed to go.

I was supposed to be in control, and instead I was…raw.

My nerve endings felt exposed and I shivered as a breeze whipped the loose strands of hair around my face.

It wasn’t just the fact that he was holding my hands, it was all of it. The way we’d talked, the way he’d looked at me…

The way he’d seen me.

I drew in a quick gulp of air as the butterflies in my belly went buck wild, the traitorous little buggers. I didn’t know if it was nerves, or anticipation, or just plain terror. Maybe it was all of the above.

Whatever it was, it made me feel like I was losing touch with reality.

“Rose…” My name was a gentle caress on his tongue. His low voice was beautiful and gravelly and filled with some emotion I couldn’t name.

I kept my gaze fixed on our intertwined hands, like I could find the answers to this confusing mix of emotions in the way our fingers laced together.

“Rose,” he said again, but this time he reached his free hand toward me and gently tipped my chin up as he leaned in and…

He kissed me.

The kiss was soft and sweet and it made my heart ache with a million conflicting emotions. His fingers on my jaw were light, his hold gentle.

He held me like I was precious.

His lips moved over mine softly, his breath a warm breeze against my tongue as my lips parted for him as if we’d done this a million times before.

His tongue teased my lips, exploring and tasting as if this was the first time we’d ever kissed.

First kiss.

The memory of my first kiss—so perfect and so sweet—it mingled with the present moment until I didn’t know where I was or what I was doing. I was lost in the sensations, in the emotions that made a kiss feel like a life-changing event.

When he pulled back, he groaned. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long.”

Me too.

His words pierced the hazy dreamlike fog of perfection and romance, and all at once it came back to me.

Why I was here. Why I was with Jax. Why I’d gone to that stupid party in the first place…

I pulled back so quickly his hands fell and his eyes widened. “Rose, are you—”

“What am I doing?” I whispered it to myself on a rush of air as my heart plummeted into my stomach.

I was a fool. I was such a fool.

He’d planned this from the start. I’d heard him with my own ears less than an hour before saying that he didn’t think I had a heart.

He didn’t like me. He didn’t even respect me. He sure as heck didn’t have real feelings for me. But just now, for a little while there…

He’d fooled me into thinking this was more. That I was more.

And for that I hated him.

I met his confused gaze and felt my stomach churn with bitter disgust—but whether I was most disgusted by him or myself, I couldn’t say. “I have to go.”

“Wait, where are you going to—”

“Not your problem,” I said, my voice cold as ice, my mind finally taking control for once tonight. I snatched up my discarded phone and breathed out a sigh of relief when I saw that Hannah had texted back. I didn’t waste time trying to text, I hit her number and let it ring, ignoring Jax’s voice behind me as I walked away.

“Hannah,” I said loudly enough for him to hear. “Thank goodness you’re around. Look, I’m kind of stuck in a nightmare over here. Think I could get a ride?” I shot one last look over my shoulder to see a stunned Jax watching me, but he made no move to stop me.

“Awesome,” I said, not really hearing Hannah’s response over my pounding heart but counting on my friend to save me when I needed her most. “Texting you the address right now.”

14

Jax

Come Monday I was still trying to figure out what had happened.

By Tuesday I was ready to believe the kiss had been a dream.

By the end of the day on Wednesday I knew for certain—the girl was not speaking to me.

Being ignored by Rose was an entirely new experience.

I didn’t like it.

Oh sure, we’d gone our separate ways these past two years, but she’d always been around. At school. In my life. On the periphery, perhaps, but that counted.

I knew that now.

Because now she was nowhere to be seen.

I didn’t hear her laughter in the hallways or from across the cafeteria. I didn’t catch her flirty smile or see her strutting down the hallway like it was her own personal catwalk.

I was sure she was still doing those things, just…nowhere near me. She seemed to be going out of her way to avoid me.

And that…killed me.

I’d thought watching her walk away sophomore year had stung. Okay, fine, it had hurt like heck. But this…this was worse.

I’d kissed her.

I’d kissed her and that kiss had meant something.

To me, at least.

Maybe it shouldn’t have. I hadn’t meant for it to. I hadn’t even meant to kiss her in the first place. I didn’t even like the girl, but then…

Ugh, I didn’t even know what happened. One minute I despised her. She was the embodiment of everything I couldn’t stand. Shallow, flakey, superficial and vain… And then she wasn’t.

Like the world had been flipped upside down, the girl I’d thought I’d known was replaced by someone else. Someone real and honest and…snarky.

A girl I remembered.

Someone I liked. A lot.

Too much.

She’d been genuine and relatable and for the first time in a very long time. Heck, the first time since Simone had invited me to her house and we’d forged our friendship—I’d felt a real connection.

But what I’d felt wasn’t friendship. Or…maybe it was? But that kiss…

That had not felt like the kiss of a

Добавить отзыв
ВСЕ ОТЗЫВЫ О КНИГЕ В ИЗБРАННОЕ

0

Вы можете отметить интересные вам фрагменты текста, которые будут доступны по уникальной ссылке в адресной строке браузера.

Отметить Добавить цитату