‘Or, maybe the baby was put into foster care.’
Lauren sighs. ‘Don’t you think I would have known if my family were involved in this in any way? Don’t you think my father would have moved heaven and earth to keep you with him once he found out what had happened to your mother?’
‘Maybe he killed her,’ says Jess, as casually as if she’d said, Do you want a sugar in that?
Lauren can’t help but laugh, yet inside a bolt shoots across her chest, sending shockwaves up her neck and into her head. ‘You can’t be serious.’
Jess fixes her with an intense gaze. ‘Why not?’
‘My father was a lot of things, but he wasn’t a murderer.’
‘How would you know? How would any of us know what someone is capable of, until they find themselves in that unenviable position? People can make snap judgements. Maybe your dad just snapped.’
‘It was a mistake coming here,’ says Lauren. ‘I thought it would help you find closure, but it seems it’s only served to open up new wounds.’ She takes Jess’s hands in hers. ‘This is not your story. You were adopted by a loving couple who loved you as if you were their own. Why don’t you focus on them, remember what they were to you, because you’re never going to find what you’re looking for here.’
Jess nods her head solemnly and looks to the floor.
‘They were everything I could have wished for and more.’
‘Exactly,’ says Lauren. ‘Don’t ever lose sight of that.’
‘Until they told me I was adopted.’
The hairs on Lauren’s arms prickle as she imagines how hard that must have been; for both Jess and her parents.
‘How old were you when you found out?’ asks Lauren softly, wondering if there’s ever a ‘good’ age to be given that kind of information.
‘I’d just turned eighteen.’
It hits Lauren for the first time how it must feel to live a whole life before being told that everything you thought was true wasn’t. It occurs to her then that the same could be said for Kate, who has had over thirty years of her life shattered, her love and respect for her father smashed into a million pieces. No wonder she doesn’t want to believe it.
‘How did they break it to you?’ asks Lauren, hoping that it was gently.
Jess looks off into the distance. ‘They sat me down, just before I went off to university,’ she says. ‘They said that I’d always been their special girl and that no matter what they were about to tell me, nothing would ever change.’ A tear rolls down her cheek.
Lauren’s heart feels as if it might break.
‘They told me how proud they were of the woman I’d become and that seeing me go off to university was a dream come true. But that there was something that I needed to know.’
‘Why did they decide to tell you then?’
Jess shrugs her shoulders. ‘I guess they were worried that I’d somehow find out another way. I was going out into the big wide world for the first time.’
‘And how did you feel?’ asks Lauren.
‘Broken,’ says Jess. ‘I can’t explain how it feels to discover that your parents aren’t who you thought they were. You’re probably feeling that in some small way now; having spent all these years thinking Harry was perfect, immortal even, only to find he was anything but – quite literally.’
Lauren smiles wryly. ‘I never thought my father was perfect.’
‘What happened between you?’ says Jess, tilting her head to one side. ‘I don’t mean to talk out of turn, but I can sense an animosity there.’
‘We had our issues and our differences,’ says Lauren. ‘They were deeply rooted and were difficult to see past, but we tried to, especially in the last few years.’
‘And Kate?’ asks Jess. ‘Did she have the same relationship?’
‘Oh God, no!’ exclaims Lauren. ‘They were as thick as thieves – always were.’
‘That must have been difficult,’ says Jess.
‘For me, yes. I felt I was his testing ground, the one he got to practise his parenting on, and she was the one who benefitted from the mistakes he made.’
Lauren wipes the tears that unexpectedly spring from her eyes.
‘Hence why Kate’s not as open to the idea of him having had an illegitimate child,’ says Jess.
‘Exactly,’ says Lauren sniffing. ‘But she’s going to have to get used to it, because you’re unequivocal proof that he did.’
Jess’s phone rings and she pulls it out of her bag. ‘Excuse me,’ she says, taking a couple of steps away before answering it.
‘Hi,’ she says. There’s a pause as she listens to the caller at the other end. ‘Do you even need to ask?’ she says. ‘You know I’d love to.’
As she turns around, Lauren can see her eyes sparkling and wonders who she’s talking to.
‘Okay,’ she goes on. ‘I’ll meet you there.’
‘You look happy,’ says Lauren when she ends the call. ‘Good news?’
Jess nods enthusiastically.
Lauren smiles. ‘It’s none of my business, but is there a guy on the scene?’
‘There’s someone at work,’ says Jess, coyly. ‘I don’t know what’s going to come of it but . . .’
‘You really like him,’ says Lauren, finishing the sentence for her.
Jess nods. ‘Yes, but it’s complicated. He’s my boss so there’s a lot that can go wrong.’
‘As long as he looks after you and treats you right, then he gets my vote.’
‘He’s just asked me to meet him in Birmingham.’
‘What, now?’ exclaims Lauren.
Jess nods. ‘It’s a work thing, but it looks like it’s going to be an over-nighter.’
Lauren raises her eyebrows. ‘Will this be the first time you’ve done an over-nighter together?’ She puts the pertinent phrase in speech marks with her fingers.
Jess smiles. ‘Yes!’
Butterflies flutter in Lauren’s stomach on Jess’s behalf as she remembers the intensity of emotions that she once felt for Justin. Still feels for Justin, so it seems.
‘I’m so excited for you,’ she can’t help herself from saying.
‘Oh
