It was probably the most I’d ever said to Ash, but it felt good to talk about it to her. Good to finally admit things in my life had been fucked up.
“That’s… awful, Ror.”
I finished up her braid and put my hand out. She took the hairband off her wrist and gave it to me. I tied off her hair and she turned to me.
“It was… the way they treated me made it hard for me to have anyone touch me. Fifteen years of it. I felt helpless most of the time as if it would never end.”
I slipped my hands under her t-shirt and wrapped them around her waist, running my thumbs across her skin. Her beautiful, pearlescent skin.
“Did Quinn…”
I stiffened. What Quinn had done about Marian and Trevor wasn’t something she should know about. Wasn’t something anyone should know about. Better left in the past where it belonged. They couldn’t hurt anyone any longer. That was all that mattered.
“Quinn did what he had to. That’s all you need to know.”
“Ror—”
“No, little star. You have to understand there’s only so much I can talk about right now.”
Her eyes clouded over.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to push you.”
I leant towards her, resting my head against hers.
“Don’t apologise. It’ll just take me time to tell you it all.”
“I know.”
I reached over and turned out the light before pulling her down under the covers with me. She curled herself around me, which should make my skin crawl, but it didn’t. Her hands brushed over my chest making me shiver. I loved this girl to fucking death. She pushed me, but she did it because she cared enough. She wanted to help me get better. To be free of all the pain and fucking strife.
“Ror?”
“Mmm?”
“Thank you… I think I understand you a little better now.”
I reached up and cupped her face, pulling her into me so I could kiss her. Her lips were so soft and she immediately melted into me, moaning a little as my tongue curled around hers. Her lithe body made me feel things. Everything. I wanted her.
“Little star,” I breathed, hands drifting under her t-shirt.
“Ror, I can’t take any more brutality.”
“Shh, I won’t hurt you again.”
I didn’t know how I was going to fucking manage, but somehow I would keep the beast contained. Somehow I could give Ash a little more gentleness. I wanted inside her that much. I needed it.
She let me pull off her clothes, leaving her bare. My hands roamed over her, feeling her relax into my gentle touch. I pressed her onto her back before crawling over her. My hand was between her legs, coaxing and stroking her until she was soaking for me as I kissed her.
“Ror,” she whimpered.
“You want it?”
“Please.”
I tugged off my boxers and pressed against her, sliding into her inch by inch. Slowly but surely, letting her adjust.
“What else do you want from me?”
I almost froze at her words.
“What do you mean?”
“Sexually… what else do you want? Is there more you need?”
I gripped her hip and sunk deeper. There were many things, but only very few I’d never tried with anyone.
“You’re asking me this now?”
Her hands wrapped around my back, tugging me closer as our chests brushed together.
“You’re being gentle for me… So I want to know what you need.”
I buried my face in her neck, kissing her soft skin as I pulled back and thrust inside her again. I dragged one of her hands off my back and entwined our fingers together on the bed.
“I don’t need anything else.”
Liar.
“I don’t believe you. I won’t run. You know that.”
If you tell her, she might.
I thrust harder as her legs wrapped around mine.
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“Yes… tell me.”
She arched into me, her body trembling. I took a breath. Ash had never run. She always stayed and listened. She understood.
“I want… to hunt you down.”
The truth was on the tip of my tongue. The truth about the fantasy I’d had for so long. One I never thought I’d ever act out with anyone. It didn’t seem right to want it.
“I want to chase you… and when I catch up to you, I want you to fight me and pretend you don’t want it even though we’ll both know you do.”
Ash didn’t say anything for a long moment. Her hand on my back tightened.
“You mean… you want to pretend you’re forcing me.”
“I know it’s fucked up, little star. I know I shouldn’t want to. It’s not as though I’d really force anyone against their will. Not ever.”
“Shh.” She stroked my back. “Shh, I know you wouldn’t. I know you’d never do that.” Then she began to thrust back against me, her hips arching up and asking for more. “It’d just be pretend… like we were playing a game.”
“Yes,” I groaned, thrusting deeper as she contracted around my cock.
“And you want me to tell you I don’t want it… that I don’t want you to fuck me.”
Her nails dug into my back, which only made me fuck her harder.
“Fuck yes, little star. I want you to fight me.”
My hand slid between us, finding her little bud and stroking it.
“And beg you to stop.”
I pressed my face into her skin, breathing her in as flames licked up my spine. I was so fucking close already.
“And tell me you don’t want me.”
“Oh god, Ror.”
“Fuck.”
She cried out, her body trembling with the force of her climax and I couldn’t help letting go. It was everything. I’d never once had such… vanilla sex before, but with Ash it felt special. It felt like we were making love and that
