‘Oh, my dear, how uncomfortable for you! But I might be doing more harm than good in speaking out. It is only conjecture. I have no proof, you see.’
‘Then I pray you will tell me what you believe is the truth.’ Natalya clasped her hands tightly together. ‘You have always been such a kind friend to me, ma’am. Anything you can tell me would help.’
After an inward struggle Mrs Ancrum nodded. ‘Very well. I think your mother was a young lady called Elizabeth Faringdon. She was the only child of an old schoolfriend of mine. Eliza was a sweet gel and I was very fond of her. Her mother died when she was very young and Eliza used to spend a great deal of time with us at Ancrum Hall. We were never blessed with children, you see, and it was such a pleasure to have her in the house. Then her father married again and the new Mrs Faringdon naturally wanted her stepdaughter at home with her.
‘I saw little of her after that, until her come-out. I was in London for her first Season but, bless the child, she was so giddy with excitement she had little time for an old lady like myself and the Faringdons did not encourage her to visit. You see, they had great hopes of her marrying well. I believe there was an earl and a marquess showing an interest, but, as I understand it, Elizabeth only had eyes for one man.’
Natalya caught her breath. ‘My father?’
‘Yes. I believe so. He was a diplomat from one of the embassies.’
‘You know his name?’
‘Unfortunately not. I saw him only once, when he was walking in Hyde Park with Elizabeth, but we were never introduced. He was a good-looking young man, but her parents were against her marrying a foreigner.’ The old lady shook her head, her mouth turned down. ‘It was very badly handled. They tried to force a match with the Marquess, but Elizabeth ran off with her diplomat.’
‘Is that all you know, ma’am?’ asked Natalya, when the silence had stretched on for an agonisingly long time.
‘All I know for certain,’ she replied cautiously. ‘She never contacted me, you see. I heard the diplomat fled the country and Elizabeth was cast off without a penny.’
Mrs Ancrum stopped, her face working as old and painful memories intruded.
‘I wish with all my heart that I had made more effort to tell Eliza that I was her friend, that she might confide in me during that short London Season. But there, I thought it best not to interfere. The Faringdons would tell me nothing, save that they had disowned her, irrevocably. I tried to find Elizabeth, but without success, and later I heard that she had died giving birth to a daughter.’
‘To me.’ Natalya put her hand to her cheek. ‘The only thing I have ever known is that my mother died when I was born.’
‘Sadly, that is not an uncommon occurrence, my dear.’ The old woman sighed. ‘When the Pridhams brought you to Bath four years ago I was struck by the resemblance between you and Elizabeth. Not in colouring—you have that from your father, I think—but occasionally you have the look of her, the way she had of tilting her head to one side if something intrigued her. And you have her laugh, I think.’
‘But you cannot be sure.’
‘No. Alas, my dear, I cannot prove anything. Oh, I asked questions, but the Pridhams denied any link. However, I was made aware in no uncertain terms that if rumours about this ever got out, if you ever learned of it, you would be removed from Bath. Their reaction convinced me you were Elizabeth’s child, but I could not bring myself to tell you, if it meant I should never see you again.’
Natalya bit her lip. ‘And my parents did not marry?’
‘I do not know. Perhaps I should have tried harder at the time to discover what had become of you, but Ancrum’s health was deteriorating and we were obliged to move here in order that he might take the waters. Then, when you came to Bath, all those years later, I was afraid to look too hard, lest I should find irrefutable proof that you had been born on the wrong side of the blanket, as they say. I decided the best thing I could do was to be on hand to give you my support.’
‘Your friendship has done much to silence the gossip,’ said Natalya. ‘For that I am very grateful.’
‘At my age one does not worry about the niceties of a wedding ceremony. And besides that...’ Her fingers tightened on the arms of her chair and she added fiercely, ‘You have more breeding in your little finger than most of the so-called ladies of my acquaintance!’
Natalya sighed. ‘Society would not agree with you, ma’am. I cannot expect to make a respectable marriage if my birth is in question.’
‘Nonsense. That will not matter to a man who truly loves you!’
‘Perhaps not, but it will matter to his friends and his family.’
Natalya saw from the look on her elderly friend’s face that she acknowledged the truth of that. Any man who married her, if she proved to be illegitimate, would be shunned, pilloried by society. How could any couple expect to be happy under such circumstances, no matter how much in love they were?
Mrs Ancrum gave a loud sigh. ‘I am so sorry, Natalya. I should not have told you.’
‘Yes, you should and I am very glad you did, ma’am. Now I know the truth, I can plan for my future.’
‘Natalya, we do not know if it is the truth!’
‘I cannot
