She wanted to tell him she loved him too. Part of her did, she was sure. But the part of her that still feared trusting him poked at her and made her hold back. She had no doubt that Kevin cared about her. But love? She wasn’t sure he truly understood what that meant. Even if he did, was he really ready for the commitment he said he wanted?
“You okay?” he whispered as he nuzzled her neck. “No freak-outs in my bed. Only good things happen here.”
Her laugh took her by surprise. It bubbled up and pushed past whatever was blocking her chest and throat. “Someone’s full of himself as usual,” she said.
“Ah, but there’s no denying it.”
Just like that, he put her at ease with his simple flirtation. “Are you as good in other rooms?” she asked.
“I’m good everywhere.”
“Prove it.”
“Give me a few minutes and I will.”
She slapped his ass. “You don’t need a few minutes for what I want. I’m hungry. Go find me some food.”
He groaned, but pushed off the bed. “As you wish.”
* * *
Kevin left Kathy lying across his bed as he stepped into his underwear. He walked to the kitchen wanting to kick his own ass. How the fuck did those words slip out of his mouth? He’d never spoken those words to a woman. Ever.
Yet buried inside Kathy, he couldn’t hold them back. Even though he knew it was a mistake and she would freak out.
And freak the fuck out she did.
He opened the refrigerator to look at his options. He should’ve thought about food earlier and maybe stopped at the store, but everything with Brent had just gotten progressively worse this afternoon and nothing else entered his head. He had a loaf of bread and eggs, so he could make breakfast. It was better than cold cereal.
As he moved around the kitchen prepping the food, he heard Kathy moving and the water running in the bathroom. He gave her space to wrap her head around what he’d said. He meant every word of it. Although he’d thought saying it would be scary, he felt pretty damn good right now.
He scrambled the eggs and made toast. He set butter on the counter next to the orange juice. For the first time, he wished he had a kitchen table. He didn’t have anywhere to eat. On the rare occasions he ate at home, he stood at the kitchen counter or sat on the couch in front of the TV. He never thought about sharing a meal with someone else as something he might be missing out on.
Now he was thinking just that.
Kathy came into the kitchen wearing one of his T-shirts with her hair piled high on her head. A few springy curls escaped and danced around her face. She took the glass from his hand and sipped his juice. She eyed the pan on the stove. “Hmm . . . better than I expected.”
“What did you expect?”
“A bag of chips and a bottle of beer.”
“You don’t like beer.”
“I know,” she said with a smile, and kissed him.
“You think that little of me?” He scooped the eggs onto two plates.
“Nah. I’m just joking. I actually thought you might have leftover pizza in your fridge. Or a frozen one. Pizza seems to be your go-to meal.”
“Not mine. It’s your go-to meal.”
She took the plate he handed her and studied him. “So we’re always eating pizza because I like it?”
“I don’t have anything against pizza. But you really like it.”
“You’re a pretty good boyfriend.”
He sighed and shook his head. “We need to work on your vocabulary. ‘Pretty good’ is an insufficient modifier. I think for Christmas I’m getting you a thesaurus.”
She took a bite of eggs. “Maybe you just need to inspire me to come up with a better way to describe you.”
“You’re plenty inspired when you’re screaming my name in bed.”
She laughed. “That I am.”
They stood in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, eating breakfast at night. Kathy seemed to regain her composure, and Kevin wasn’t sure where to go from here. Just pretend he hadn’t admitted he was madly in love with her?
“So what are you going to do about what’s-his-name? Brent, was it?”
Looked like they were ignoring his feelings. “I don’t know. It’s not like I’m his boss. We’re basically equals in different departments.”
“But he does have a boss.”
“I’m sure he does.”
“So go over his head.”
“Seems like a douchey thing to do.”
“More douchey than ditching you at an event he was supposed to be in charge of? And ruining our date on top of it?” She scooped up the last of her eggs and set her plate in the sink.
“You make a damn good point.” But he’d never been the kind of guy to tattle on someone. He preferred to handle things himself.
Kathy stood close and laid a palm on his chest. “Do me a favor and don’t punch him out.”
Her fingers were distracting him, so he held her hand still. “What makes you think I’d do that?”
“If I know anything about you O’Malley boys it’s that you lead with your fists. Even when you’re just messing around it’s shove and push and slap. I can only imagine what happens if you’re truly pissed off. And tonight, you were pissed.”
“Was it that obvious?”
“Not to everyone, I don’t think. I saw it in your body language, but your voice was very smooth politician. Mayor Park would’ve been proud.”
“You don’t say it like it’s a good thing.”
“It’s unnerving to watch you like that. You become someone different. Constantly changing. It’s as if I’m not sure which version is the real you.”
He slid his arms around her, pulling her close. Her comment hit home. There were times he wasn’t sure who he was. “When I’m with you, I promise I’m real. The rest of the time, I’m whoever I need to be.”
Her
