I looked in the mirror again. It was just so beautiful. “Thanks, I love it.” I said.
“And your mother is just going to die when she sees you in that. You look so lovely.” She didn’t mean anything by it, of course. How could she have known? The words pierced through me like a harpoon to my heart. I raced off the platform and nearly tripped on my way back to the dressing room. In tears, I pulled and tugged trying to get the dress off, which now felt like it was glued to me. As fast as I could, I pulled my jeans and T-shirt back on. My shirt was backward, and I didn’t care as I dashed from the dressing room. I race-walked all the way out to my car, where I then sat and cried.
The night of the prom, I watched a Harry Potter movie marathon on television.
Chapter Eleven
I was wiping some cream cheese frosting off the corner of my mouth when Mrs. Carter walked into the living room. We had taken our carrot cake and coffee from the dining room, and I hoped she wasn’t going to get upset at us.
“Dessert on the couch?” she said with her right eyebrow raised. “I love it.” After clapping her hands together she reached for a plate. She sat in a big recliner that almost swallowed her as she ate.
Nicholas was playing with some model cars on the floor. “Can we watch TV?”
“Not until seven,” Mrs. Carter answered.
“Aw, Mom. Why?” He crashed a police car into a fire truck.
Mrs. Carter took a sip of coffee. “Because the TV doesn’t come on until just before bedtime.” Her tone was solemn.
I watched Brandon walk over to Nicholas and ruffle up the hair on top of his head. “Listen squirt, later on we’ll play gin rummy together, okay?”
“Yeah!” Nicholas shouted and raced out of the room with an armful of cars.
Brandon sat down next to me again. “He loves gin rummy.” He took his last bite of cake. “I always let him win.”
I felt a warmth creep up through my belly.
“You’re a good brother,” Mrs. Carter said. She didn’t look at him when she said it. Her face was still distant. Probably thinking of Bobby. “Marissa, how about your family?” she asked me.
My right knee began bobbing up and down. “Yes, I love to play gin rummy too.” I swallowed hard.
“That’s nice.” She cocked her head to the side as she looked at me. “I meant, what about your parents? What do they do?”
My nerves were starting to creep out. I bit my bottom lip. It was merely seconds, but I felt like everything in the room had frozen. The only thing I could focus on were her eyes, staring at me. Questioning me. I wanted to seep into the couch, never to be seen again, like a lost sock. Still unsure of what to say, I opened my mouth to begin to speak, just as the phone rang. The house phone was ringing loud and clear, breaking the silence. Thank goodness, I thought.
“Excuse me,” Mrs. Carter said as she got up to answer it.
Feeling like my legs were going numb, I readjusted myself in my seat. I caught Brandon’s eyes, and he smiled at me. “So mystery girl, what are the details of your life?”
What did he mean by that? I couldn’t just open up here, in his house, with his mother ten feet away. How could I just blurt out the fact that my mom died of cancer? Even if he could understand, and even though he probably would. My mind played tug-o-war with itself. He was grieving; he lost his brother. If anyone would understand, it would be him. When I looked into his soft hazel eyes, instead of feeling calm I felt panic. A tremble like that of an earthquake shook through my entire body, and I did the only thing I could think of. I ran.
“I’m so sorry. I have to go.” I stood and headed for the front door.
Brandon’s long gait followed me. “Hey, Marissa, wait.”
I pulled my coat off the hook near the front door and slung it over my arm. “I’m sorry,” I blurted out again.
“What’s wrong? Why are you bolting?” Brandon stood in front of me, partially blocking the door.
“I-I’m an idiot,” I stammered. “I totally forgot about this project I have due, like tomorrow. I… I haven’t even started typing my notes up for it. I’m so sorry.” I could feel the sting from the tears that were beginning to well up. This wasn’t the time or the place. I had to get out of there, and fast. My hand reached for the doorknob, which was just behind his back.
Even though my eyes were on the door I could feel him looking at me. I stared at his chin for a moment then let my gaze reach his eyes — those eyes that seemed to look through me. It felt like they could see the lie, and they wanted to see the truth. A truth I couldn’t let escape. Not now. Not yet.
“Thanks for dinner,” I said before shifting my body so he had to move from the door. While I sprinted to my car, I never looked back. But I knew he was watching me.
****
It was one a.m, and I was staring at my computer. My eyes were strained, and I still kept staring at the images on the screen. Fuzzy, grainy images of Marc; the only other person on Earth who could understand what I was going through. Marc was the other person who lost his mother, our mother. She was the one who kept our little family together. She made us eat dinner together every night no matter what. She made us write apology notes to each other if we used the word “hate” directed at one another. She made us tell each other why we were thankful to
