His brow grows heavier. “So, it’s true?”
I take a breath. “Yes,” I answer. “I’m moving to New York.”
“Why?” he asks.
I shrug. “Why not?”
He stutters at first. “You have everything here. Your family. Your friends.”
“My family is fine. My parents are living their best lives. My brother’s going to college next year, not that he ever needed me for anything to begin with. And my friends? Come on, they don’t need me anymore.”
“That’s not true.”
“Nora has Clive and their kinky new lifestyle. Trix has Lance, Haley, and the baby soon enough. They’ll be fine without me. I’m mostly just a fifth wheel these days, anyway. There’s nothing keeping me here.”
“What about me?” he asks.
“What about you?”
“I think I have a right to know if my wife is moving across the country!”
I shake my head. “I’m not your wife, Robbie.”
“That’s…” He pauses, stung by my words. “That’s not what I meant.”
“No, I think you said exactly what you meant,” I say, keeping calm. “I thought we were on the same page about this.”
“What page?” he asks. “The page where you dangle everything I’ve ever wanted in front of me just to bail whenever you felt like it? That page?”
“No strings attached. Remember? That’s what this was. You said it first.”
“Well, that’s not good enough for me!”
“It was working just fine for me.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it, Mel.”
“No, it’s not. Rob, I left you.”
“I never left you,” he says.
“Exactly my point.” I sigh. “I left you… but I can’t go anywhere in this city without being reminded of you. Or seeing you. I want to move on, but I can’t do that here.”
Robbie goes quiet, his lips pressed tightly together.
“Look, can we…” I raise my hands, surrendering. “Can we not do this right now?”
“Sure.” Robbie scoffs. “Let’s change the subject. How about we talk about how you lied to my face about this? Really liven up the mood in here.”
I bite down, my gut churning. “You’re really going to lecture me about lying? You?”
He flexes his jaw. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what? Ask an extremely valid question?”
“That’s not fair,” he says. “You know how hard I’ve worked to be who I am now.”
“And I’m just supposed to forget who you were before?” I ask, my voice breaking. “Just forgive you like magic?”
“Someday, yes. I hoped we’d get there, but we can’t if you’re not here, Melanie.”
“Wow,” I whisper, threatened by tears. “So, one of us has a picture in their head for how we should be and the other one isn’t there. Sounds really fucking familiar.”
“Well, what do you see?” he asks, leaning forward again. “Where do you see us going? I’m here now. Let’s do this.”
I look away. “Rob, please.”
“We’ll work toward it together. You and me. We’ll try again.”
“I don’t want to,” I say, my words coming quickly. “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to try again. I can’t.”
“Yes, you can.”
A tear falls down my cheek. I wipe it away, silence falling over me.
“It won’t be like before,” he says, his face screwing up. “And I know you’ve heard me say that a hundred times, but I mean it. This time will be the time I get it right. I promise, Melanie.”
I exhale slowly, completely. I want to believe him. Part of me even needs to, but I can’t bring myself to fall for it again.
I push out of my chair. “I think I should go…”
“No.” He stands up, too. “Mel, wait.”
“We want different things.”
“That’s not true.”
“I mean, I want to leave and you don’t want me to leave, so it’s kinda true right now.”
Robbie steps toward me. “Please, don’t leave. I want to talk about this.”
I ease back, crossing my arms. “Don’t…”
He stops, giving me space. “Melanie, I know you. I love you. I knew that if you were here with me again and it was perfect, you’d realize that this is us. It’s always been us.”
“Is that why you did this?” I ask. “Because you thought I’d change my mind and stay in Chicago with you?”
“Yes,” he says.
I step around the other side of the table. “I need to get out of here…”
“Melanie, stop.”
“I can’t do this.”
Robbie quickens his pace and cuts me off from the door. “We’re meant to be together, Mel.”
“Rob, please.”
“Nora can see it. Trix can see it. Your parents. Me. You are the only one who can’t.”
“And you are the only one who’s ever made me feel hopeless,” I say, letting the tears fall. “You think I don’t know this? I do. You’re the only man I’ve ever wanted, but I can’t let myself fall for you again because it’ll be up to me to pick up the pieces again when you inevitably fuck it up.”
“I won’t,” he says. “Not this time.”
“I would like my coat, please.”
“Melanie, don’t leave.”
“Please.” I look at him through tears. “Just let me go.”
“Are you coming back?” he asks.
My throat tightens. “I don’t think we should do this anymore,” I whisper.
Robbie deflates. His face goes hard and expressionless as he reaches behind him and grabs my coat off the door. “Goodnight, Mel,” he says, handing it over.
I take it. “Goodnight, Rob,” I say, biting down to keep myself from sobbing.
He steps out of the way, letting me leave.
Twenty-Nine
Robbie
I rush up the stairs, taking them two at a time until I reach Trix’s floor. A neighbor shuffles to the side as I pass by, nervously glancing at me before heading down the way I came. It’s not my intention to freak anyone out, but I can’t apologize right now.
I need answers.
I roll a fist and pound on Trix’s door. The sound echoes throughout the empty hall, but I can hear someone moving on the other side of the door. I knock again.
“Trix, open up!” I say.
The lock turns, and the door opens, but it’s not Trix standing there with a baseball bat clenched in her hand.
“Hey, Lance,” I say.
He stands tall. “It’s Robbie,” he says, but not to me.
Trix quickly appears over his bare shoulder
