My leather skirt and gray peasant’s shirt were genuine, Wult-made articles from Faythander. I hated wearing them both. They reminded me too much of what I wanted to forget. But, I was too poor to rent any of the nice costumes, so I was stuck wearing my authentic garb. Every time I got a compliment, I cringed. However, I did my best to look happy for Doc Hill.
“I hope I’m not being too forward,” he said, “but I’m concerned for your well-being.”
“I’m fine.”
“Are you?”
“Yes! Never better. Really.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Is that why you hung up on me the last time I called?”
“I was upset. It happens.”
“Yet you’ve never done anything like that before, and you had no reason to be angry.”
“You accused me of having anger issues!” My voice rose.
“Do you?”
“Of course not. I’m a therapist. I know how to handle stuff like this.”
He smirked. “Stuff like what?”
I inhaled, feeling my anger bubble inside, screaming to be let free, and then exhaled. “Fine,” I said. “Maybe I am having some issues.”
“Would you like to talk about them?”
I’m not happy. I’m lonely. My mom and dad are gone someplace exotic and I don’t want to know what they’re doing anyway. I don’t have Brent anymore.
I miss that stupid Viking brute so bad that I cry myself to sleep at night.
I couldn’t tell Doc Hill any of that, so I settled on something else. “Now isn’t a good time. Maybe we can talk later?”
“We’ve both heard that excuse a few times, haven’t we? Tell me, what do you do when you try to counsel a patient who’s as stubborn as you?”
“I don’t know. My patients aren’t usually this stubborn.”
He sighed. “You’re making this quite difficult.”
I didn’t answer.
“Have you tried to go back?” he asked.
“Back?” I asked, confused.
“Yes. It seems that your problems started shortly after you returned from fairy world, so whatever is bothering you must have happened while you were there. If that’s the case, then the only way to remedy this situation is for you to return and fix whatever must have happened there. You have to go back.”
“No,” I answered. “I won’t go back. That’s out of the question.”
“Why?”
“Because I won’t. Besides, you’ve never believed in Fairy World to begin with, so why are you suddenly okay with it?”
“I’ve always treated it is as a plausible alternate dimension—or at least a healthy delusion. However, as it is, I’m no longer certain that I can classify this fairy realm as healthy. I’ve come to check on you, yes, but I have also come to make sure you’re not mentally compromised. I’ve been referring my patients to you for almost two years. I need to know that I still can.”
“I see.” I closed my eyes, wondering if this day could get any worse. I’d been verbally assaulted, belittled, had my prized possessions thrown in the mud, and now I was in danger of losing my job. “I’ve told you I’m fine. What else can I do to convince you?”
“Come in to my office for a psychological exam.”
“Out of the question.”
“Why?”
“If you haven’t noticed, I’m a little broke at present. I can’t leave my shop for a whole day just to go get evaluated.”
He let out a long sigh. “Then I will conduct the evaluation here if need be, although it’s not my first choice, and it will have to wait until tomorrow.”
“I don’t need to be evaluated. I’m fine, and I don’t understand why you won’t believe me.”
He gave me a shrewd look. “If you want me to believe you, then tell me what happened in the fairy realm.”
I didn’t want to remember. I’d been trying so hard to forget. Dragging it out again seemed counterintuitive, but I knew he was right. If I ever wanted to heal, then I had to face my demons.
“I was supposed to help restore the magic,” I said quietly. “The goblins burned down a magical tree, which would have destroyed magic forever, except that the tree left behind a bloom. I was tasked with finding where the bloom should be kept so the magic could be brought back.”
Dr. Hill nodded.
“We knew the bloom belonged on the outer isles somewhere, so we found a ship and made it there. Restoring the magic wasn’t easy, but we managed to accomplish it, only to find out the real reason the goblins had taken away the magic. They didn’t need it gone forever, just long enough to kill the elven king.”
“Kill their king? How did the elves react?”
“Not well. The elven princess used a spell to eradicate the goblins—every single one. It’s not something I like to contemplate.”
“An entire race was destroyed by a single person?”
“Yes.”
“And is this the cause of your anxiety?”
I wanted to lie and tell him yes, but I’d never been a skilled liar, and he’d figure it out sooner or later. “Actually, there’s a bit more.”
He nodded.
“I met someone there. He led me to believe I meant something to him, but that turned out to be false. I didn’t want it to end, although I knew it most likely would. He’s a prince—a king now, actually—and I’m a nobody, so it shouldn’t have been such a surprise that he chose his kingdom over me. But I also don’t understand why I can’t get over it. I’ve had plenty of time, so I should be over him by now, shouldn’t I?”
“For some, healing comes quickly, but perhaps that’s because their attachment was never very strong. I suspect that your attachment was stronger than you admit, and it will be much harder than you assume for you to heal. However, the time will come when you’ll no longer think of him, and perhaps you’ll find someone better to replace him with.”
“You know, you’re actually making me feel more depressed.”
“Why? Do you still wish to have a relationship with this man?”
“No,
