Guy made sure to match his gait with Evan as they walked up the sidewalk toward Darryl’s house. While they waited for someone to answer the door, he put his hands in his pockets. Hopefully, it would signal a casual air and hide the fact that his feet felt like lead.
Darryl opened the door. “Yo, G, I can’t believe you’re here! Get in here, man.” Darryl, gave him a hug, accompanied by a back clap. He was surprised at how strong his friend had become. His lunch threatened to come back up with the pounding on his back.
“Hey, D. How’ve you been?”
“Good, good. My practice is doing so well that we’re looking for another doctor to join our team.”
“Congrats, man.” He smiled stiffly. “You’ve done well.”
“So have you, Sheriff.” His friend nudged him in the ribs and cracked a laugh.
If Guy didn’t know any better, he’d think Darryl was trying to get back at him for ignoring his calls. The hug and the nudge were just a little too rough. But he refused to show it. “Please, tell me the ladies did the cooking and not you.”
“Sppppsh. I can grill. Especially in the spring time.”
“He does all right.”
Guy froze at the sound of the sophisticated voice. He would recognize it anywhere. He turned and gave a nod to Michelle. “Hey.”
He stared at her, at loss for words. Even though he’d been prepared to see her, it in no way lessened the full impact of her presence. The red dress she wore gave her an ethereal quality as if she held mysteries he desired to answer. He blinked and a fist clinched in his pocket. Why was he thinking about her like that? His lunch curdled in his stomach and struggled to make it the rest of the way up. “D, where’s your restroom?”
Darryl pointed down the hall. “First door on the left.”
He rushed out of the room, feeling like the ghost of Christmas past chased after him. Only the ghost was his late wife. For a moment, he had wondered. Wondered what his life would be like if he hadn’t ditched Michelle. If he had remained a gentleman.
Guy turned on the faucet and splashed water over his face, but it didn’t help. He still felt hot. Still could see how much the red color deepened her honey-smooth skin tone. He slammed his hand against the wall.
“Charlene, Charlene, Charlene,” he muttered. The words fell like a benediction, but he knew he wasn’t talking to God. He was pleading with his brain to recall any memory of his wife. Any memory at all so his body did not betray her memory.
But didn’t you betray Michelle first?
Guilt clamped his mouth shut. He stared in the mirror, noting the dark bags under his eyes. His temples had begun to sprout a few gray hairs. A new one seemed to appear each year on the anniversary of Charlene’s death. Just so happened it coincided with the twins’ birthday.
He inhaled, slowly exhaling as he gave himself a mental pep talk. You can do this. Listen to what they want to say and leave. Then you’ll be done.
A knock sounded on the door startling him out of his reverie. “We’re about to bless the food, G, you coming?”
“Be right out, Darryl.” He grabbed a paper towel off the counter and wiped his face and dried his hands. “Here goes nothing,” he whispered.
Chapter Six
Michelle watched as Chloe turned the pages in her Bible. She was proud of her friend. The girl overcame a past that would cripple most people. No matter how many times Michelle studied the Word, she couldn’t imagine having the courage to lead a Bible study.
Lord, please help my girl out. I know she’s nervous, so please give her the words she needs. Thanks.
She bit her lip as the prayer ended. Talking to Him still felt weird. Even if it was for the benefit of someone else. Michelle sighed. Who was she kidding? Praying for others was the only thing she permitted herself to do. She had no right seeking prayers for herself. Not after what she’d done.
Ever since her conversation with Jo, her mind had been relentless in reminding Michelle of her sins. Years of stuffing it down and one little conversation brought it right back to the surface. It had been the biggest mistake of her life. If she could somehow go back and undue it, she would. But time offered no rewrites. She was stuck with the weight of her choice, her sin. And I can’t atone for it.
But wasn’t that what forgiveness was all about? Didn’t God offer grace for people’s sins?
“Tonight, I want to study grace.” Chloe’s voice started softly but ended on a strong note.
How did You do that? What were the odds? She stared down at her phone, baffled by her churning thoughts.
“Why grace?” Jo asked.
“Because I don’t think we understand what it means.” Chloe answered.
Darryl frowned. “It means to go easy on another person.” He looked around the table. “Doesn’t it?”
They all chuckled.
“That’s my point, exactly. We all have different beliefs of what grace means based on our life experiences.” Chloe paused, her brow wrinkling in concentration. “I believe if we truly understand what it means according to God, then our lives will be lived out differently.”
Michelle swallowed. Suddenly, she had a feeling tonight’s study wouldn’t simply be enlightening. She twirled the ring on her right hand absentmindedly as she did an internet search on the definition of grace with the other hand. “I’m seeing words like favor.” She looked up and her gaze connected with Guy’s.
He quickly looked away.
He still can’t look at me.
“Nice try, but that’s not what the Bible tells us.” Chloe smiled
