Decisions, decisions. He crossed his hands over his stomach. “I think the girls would like to have a new friend. Were you thinking Saturday?”
“Saturday sounds good. How about noon? I usually feed Sam around eleven o’clock, so she’ll have had her food digested by the time we get there. It will help them run out that excess energy.” She frowned. “Or is that your girls’ nap time?”
“No, no it’s not. Unfortunately, they refuse to take naps. I would give anything for a little break in the day.”
She chuckled. “I totally get that. Hopefully the park date will tire them out enough for one. Well, back to work I go.”
“Thanks, Holly.”
With a nod, she closed his office door behind her.
Guy stared at it for a few minutes. He couldn’t put a finger on it, but she made him uncomfortable. Was he reading too much into her play date offer? Did she want more than a work relationship? But why should it matter. He didn’t want more than a work relationship. She wasn’t Michelle.
His mouth dropped open, startled by his line of thinking. Did he want a relationship with Michelle? Why, when he had run from it in the first place?
Not, the relationship, but your guilt.
Guilt was a funny thing. It had run him out of the state, and then quickly became inconsequential. Yet, now that he was back in Freedom Lake, he was forced to face it. He didn’t want to make the same mistakes he had in the past.
But you’re human. Fallible. And now God doesn’t guide your steps.
He gulped. God no longer guided his steps.
Beads of perspiration popped upon his upper lip. It was time to get out of the office. He glanced at the clock, thankful to see lunch time staring back at him. He grabbed his keys and left his office behind, without a backward glance. “Holly, I’m going to lunch. I’ll be back in thirty.”
“Sure, Sheriff. Enjoy.”
The Sheriff’s department was located downtown, directly across from LeeAnn’s Bakery. Normally he would eat there, but he just didn’t want to. He needed a breather. He needed the lake.
Guy glanced at the bakery, trying to determine if he should get lunch to go. If he went in there, chances were some citizen would stop and ask him a question and lunch would be over before he knew it. He shook his head. Lunch could wait. Peace called in the form of his bench at the lake.
Within a few minutes, the sight of the bench greeted him. It was empty. He shoved his hands into his pockets as the spring breeze caressed his face. Hopefully the perfect temperatures would last before an Indian summer kicked in.
As he neared the bench, he looked up to take in the surroundings. He stopped short as a figure hustled toward his bench.
Michelle.
Why couldn’t he stop running into her? He glanced back toward his car, the need to escape pressing against him. He needed solitude. Being around Michelle wouldn’t grant him any kind of respite.
He turned back around and then flinched as the sound of crying reached his ears. In record time, his feet had propelled him forward, moving on their own accord. In a heartbeat, Guy was by her side, guiding her toward the bench. Her soft cries tore at his heart. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head as the tears continued to stream down his face.
“Chelle Belle...”
The name broke through and she met his gaze, her hazel eyes luminous with tears. “Rough day at work.”
“It’s only...” he glanced at his watch. “12:10. How could you have such a bad day already?”
“Someone came in seeking representation.” She stared at the lake.
What was she thinking? Even though she sat right next to him, Michelle was miles away. Did he even want to pry? Should he leave her alone?
Aren’t you always doing that?
Ouch. “Why does that make you cry? Isn’t that good for business?”
A sigh escaped her and he winced. It sounded like it carried the weight of the world.
“She killed someone.”
He understood her tears now, but wondered if there was more to it. This couldn’t be the first time she was asked to represent a person like that. There had to be more to it. Question was: would he dig deeper or keep it strictly on surface level?
“Are you going to take her case?”
She shook her head vigorously, her hair swinging with the movement. Even in tears, she was still a classic beauty. “How can I defend someone when all I can think about are my parents?”
Good question. How did you move forward when you were stuck in the past? Like you are with Charlene? Guy closed his eyes momentarily. Some counsel he made.
“Do what you think is best. If you can’t defend her, then refer her to someone who will. You can’t be expected to do something that goes against who you are.”
“But what if God orchestrated this meeting?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Did you just say God?”
She rolled her eyes. “A lot has changed since we...since high school. I’m kind of on speaking terms with Him now.”
“Kind of?” What had happened to the girl he used to know?
“We talk, but I find it hard to believe that He’s so good. Jo is trying to convince me of it.” Michelle crossed her legs and leaned back, wiping the last vestige of tears. “I went to church with her and Bible study to point out the faulty logic, only I couldn’t. The idea of being forgiven for every wrong I’ve ever committed is like a glass of water in the middle of the dessert. I’m desperate enough to drink.”
His jaw clenched. He’d once held the same beliefs. Believed in a God that was good. Then Charlene died. No, He let Charlene die.
How could He be good?
“What about you?” she asked.
“What about me?”
“Do you believe? Do you buy into Jesus as your Savior?”
“I used to. But then life happened.”
“It always does.” She sighed. “Are you going to come to another Bible
