With Frank it really hadn't bothered her that much though, she was what she was, she thought, and Frank simply reacted to it.
Joe however was different. She knew it was stupid. At twenty nine she had to be at least eight or nine years older than him, and, she reminded herself, there is no such thing as love at first sight, but it sure felt that way. She just hoped it could be that way. Although she had taken many men to her bed in the dingy apartment, she had never, she felt, made love in her entire life, and she wondered what it would be like.
As Joe swam towards her she wondered, not knowing he was thinking similarly, if he could be interested in her. She knew she was attractive, but attractive to him? And, was this an okay thing to be thinking? But what exactly was she thinking? She wondered.
Joe flipped back over as he neared the raft, grabbed the side and slipped out of the water. He was still embarrassed, but was sure she hadn't seen. She would have said something right? He tried to convince himself that she would have, but in truth he had no idea, and, although he had just met her, he found himself drawn to her, and more than just physically. Was that possible? He wondered.
He climbed up on the raft and sat beside her. He was aware of how close he sat, and became slightly embarrassed all over again. She spoke first.
"Uummm, let’s not get off to a bad start, okay, Joe? Of course who am I to talk, I was sitting here thinking about just ignoring what happened, but..."
His eye's bulged slightly. She did see, he thought, wonderful! What she said next threw him though, and it took a couple of seconds to click for him.
"Joe, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you, I just, you know, thought you might want me to go in with you."
She's apologizing to me? Joe thought. Why? Aloud he said, "I'm the one who should be apologizing, Arlene, not you. I did want you to come in with me... I probably wouldn't have asked though. I didn't think you would want to.., and I acted like a jerk, sort of. I should apologize, though, not you."
A smile lit up her face, as she spoke. "You mean I didn't embarrass myself, or you I guess?"
"No, Arlene, if anything I embarrassed myself. I acted like a freaking eighteen year old. I've just never been around... well... I've never been around a woman, I guess. I spent a lot of time, too much time, hanging around with girls..." He let the statement trail off, more embarrassed at the honesty than anything else. The girls he had gone out with never talked about anything personal at all, just stupid stuff. How you been? Or, are you going out Saturday night? Or, I heard so and so is going out with so and so, dumb stuff, nothing important ever.
"Joe?" he turned and looked at her as she spoke, "are you embarrassed because of what happened, or because it happened when you looked at me? I mean, well... because of what I used to be?" It hurt to ask the question, and she was afraid of the answer, but she had to know.
Joe took a deep breath before he answered. "Arlene, I only... because of the way I acted. Like a kid, well sort of. I was afraid you would think I was treating you like you were cheap or something," he paused and then added hastily. "I don't think that though. I just, well, when you took off your clothes, I... well... I mean you're beautiful, Arlene, and I guess..." He was too embarrassed to continue, and let his last words trail off. He half expected her to yell at him, or tell him he would have to learn to control himself, or something along those lines. Maybe even be mad, or hurt. He didn't know. When he had spoken he had been staring out into the calm lake, unable to meet her eyes, and so had not seen the smile that had lit up her face, and removed the wrinkled lines of worry from her forehead. She reached across and placed her hand gently over his.
"Joe?" when he turned she kissed him fully on the lips, and he found himself pulling her to him, returning the kiss passionately. He realized there would be no hiding his feelings this time. She pulled away reluctantly, and said, "Joe, you're shaking."
He was surprised to see that he was. Not a little either, a lot.
Arlene slipped easily off the raft and back into the water. "Come on, let's eat first," she said.
First? He asked himself, first?
She smiled up at him. Not seductively, just happily, as she reached up, took his hand, and pulled him into the water. His mind had not been on eating exactly, and he had to snap his mouth closed quickly, to keep from choking on the water. The coldness helped a great deal, and he eagerly swam towards the shore behind her.
The meal was excellent. Joe's mind was not entirely impaled upon what she had said, as she swam away from the dock. She was beautiful, and he did want
