Tonio and Shalea retreated to a couch in the corner to my left. When I caught his eyes, he forced a smile that looked guilty.
Bryon enjoyed the pastry and fed it to one of his girls while he watched Kress kiss Hemian, his all-time favourite.
“We can do that, too, if you like,” Dela said and leaned in to Liarana. They kissed with sloppy smooches, sticking out their tongues and sucking on each other’s lips. Instead of joining them, I used it as study material and learned a trick or two.
After I failed to engage and refused to get touched, Kress plunged himself beside me, offering a different strand of Morell. But lust was not the problem, my morals were since I was still able to fantasise about Claire’s plump lips.
“She would be here, too, if she could. You don’t have to hesitate. We’re family,” he said as if he could read my thoughts. In reality, he just knew her too well.
My heart jumped, listening to him. Cursed be the Siren’s voice that made me agree to undress the first layer of my outfit. He cuddled with me while the girls caressed Hemian for our entertainment. When I thought about it, I realised Kress was the type of guy I would usually fall for, the feminine type. Not a hair grew on his graceful body.
“You know what I like most about you?” he asked.
I forced out an ironic grunt. “My eyes?”
“The way you handle things. As if it’s your duty to achieve whatever it is. Just like him.” He winked at Tonio. “You both love control. I don’t know if that makes you a good pair. You’re the girl on top. I envy him a little.”
The rhythm inside my chest skipped a beat.
“His urge to be the leader will make him unable to enjoy your masculine side; What a shame. Wouldn’t it all be so darn complicated, I would’ve proposed to you instead. A girl I would trade the parlour in for.” The vibration of his voice in my ears eased my clenched jaw and when he leaned in for a kiss, my worries dropped; I took the lead from him and lost myself in his lips.
22. Reunion
During our late stay at the parlour, the reasons for my escape resurfaced. Previously, I had drowned them in lust and laughter. I even thought I could live my truth while being married to Tonio—that I could be satisfied. Life would be comfortable, apart from professional duties and the day we had to display an heir to Evrett.
A proper reason for my escape would be the grimoire. My grandfather and the Di Centis were connected. I considered that they made their own plans. Why else did he insist on the marriage? As long as they left me in the dark about their true goals, I wouldn’t take part in their political warfare.
Meanwhile, Tonio fell asleep on the couch. Kress and Hemian slept arm in arm beside me, after I watched them have sex in a way I never imagined was possible. Dela and Lianara left early because I refused to undress.
The only one awake besides me was Bryon. He grunted every time he thrust into the girl from behind, while she kissed the guy underneath her.
Everyone had their own preference, but a drugged orgy was too intense for my taste. Perhaps I needed to learn it like they once did.
My principles held me back. For me to feel lust, there had to be more. Perhaps, love. Then again, what is love? I had experienced companionship and lust. Was love a mixture of them both? That’s how I felt about Claire, even though we had a rocky start, boiling middle and soon, a disastrous end.
I excused myself to get some air instead of smoke into my lungs and watched the waves crash into each other. Walking along the beach, I reminisced over my arrival and the ship that brought me here.
The Virgin Wench.
We were the same. Virgin, as in inexperienced and also always travelling under someone else’s command, thus staying a virgin for life—without a sense of self.
At sunrise, I reached the harbour and witnessed small boats return to the coast with freshly caught fish. I stepped onto the dock.
The place Deg’s pirate ship had seesawed the last time was empty. The thought of never seeing him again—since I didn’t know which harbour they visited—forced tears from my eyes.
I missed him.
At least the retired Captain snoozed at his usual place in front of pub Shipwreck.
“Captain Niklin.” I shook him awake. “I came to say goodbye.”
“Ye didn’t forget the ol’ Cap’n, did ye,” he laughed and placed the compass inside my hand. “Me old mates came along, ye know. They didn’t believe me when I told them about you, said the crazy took over a loner. Only one young lad listened. Ye younglings, ye still care.”
I placed my hands around his and manifested health on him with an inner chant. “Thank you, very much,” I said, to which his eyes lit up and his smile revealed some missing teeth. Dry lips curled over his gums. If he hadn’t been retired, I would’ve begged to accompany him on his adventures.
The pub door swung open and seamen left one by one, pulling their trousers up and putting on their hats.
One head taller than I remembered, Deg stumbled through the door. He stood still, paralysed.
“That’s the one,” the old Captain said. “Ye know him?”
“He’s the one who saved me,” I said and jumped into his arms.
He hugged me, almost crushing my spine. “Me lass, oh, Verra,” he sniffed.
“You’ve grown a lot,” I said, fondling his shoulders. Around his neck hung the amulet I made. I let my fingers run over the thread.
“My lucky charm,” he said, clenching my hands on his chest. His bright smile turned into a frown. He knew we would
