Ashford grimaced. “With all his sisters, it may be an hour before we find anything out.”
“With all the days you’ve spent getting here, you’re worried about an hour?” Her nerves were so on edge she felt herself winding up again. “I’m sorry. But what took you so long? And why did you bring all those carts? It looks like you emptied the place before you left.”
“Ah, well. About that. I do need to tell you—”
The door burst open to reveal Jeremy Kerr, having wrestled his way past all the greeting servants. Tilly smiled to see Ashford’s old friend. He was as handsome as his wayward younger brother, but his heart was made of pure gold. She’d grown to love him and his gaggle of sisters over the years as much as she loved Kostya, Serena, and Owen. Her emotions were so ragged, she had to wipe away a few tears at the happiness she felt to see him again.
“It’s been far too long,” he said, kissing both of her cheeks. He thumped Ashford on the back. “This one I can get enough of, but why have you been hiding yourself, Tilly?”
She swallowed and shrugged, feeling bad all over again for neglecting Ashford while he traveled between their estates. “It’s so busy in London,” she said lamely.
Kostya and Serena joined them, along with another tray loaded with food. Tilly had to force a smile as Jeremy asked how Ariana’s first season went.
“She’s not married yet,” Ashford butted in, all but spraying crumbs around his hurried answer. Tilly exchanged a look with Serena and Kostya, but before either of them could say anything, Ashford barreled on. “How are the girls? I hear you’re to be an uncle again soon? That’s wonderful news. Have you heard from Nick in Italy lately?”
Tilly choked on her tea. What was he doing? This wasn’t casual at all. Kostya tried to change the subject, but the words quickly died in his throat when they all noticed Jeremy’s sudden pallor. He’d gone absolutely stark white. His hand shook and his teacup clattered to the floor. Serena bent to pick it up but stopped, also alarmed at the look on his face.
“Wh-what’s that about Nick?” he asked, having to clear his throat several times to get all the words out. “You’ve heard he’s in Italy? Where? Who told you this? When?”
Of course Ashford had nothing to say to those questions. Tilly fumbled for an explanation.
“He’s not in Italy any longer?” she asked, feeling cold all over.
“But when was he in Italy?” Jeremy leaned forward. “Tell me what you know. If you’ve got some information after all these years, I must hear it at once.”
A deafening silence fell over the room. After what seemed like a year of it, Serena picked up the fallen cup and pressed a towel to the stain. Horrified beyond comprehension at Jeremy’s response, Tilly nudged Ashford in the ribs with her elbow. Hard.
“I’m terribly sorry,” Ashford said, looking at her as if he might be ill. She knew the feeling. “I haven’t heard anything new at all. It’s only… didn’t he go to Italy? To follow an investment scheme?”
It was all Tilly could do to keep from putting her head between her knees. Nick was never Jeremy’s favorite topic. He’d run up a lot of debts before she and Ashford tempted him out of the country with the investment they secretly set up. As far as they knew, he’d remained overseas throughout the past eighteen years, occasionally sending trinkets to his sisters or a bottle of wine to Jeremy, but never returning to England or taking care of his debts. As much as it soured the conversation to bring him up, Jeremy always knew his general whereabouts. If he didn’t now, it could only mean…
She couldn’t keep a moan from escaping. Ashford gripped her hand, still stammering apologies and explanations to Jeremy. It was as if she’d fallen down a bottomless pit. Even though she could feel herself sitting on the lumpy brocade chair, all her other senses reeled. Unable to keep herself together, she bolted from the room, dragging Ashford along with her.
“Bloody hell, what’s come over them?” she heard Jeremy say as she fled. Serena said something to soothe him but she was too far down her tunnel of terror to hear anything more.
Ashford stopped her from blindly careening down the hallway and pressed her against the wall to keep her from falling over. “It doesn’t mean anything,” he said.
“You don’t believe that,” she said, barely able to push the words past whatever was constricting her throat. She wanted to dissolve into a puddle of tears, but what good would it do? “Nick’s missing. He’s been missing since we sent him away, but now he’s not where he should be. Which means—”
“It doesn’t mean anything,” he repeated, pulling her raggedly against him. “Breathe, my love. You’re making yourself ill.” He pressed his face into her hair. “I promise you, I will fix this. Now we’re here, we can get a spell to work. I’ll find her. I promise.”
She closed her eyes and let his endless babbling soothe her. How she wanted to believe him. He’d never let her down before, not really. But nothing had ever been this important before. Even when she thought she was lost forever in time and might never see him again. If he’d never found her, they never would have had Ariana and she never would have felt this bone shattering fear and anguish.
“I need to see the boys,” she gasped. She had to hug her children, her remaining children, and make sure they were all right. Make sure she hadn’t somehow lost them as well.
“Of course,” he answered, sweeping her into his arms and carrying her toward the stairs.
Halfway up, she felt silly and asked him to put her down. He shook
