“Nothing we cared about? I cared about the actual house! I loved that place. It was my home. And what about the servants? That was their home, too. And their livelihood.”
“The servants have been well taken care of and I made sure no one would be around when I…” He didn’t think he should elaborate too much at the moment, but felt oddly offended that she thought he wouldn’t care for his servants. He’d known some of them since he was a child.
She turned away, too angry to look at him, then quickly whirled back around. “What if Ariana needed the portal to get home?”
He tried to hide the shiver of fear that ran up his spine. He’d thought of that, certainly. “All their notes in the book led me to believe she was using a spell, not the portal,” he said.
Once again, he hoped it was true. His overwhelming desire to be free of his family's long curse might have clouded his judgment a tad.
“What if this ruins something in the future? For us? What if I don’t meet you because Belmary House isn’t there in my time?”
In truth, that hadn’t occurred to him and his heart nearly jumped into his throat. But it just as soon eased its furious beating because they clearly had met. She was right in front of him. Tapping her foot and looking like she wanted to set him on fire, but she was there. Nothing had changed for them.
“We obviously have met,” he said, trying not to sound too satisfied about it. “It must be one of those paradoxes old Liam was always on about.”
Before she could come at him with more sound arguments and deserved fury, Kostya came into the room.
“You couldn’t knock?” Matilda huffed at the same time Ashford said, “Thank God.”
Hurt mingled with her outrage and he wanted to hold her and apologize more sincerely but he simply couldn’t right now. He had a plan he needed to put into action as soon as possible.
“I did knock,” Kostya said. “What’s wrong, Tilly?”
She gripped her skirts in her fists, probably to keep from hitting him with Kostya as a witness. “Have Lord Assford tell you.” She pushed her way past Kostya, slamming the door behind her on her way out.
“Did she just call you—”
“She’s rightfully angry with me. I burned down the London house.” Ashford moved to his spot at his desk, picking up where he left off in his attempt to craft a new spell.
“Belmary House?”
Ashford looked up from his notes. Kostya gaped at him. “How many houses in London do I have?” He waved him into a chair on the other side of his desk. “It’s not important right now. What news do you have for me? Good?”
It took a few seconds for Kostya to compose himself. It was clear he had a thousand questions about the house. Ashford didn’t have a single regret about setting the bloody thing aflame. He only wished everyone else could see it was the only way.
Kostya didn’t see, that was certain. He leaned across the desk to peer into Ashford’s eyes. “When was the last time you slept?”
He decided not to waste time trying to defend his sanity and gave his oldest friend his most ruthless glare. “Were you able to see her or not? I just about have this spell ready.”
Kostya sighed long and hard before giving in. “I don’t believe scrying is my specialty by any means. I tried a dish of water, a bucket, the lake, the river, and a puddle. I tried every spell I came across in the book that didn’t involve killing something— no, I’m not going to use those so get that look off your face.”
“Not a hint of her, then?”
“No. Nothing of Nicholas Kerr, either. I’m very sorry, Julian.”
Ashford swept his gaze over the spell he’d been working on. It would have to do.
“Plan B, then.” He stood up, nodding dismissively toward the door.
Kostya refused to be dismissed. “Well, I know Plan A was to go after Ariana if I could scry a year or a location. But what is Plan B?”
After rustling his papers impatiently and opening and shutting the desk drawers and Kostya still hadn’t left the room, Ashford gave in. “Not a word to Matilda.”
“I can’t promise that. Especially not with the way you’re flailing about. It’s quite worrisome.”
Ashford stilled his hands and sat back down. “Then go and look through the book again for more scrying spells your tender heart can handle casting. I no longer need your help.”
“I’m going to forgive you in advance for this behavior because I know how worried you are about Ariana.”
Ah, he was being a jackass, taking out his frustrations on his loved ones. Next he’d be snapping at the boys. He’d never once felt so helpless and he’d been in some fairly bleak situations in his life. None so bleak as the thought of losing his precious only daughter.
He slammed his fist into the top of his desk, then put his head in his hands, ignoring the throbbing in his knuckles. No pain was worse than the constant stabbing fear that he might have lost Ariana forever. Or the knowledge that it was his fault.
“I’m going after Nick,” he finally confessed. He knew Kostya wouldn’t leave the room or his side until he did.
“But I wasn’t able to locate him, either,” Kostya reminded him.
“I know exactly where and when to find him.” He lowered his hands and stared at Kostya, daring him to try to stop him.
“You don’t mean to try and go back to before Ariana was born? To your own timeline?”
“That’s exactly what I mean to do. And I mean to succeed.”
He didn’t need Kostya to tell him how dangerous it was. He had never before ventured into his own past. If
